


Sanctuary (For All)

by Babygirl_Francesca



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Cute, Drama, Family Reunions, Fix-It, M/M, Romance, a dog!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-12
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2019-10-26 15:39:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 57,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17748659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Babygirl_Francesca/pseuds/Babygirl_Francesca
Summary: Rick never finds Lori and Carl, instead heading North with Morgan. Along the way they form a group, eventually meeting Negan. With Rick's influence, the Sanctuary becomes a good place, trading with the other communities. However, when Shane Walsh and his group arrive in Alexandria, a war ensues.





	1. Andy & Negan

**Author's Note:**

> -I tried to stay true to who I think would be alive and dead if Rick wasn't with the Atlanta group, but you won't see them until later.  
> -Judith is not going to be Shane's kid! I'm saying that Lori got pregnant like... Days before Rick's accident, so when she appears she is Rick's.  
> -Why did I give Rick a dog? Cute factor!  
> -This chapter is a little slow,,, but I promise it picks up!  
> -FINALLY! There's a count down in time progression, but a count down to what? Who knows. I just wanted to point out that it's not three years since the apocalypse has started, it's three years until something BIG happens.

**3 YEARS OUT**

"So what you're saying is, everyone in King County is  _gone?_ Just up and left?" Rick questioned, his mouth slightly agape as he leaned forward in one of Morgan's arm chairs.

Duane was in one corner with a well read comic book while Morgan sat in the chair opposite of him nursing a now long cold cup of coffee. It was early morning and they'd retrieved several bags full of guns from the sheriffs department the day before. Rick had meant to head out immediately but Morgan had goaded him into staying for another day. It wasn't like Rick even knew where he would have gone though. He didn't have any clue where Lori and Carl might be.

"They didn't leave because they wanted to of course. An evacuation was ordered. I can't tell you why Duane, Jenny, and I didn't go... I just, I wanted to stick around. Other people wanted too as well. Those are the walkers in the street." He explained and gripped the stock of his rifle when he said Jenny's name.

"Where were they evacuated to?" Rick figured the obvious of Atlanta, but with everyone potentially going there, it would get very full very fast. Rick knew that most coastal cities had large centers to hold lots of people, but somewhere as far inland as Atlanta probably wouldn't be prepared for that.

"It really just depends. We're North of Atlanta so a lot of folks around here were probably sent further North. Charlotte, Nashville. The people who went to Atlanta were usually from Southern Georgia. Someone from King County... They could have ended up anywhere Rick, I'm sorry."

"North then, I'll head north." Rick made up his mind. If that's where Lori and Carl were most likely evacuated to, then that's where he would go. "I want you to come with me."

Morgan looked like he was considering the offer for a moment, his eyes locked on Duane who pretended to not be listening to their conversation. Duane was around Carl's age and Rick figured the two would get on well if they ever met.

"Let me think about it." Morgan finally answered and loosened the grip on his gun slightly, letting it lean against his chair.

"Believe it or not, we have all the time in the world." Rick said after a long silence and stared towards the window even though it was boarded up.

This wasn't Rick's house, it wasn't Morgan's house. It was nobody's house now. They had no reason to stay here, they could keep moving forever if they really wanted to and Rick idly wondered if that wasn't what they were going to have to do. they had kept the noise levels down for the past few days, but the three of them still noticed a rise in the number of walkers milling around outside the house. They didn't seem like they new specifically where the noise was coming from, but like they knew that this neighborhood had something living in it.

* * *

"We ain't stopping." Morgan mumbled under his breath as they drove by another rest stop and Duane opened his mouth to ask if they could pull over.

It would be their fifth stop after driving for a day. Duane didn't really have to stop all that often, he just wanted to get out of the car. Rick understood, he wanted out of the car as well but they were following signs that pointed towards a  _REFUGEE CENTER_ that Rick hoped might hold the answer to his missing people.

"Shane was kind of a prick sometimes, but I think he would take care of Carl and Lori. No way he would just take off and leave them." Rick said, voice only barely loud enough to outdecibel the Tom Petty CD mellowing through the car.

"Sometimes pricks can be more useful than you think." Morgan drummed his fingers on the side of the window.

"Lori and I were thinking of having another kid. Did you ever want another?" Rick was trying to fill the air with something other than human silence. Music could only go so far if the atmosphere was tense.

The mood of the car wasn't stifling by any means, but Rick still felt better to have, even meaningless, conversation.

"Not really. A couple times we thought maybe Jenny was pregnant and we were excited, but we weren't too sad when we found out it was just wishful thinking. We weren't trying, but we wouldn't have been unhappy if it had happened."

Rick could understand that. The only reason it seemed like Lori even wanted a baby was just so that she would have more of an excuse to stay home all day. Rick didn't initially mind that Lori didn't have a job, since it let her take care of Carl. When Carl started school though, it wasn't like Lori got anything done around the house-- she just slept in late and lazed around. And Rick certainly didn't make enough money to come home to a wife that did nothing all day and have nothing on the table for dinner. So another baby, that had been their plan, and for some reason Rick was almost happy that that hadn't happened.

They were almost to the border of South Carolina. They would only pass through the very tip on their way into North Carolina. Based on the  _REFUGEE CENTER_ signs, Rick figured it was in South Carolina, so maybe they were closer than they thought.

"Maybe this refugee center will be  _something_." Rick emphasized the word, drawing attention to just how much nothingness they'd driven past on their way north.

They'd been on the road three days now and hadn't passed anyone. One car going the opposite direction that didn't slow down, and one group of about twenty walkers that they'd had to veer to avoid. Other than that though... It was just nothing. All of America was in their grasp and they hadn't found one single  _thing._

"Maybe it won't." Morgan said and Rick was annoyed with the negativity, but understood the sentiment. He shouldn't get his hopes up.

They saw smoke in the distance, rising up in black tendrils, and Rick felt himself subconsciously pushing down on the gas. He couldn't be entirely sure if he was trying to get north of a fire before it spread, or trying to see just what was going up in flames.

"Slow down Rick." Morgan chided and Rick slowly eased his foot up, but the tension coiling low in his stomach didn't let up.

Finally, they came upon it. Maybe two miles to the east was a large stadium completely engulfed in flames. Rick drew the van to a gentle stop and the three of them stared out of the tinted windows, enamored with the sight of something breathing.

Not long after, they spotted actual people in the distance, about three of them making their way through a grassy field from the stadium. They were running at full speed and Rick's amygdala told him to floor it and get away from these people, but his sense of compassion and humanness told him to stop and wait for them. To see who they are.

"Should I go?" Risk asked Morgan as the people seemed to notice the van idling on the highway and made a more direct line for it.

"They seem scared, maybe we should stay." Morgan suggested and Rick turned off the van, telling him and Duane to stay put before getting out, his hand resting on his colt python.

"Hey!" One of the voices, obviously a woman's yelled as they drew closer. Rick held a hand up high in greeting.

As they came closer into focus Rick could see one blonde Caucasian and the other blonde but with dark skin, a rather nondescript man was trailing slightly behind them.

"I'm Rick Grimes!" He called as they were finally slowing down to meet him. The taller blonde put her hands on her knees and took a few deep breaths to resteady her lungs.

"Laura," she panted. "I'm Laura."

She came up to Rick first, holding out her hand for him to shake. He noticed a bizarre and large tattoo on her neck but didn't comment on it, it wasn't his place to make a judgement on weird tattoos in the middle of an apocalypse.

"And I'm Arat." The other girl introduced herself but didn't shake his hand, just waved.

The man was named Nick and seemed a little uncomfortably quiet.

"Are you guys from the refugee center?" Rick asked, hoping that wasn't what he was seeing burning to a crisp in the center of the field. Rick would need to question them fairly quickly in case the grass caught fire as well. This would also undoubtedly bring in tons of walkers.

"Yeah, might be all that's left." Laura answered, seeming to speak for the three of them.

"Were their lots of people there? Children?" He asked quickly, trying to get a handle on whether or not he should be rushing into the building.

"At first yes, a month or two ago. People were being moved out of the stadium though, old and the young first. If your kid was in their then they were bused out a long time ago to another, bigger, evacuation point." She explained, looking slightly sorry.

Rick tried to move on from that. He supposed it wouldn't have been good for Lori and Carl to have been caught up in the fire, but at least if he knew for sure that they'd been there... "What started the fire?"

"Assholes!" Arat almost yelled, looking very angry.

"Sorry, but she's right. We were running low on food and some people decided to start a fire and push some of us out, but then the whole place went up and most didn't make it out. Could we, could we travel with you?" She asked and seemed so damn genuine that Rick found himself unable to say no.

"Yeah, yeah that should be fine. I'll introduce you to Morgan and Duane."

Rick walked around to the back of the police van and opened the two back doors, Duane was sitting in the back and Rick called him out. It wasn't that Rick thought these people were going to kill Duane... Well maybe he did have that worry, Duane would be safer in the bench seat up front.

"This is Duane, and his father Morgan," Rick motioned to Morgan who had also gotten out of the front and was standing beside Rick.

"It's good to meet you. The refugee center...?"

"Gone, I'm sorry." Laura summed up again and Morgan nodded.

"I suppose we keep North to Charlotte then."

* * *

They'd been on the road for five more days and made barely any headway. The roads were blocked, cars stopped all along the road, abandoned.

They'd abandoned the van two days ago and were keeping to the roads on foot. As before, they didn't run into really much of anyone. The roads out of the city were fairly clear and more than one car barreled past them going three times the speed limit, none of them slowed down at all.

 _'Charlotte 20'_ A green metal sign read and Rick nodded to himself, they were getting close, but they would have to stop soon as the sun was starting to set and travelling at night seemed just too dangerous.

"There's a billboard for a restaurant half a mile up. You think that place would be safe?" Arat pointed at the sign that they could all clearly see even as the light waned and Rick squinted.

"That should work." Morgan nodded and they continued their march up the road until there was an off ramp. A single walker wandered leisurely up ramp towards them. Rick unsheathed his knife, grabbing it by its hair and then dispatching it quickly.

The rest of the road was empty, the restaurant was rustic looking, a real southern outfit that had about three cars in the parking lot.

"Laura, Nick, take the back. Morgan, Duane look through the cars. Arat, come with me through the front."

Four of them seemed to listen to Rick easily, it was Nick that had been giving Rick and Morgan a hard time for the past few days. He was a real alpha male, even if he would sometimes let Laura talk for him. Rick didn't like him at all. It wasn't like anyone was the leader, he, Morgan, and Laura had been making key decisions... But Nick was making reckless ones, and had been arguing for the sake of arguing.

Arat fell in step behind Rick as they came up to the front door. He put his hand on the knob as Arat gripped her knife tightly, ready to take anything that came at them. They had plenty of guns, but there was no point in needlessly drawing more walkers.

Laura and Nick disappeared behind the building, Morgan and Duane were quietly opening the cars and rummaging through them.

Rick pushed the door open and Arat pushed in first but wasn't met with anything in the dining room. Light filtered in through the windows and Rick could see that the chairs were turned over on tables and it had been closed when everything started.

From two push doors to the kitchen they heard signs of a struggle and Rick was immediately shouldering through them to see Laura killing a walker as another one had gripped Nick.

Rick came up from behind and shoved his knife through the base of the walkers skull, officially clearing the restaurant.

"Thanks." Laura said, clapping Rick once on the back. Nick didn't say anything.

Arat went out front to call Morgan and Duane in and then they set to work with their two hammers and box of nails to board up the front doors and pull all the curtains shut. They moved all the tables to the edges of the walls and set up sleeping bags in the center. Laura and Duane looked through the kitchen for food.

Once everything was set up and they were eating cans of green beans and regular beans by the light of a few candles, Rick rubbed at his eyes and stared around the faces in the room.

He didn't know anything about any of them, but he trusted most of them.

"Did you guys know each other before?" Rick asked, finally getting around to the 'getting to know' each other questions. They hadn't really been in talkative moods before. They'd all cracked a few jokes, but it had been mostly Laura and Arat talking to each other quietly while Rick, if ever, talked with Morgan or Duane.

"Yeah, Laura and I are step sisters. Grew up with each other." Arat said through a mouthful of food, washing it down with a warm and flat beer.

"Nick's my boyfriend. We found Arat when everything went to shit and tried to go to Charlotte but were directed to the refugee center instead." Laura washed her food down before speaking.

Rick's ears suddenly pricked up at the faint sound of a dog barking, he gripped his gun.

"Dad is that a dog?" Duane asked, looking over at Morgan.

"Morgan it's gonna draw them here." Rick said, suddenly tense.

Laura looked expectantly at the both of them, as if waiting for them to call the shot.

Morgan nodded after a moment. "Let's go then." Morgan stood up and Rick stood with him.

"Wait dad! You're not gonna kill it right?" Duane asked, looking mortified.

"No, no, we're just going to chase it off Duane. Stay here with Laura and Arat." Morgan soothed and Rick noticed the pointed lack of not mentioning Nick. He and Morgan should talk about what to do about him.

The back kitchen door was solid and didn't have a window on it so they had simply locked it from the inside, but had found the key as well. As soon as they were outside in the muggy, damp air, Rick could hear the dog ten fold, it was definitely nearby.

They both had their knives and flashlights out, holding one in each hand. Rick had hoped that the dog was towards the highway, but instead it was deeper into the forest. Rick didn't know this terrain. He didn't know if the forest stretched on for miles, or if they would stumble upon some densely populated subdivision.

The dog stopped barking abruptly it was silent in the forest.

"Do you think--"

"Shh!" Rick hissed as the dog started making noise again. It was growling this time and Morgan immediately stopped talking, listening intently.

They heard an opposing growling sound as well, a walker.

"I don't think it's running away, let's speed up." Rick said and they both were at a brisk jog now, nearing in on it.

They entered into a clearing, flashlights shining on a dog that was tied up to a tree, and a walker that was nearing in on it. Morgan stalked towards the walker and Rick made his way to the dog.

There was a note hammered into the tree he was tied to that read:

_This is Andy. He's fucking loud. But he's a good boy.  
_ _Doesn't seem to attract the dead unless he's yapping.  
_ _But he yaps a lot._   


There were two bags of dog food scattered on the ground around Andy and it looked like he was running out of food. No other walkers were nearby so the dog must have been keeping quiet as it went through its food, only starting to bark when it was hungry.

"What are we gonna do with it Rick?" Morgan asked, coming to stand next to him as Rick slowly approached to the dog with the back of his hand extended for him to sniff. "It's massive." Morgan remarked.

The dog sniffed Rick's hand tentatively and then seemed to almost let out a sigh, letting its long face fall into Rick's open palm. "This is actually a great find. It's a hunting dog." Rick let the dog get used to him for a moment longer before walking around it, making sure that it wasn't bit, or hurt, or anything. It wasn't, it wasn't even barking. Obviously the previous owner hadn't known how to take care of one.

"You know how to take care of a dog like this?" Morgan inquired and reached his hand out for Andy as well. It didn't take as quickly to Morgan but after a minute sniffed him just as he had Rick.

"Well, in theory. My old partner, Shane, always,  _always_ wanted to be a hunter. So he would buy us these huge hunting trips, Texas, Montana, Wyoming. He had these grand ideas of getting a dog, retiring to a cabin somewhere and living off the land. He would drag me along to hunting dog shows, watch documentaries about them. Basically all he talked about for like a year... Then, as Shane does with all things he's 'passionate' about, he got bored." Rick summed up as quickly as he could and stood in front of the dog again.

"Sit." Rick said and the dog did so immediately, not even questioning Rick's command.

"So you wanna take it in with us? Why? Why not just set him free?" Morgan took a step back from the dog as Rick continued to go through a few easy commands and then making sure Andy knew his name, he did. Andy was smart, but not very old. He was a little below half as tall as Rick, but this breed would get to be maybe even a little taller than half of Rick.

"It's a wolfhound, bread to be a war dog hundreds of years ago. Think about how invaluable a perfectly trained  _war hound_ and hunting dog would be to us, when the food runs out? He'll track a deer for miles. He can't pack much but when he's full grown he'll be about the size of a donkey." Rick summed up and then decided to take his collar off. If Andy ran off, oh well it wasn't much of a loss, but if he stayed, it was a huge gain.

Rick unsnapped his collar and Andy immediately sat down, seeming to be waiting for a command.

"It'll eat a lot Rick." Morgan sighed.

"He can also eat what we can't." Rick contended as Andy stayed sitting.

Morgan seemed to give up after that and turned to head back, lighting the way for Rick and Andy.

Rick was surprised by how tight Andy was following him, Irish Wolfhounds weren't exactly known for being eager to please, but Andy seemed to have already accepted Rick as his new alpha.

They walked in silence for a moment, Andy was fleet of foot and didn't even snap a single twig under his weight, which was quite a feat.

As they grew closer to where they knew the restaurant was Rick started to pick up on something. It was the sound of feet moving on the ground, maybe walkers.

Then Rick heard scuffling, the two entities were close to one another and Rick stopped walking for a moment. He instinctively held up his hand in a motion that to a human would mean 'stop,' and Andy understood immediately, raising his front paw in the air and leaning in towards the sound. Morgan stopped as well.

" _Stop, stop it!"_ They could both hear a faint voice calling out.

"Is that one of ours?" Morgan asked and Rick listened again.

" _Fuck off!"_ The voice belonged to one of the two girls, Rick couldn't place it from this distance away but the two of them decided to pick up the pace immediately.

When they got to where the voice was coming from they could see Laura pushed up against a tree, her shirt ripped open by a knife and Nick trying to push himself against her. She also had a cut on her cheek.

"Come on Laur, we're both gonna die, why not just do it now? Together. I'll do you first and then myself." Nick goaded her and Laura tried to push him off of her, obviously not wanting what he was suggesting.

"Get off of me jackass! We're not going to die!"

He flailed his knife again and just as it was about to strike her Andy let out a low growl which made Nick turn around to see where the noise was coming from. Rick's hand had been resting on his gun and when Nick turned around it was almost like instinct that Rick pulled it out and aimed it on Nick.

"Laura, come over here." Morgan held out his hand and Laura took it, walking the few feet to Morgan and letting him put an arm around her to make sure she was okay.

Andy moved forward baring his teeth and Nick moved back, obviously thinking that the dog was going to attack him. When Nick was backed up against a tree by Andy, Rick fired his gun and Nick dropped to the ground. Laura made a high pitched noise but other than that there was no more noise once Nick was on the group.

Andy turned immediately to return to Rick's side, looking up at him for approval. Rick gently ruffled his fingers through Andy's hair.

"Hol- _y shit!_ You just killed that guy." A new voice announced, stepping out of the tree line and into the faint light of Morgan and Rick's flashlights. It was three men, one woman, two flanking the one who had spoken.

"I had to." Rick trained his gun on them next and Andy lifted his front paw but didn't move in towards them.

"Oh I know. We heard the ruckus." The apparent leader said, nodding his head in approval to Rick. "And you've got a good fucking moral compass, the kind our kind likes to be with."

Rick raised an eyebrow.

"What I  _mean_ is, there's no laws anymore. Anyone can do anything, the fact that you," the man looked up and down Rick, taking in the sheriff's getup he was still wearing, "sheriff friendly, are still upholding them two months into the fucking apocalypse, means something." He finally finished and Rick still had an eyebrow raised but he seemed to understand what the man was saying.

Rick looked over to Morgan who simply tweaked his mouth to the side looked at the group and shook his head, a way to tell Rick that this one was up to him.

"And I suppose you guys still want to uphold those laws as well?" Rick questioned and patted Andy once on the head, making him relax.

"Well I mean, overlooking murder," one of them said, smarmy and sarcastically.

"Well,  _we_ mean, that rules are important. Saving people is important. We can work together." The man offered and took a step towards them.

Andy stood tense again, his body shaking with the want to go up to the men, to corner them again. Rick wished that Andy still had a lead on him because they didn't know each other very well, Andy would still ultimately do what he wanted and not necessarily what Rick wanted.

"Come inside with us, we'll  _talk._ " Rick emphasized and motioned for Laura and Morgan to go in first, then the new group, and Rick took up the rear with Andy.

The file of the men changed then, the woman and one of the men walked together, and the talkative one walked in the back, closest to Rick on their way into the restaurant and dining room.

"Laura are you okay? We heard the shots but I didn't want to leave Duane alone!" Arat was on her feet immediately, taking Laura from Morgan's arm and nesting down with her among the sleeping bags.

"I'm fine. Nick, he, he tried to kill me." She whispered and then their conversation was hushed and Rick couldn't hear it anymore, but neither of them were trying to kill him so hopefully they weren't too mad at him.

"Is this the dog!?" Duane asked excitedly, ignoring the three strange men in favor of walking up to Andy. Rick stopped him short.

"Hey not too close Duane, we still don't know him very well. Let's make sure he's safe for a couple of days and then you can pet him." Rick suggested and Duane looked to his dad for the final answer but Morgan just nodded as well.

Morgan lit the candles again and they both set their flashlights on the tables to provide proper lighting for a conversation.

"Duane why don't you go sit by the ladies?" Morgan motioned while the five men took chairs down from the tables and took a seat.

"So who's in charge here?" The man from earlier asked, leaning back in the hard wood chair, putting his ankle on the opposite knee.

"No one. Morgan, Laura, Arat, and I make decisions equally." Rick said immediately.

Andy looked anxious for a moment and then found a leftover skillet of beans that they'd heated up, about half was left and he got to work eating that. Rick let him, there was no telling how long ago he'd finished all the food.

"Hm," He seemed to think about that for a moment. "I'm Negan. This is Simon. Blonde one is Dwight, and then his wife Sherry. We don't have a bigger group, this is it."

"Well we don't either." Rick added, but he figured it was pretty obvious. "Where are you guys from?"

"Charlotte, got pushed out by all the fires and riots." Dwight, Rick was pretty sure, answered and he watched Sherry sadly downturn her lips at the answer.

"So that's it, Charlotte's gone? There's no refugees?" Morgan interrupted and Rick looked down at his lap. Of course Charlotte was gone too. Finding Lori and Carl would be like finding and needle in a haystack. It would be virtually impossible.

"There's nothing left. Were you guys heading there?" Negan asked calmly.

"My wife and son, that seemed like where they would have been. But I suppose not anymore." Rick sighed and ran a hand over his face, pushing his sweat slicked hair back.

"I'm sorry Rick, there's nothing there." Negan said, his tone somber.

"Where do we go now?" Laura asked, drawing attention to their corner of the room.

It was silent in the restaurant for a moment. Everyone seemed to hold their breath as no one had an answer to that.

"We can figure that out in the morning." Rick finally said and stood up from the chair. Andy sensed that Rick was on the move again and so came to stand by him. "I'm going to sleep in the kitchens, still not sure about the dog." Rick said and grabbed what he was pretty sure was his sleeping bag off the floor.

Rick didn't feel apprehensive about Negan's group at all for some reason. Negan seemed genuine, Dwight and Sherry seemed kind, Simon seemed a little off but not incredibly dangerous. He would feel fine with them spending the night together.

"Why don't I set up in the kitchen too. Like you said, not sure about the dog." Negan offered and Rick couldn't find an valid excuse to turn him down, though he was rapidly searching for one so he finally just nodded and the lights were turned out as Rick brought a flashlight with him into the kitchen. The doors had a latch that they could close so Andy couldn't go wandering around the dining area.

Negan had a sleeping bag on his huge camping backpack and took that off, unrolling it on the ground. They had to be pretty close together to fit in the kitchen together, but they each took opposite sides and it was fine.

"Rick, listen let's talk for a minute." Negan said and came to stand next to Rick, leaning against one of the stainless steel counters as Andy found a spot to sleep for the night right on top of Rick's sleeping back.

"What about?" Rick questioned.

"I want this to work out. I want us to survive together, so I'm going to tell you everything I know about Dwight, Simon and Sherry." He started, lowering his voice to barely above a whisper and Rick nodded, ready to listen. "Sherry, good lady. Went to high school with her. We didn't really stay in contact but I trust her. I don't know Dwight very well, he seems more volatile of the two, but, and this is just my opinion, if Sherry trusts him I can trust him. Simon I didn't really know before all of this. I feel like I've met him before, can't really place where, more like I've just seen his face. I'm not gonna say he's dangerous, he's not. I've been travelling with these guys for two months, living nearby them it what used to be the Charlotte refugee camps. Simon's the only one I'd say we have to keep our eye on."

"We?" Rick questioned his word choice.

"Don't bullshit me Rick. No leader? That's not realistic, you lead them in there, you're the leader."

Rick didn't deny that everyone seemed to listen to him, but he didn't really want to be seen as the leader, he didn't want to be in charge of people.

"Morgan and Duane are good people," Rick started in without even explaining what he was doing to Negan. "Woke up from a coma in the middle of this and they were there to get me quickly acclimated. Laura's assertive and gets things done, she's not a bullshitter. Arat's the one who's a little more spontaneous but I trust both of them, Morgan trusts both of them with Duane. It was just that prick outside that I didn't trust. As I said before, I just met this dog. Hopefully he's an asset."

"Looks like we've made a real dream team here Rick, and Andy of course, second in command." The dog perked up at that and panted in an almost happy manner.

"Let's get some sleep. We can talk more in the sunlight."


	2. All The Pretty Horses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -slight timeline error, Abraham and co shouldn't be passing through the Carolina's until like over a year into the apocalypse but uh, let's just say they hustled? Also timeline error with Noah but who gives a shit right. Any other timeline inconsistencies I make, I'll try to explain reasonably, these ones just needed to happen and I couldn't explain them.

**2 YEARS, 8 MONTHS OUT**

"Andy," Rick got the dogs attention and held his hand up, making Andy stop in his tracks as Rick did. He pointed his hand towards a clearing in the forest and Andy slowly crept towards it, keeping his lanky body low to the forest floor.

Rick adjusted his hat and wiped some sweat from his brow. It was late August and would probably start getting chilly in a few months, they would have to move further towards the South Carolina coast to stay warm in the winter months. It never got terribly cold inland, but they also usually had heaters. Maybe they could scavenge some battery powered space heaters.

He moved slowly after Andy, about half the dogs speed as he had to work harder to remain unheard in the forest. He had his hunting rifle up and was ready to look through the sights whenever Andy found something.

When Rick finally made it to the clearing, Andy was standing across from a red wolf, maybe twenty yards from each other, just staring at each other. Andy looked momentarily back to Rick and Rick brought his gun up. The wolf was too focused on Andy.

"Don't shoot it Rick." Negan came up from behind and almost surprised Rick into shooting off his gun, but he lowered it and the wolf took his chance to run off.

"Andy stay!" He called as the dog started to run after it, but he stopped in his tracks and returned to Rick. "Why?" He finally turned to Negan and asked the man who was also holding a hunting rifle. "We're running out of food."

"Not low enough to eat wolf. Don't shoot them, they eat rotten meat and carry parasites." He explained and slung his gun over his shoulder, walking out into the clearing.

"What the hell are we out here hunting then?" He asked. Andy was a wolf dog and he found predators easily. It wasn't like a deer was going to walk right up to Andy, they would be just as skittish as they are around humans.

Negan shrugged his shoulders. "Mountain lions, black bear, deer. I've heard rumor of an elk or two somewhere in the state." He explained. It had come to their attention that they would need to start seriously hunting and they were the only ones who had any experience in it.

"Aren't lions just as carnivorous as wolves?" Rick questioned and they started walking again with Andy taking point. They walked close together, maybe a little too close, but Rick felt himself gravitating to Negan often.

"They don't eat rot, they eat fresh meat." He explained and Rick nodded.

"If this map is right we're almost to the other highway, we'll need to go south on it, take a left and then head North on 282 to rejoin the group." He explained after pulling out a tiny pocket map that really just showed their surrounding area.

"You think we're going to find anymore people?" Negan asked after a moment of silence. They could see a break in the trees up ahead and figured that was the road they were looking for.

"Do you want to find more people?" Rick questioned and pulled his gun up higher on his shoulder. They weren't doing that great with the people they had currently, adding more to the mix probably wouldn't be a good idea.

"I want to make something." He responded cryptically and Rick gave him a side eye before pulling his hat off and wiping his brow again. Negan reached over a plucked the hat off Rick's head, putting it on his own and sighing at the lack of sun hitting his face.

Rick snatched the hat back immediately. "What do you mean, 'make something?'" Rick asked, slowing down to a more leisurely pace. Andy trotted off in some other direction but Rick trusted him to come back. The dog had really proved himself over the past few months together, just as Negan, Dwight, Sherry, and Simon had.

"I community. Somewhere we could call home while we go out and scavenge. Grow some shit, build walls, yaknow, a refugee center minus all the fuckery that went on at those." He explained himself.

That seemed like a far off reality to Rick who was still living in the moment, still thinking of how they were gonna get by day to day. He admired Negan for being able to think about the long term, Rick just wasn't ready for that yet. But if Negan could keep thinking grand and Rick could keep thinking small then they could work with that.

They heard the sound of a car rumbling and they both naturally came to a stop. They were about ten feet from the road but easily concealed by the trees. Rick only hoped that Andy wouldn't rush onto the road.

However, that was apparently too much to hope for as Rick saw a flash of gray fur and then heard brakes squealing as the huge military truck came to a stop.

"Why did you stop it's just a fucking dog." A voice came from inside the cab, a woman's voice.

"Look at the size of it. I want him." Another voice came, deeper and authoritative

"Abraham you  _can not_ be serious. It's probably feral!" She protested as the car door opened and a set of boots hit the ground with a tremendous force. A smaller set hit the ground soon after.

Rick gripped his gun tightly, the Colt, and brought it up. He wasn't sure if Andy would run away or if he would let these people take him. The dog was calm, but he wasn't sure how far that went.

Negan put a hand on Rick's forearm. "Maybe they're good people?" He asked, beseeching Rick to ask questions first and, maybe, shoot later.

Rick held his gun steady for one more moment in thought, and then put it down, nodding along with what Negan had said.

He stood up and Negan with him, holstering their guns.

"Andy!" He called for the dog as they walked onto the highway. They didn't put their hands up, but they tried to look as unimposing as possible. This other group obviously had firepower.

"Woah, where the flying fuck did you guys come from?" The man asked. He was tall, expressive, and had a red crew cut along with a pair of military issue cargo pants.

The woman, rather scantily clad for the apocalypse, immediately had her hands on her gun. She didn't raise it at them, just had it ready in case.

"We were hunting in the area. Where did  _you_ come from?" Rick countered but was already able to tell that this wasn't going to turn into a violent situation.

Another man got out of the cab then and Rick figured that was all of them. He came to stand behind the tall man and the imposing woman, looking unsure of himself. He didn't look like he was battle hardened in any way.

"Houston." The man answered easily and Rick raised his eyebrows. That was a long way to drive in this world in four months. Maybe a little more since Rick had missed the beginning-but  _still_.

"And where are ya headed?" Negan joined in, standing in a more relaxed position.

"Washington D.C. We've got an important mission to get Eugene here up to the bigwigs. And now as time is a wastin', I'd suggest we get back on the road." The man said, waving a hand as if to make the two other people get back in the truck, apparently he didn't have that much authority over them though, because neither moved.

"Actually, Abraham, I believe that we should try and recruit these people to help with our mission. Time is of the importance, but so is safety, and having a larger group is just flat out safer." The man with the mullet said, stepping forward a bit. His voice and cadence irked Rick, but he seemed genuine.

Abraham sighed and then nodded, seeming to listen to what he had to say. Rick was confused by the power dynamic between the three people, who was in charge and what not, but he didn't voice this.

"I'm Rick, this is Negan. We have seven more people on adjacent highway waiting for us to get back." Rick explained in the spirit of transparency. These people seemed like they had food, guns, and a goal. Important things to have.

"I'm Abraham, this is Rosita. And that's Eugene, he's a scientist and he knows what caused this whole mess." Abraham explained, making Rick and Negan both look at each other in confusion.

"You know what caused the fucking  _apocalypse?"_ Negan questioned incredulously.

"Yes. I was part of a ten person team working on the human genome project. Weaponized diseases to fight weaponized diseases. Fire with fire. Interdepartmental drinks were shared and-"

"On with it Eugene." Rosita snapped, obviously having heard the story told a million times.

"Yes, I was in contact with my people in D.C for a while until the satellite phone ran out of batteries. I happen to know that there is an off switch for this, you flip that, and the dead stay dead." He summed up quickly and Rick once again shared a look with Negan. Rick raised an eyebrow and Negan pressed his lips together and shrugged.

"And all we have to do, is get you to D.C?" Rick questioned.

"That is the primary directive."

"Sounds easy enough to us."

* * *

**2 YEARS, 7 MONTHS OUT**

"Shit did you hear that?" Dwight sat bolt upright in the back of one of the trucks.

"No, what was it?" Sherry asked from next to him, sitting up, slower and less panicked than Dwight.

The sound came again, a cry of ' _HELP_ ' coming from somewhere in the surrounding forest, rousing several of the other members of the group.

"Let's go, come on." Arat said, getting up from where she'd decided to sprawl out sleeping.

Rosita was on watch and made her way back in towards the two trucks that they now had. It was early morning so there was a little bit of light cresting from the east. They were on coastal flat land, so there weren't a lot of mountains and the sunlight came in clearly.

"We going to check it out or what?" She asked the now very awake group of twelve people.

Rick had been half asleep leaning against one of the tires of the truck with Andy on his legs so he got up quickly and had to tell Andy to heel so he wouldn't go off after the noise by himself.

"Yeah, yes. Negan, Dwight, Arat, Rosita, with me." He called the four of them who didn't protest. There were times when Negan acted as the leader, and times when Rick did. There wasn't friction in the group over it, they all got on well and neither Negan nor Rick stepped on each others toes.

Rick pulled his gun, told everyone else to stay put, and then started into the forest with Andy leading them.

They were closer to the outer banks, shore of North Carolina now and making their way even further north towards D.C. Lori and Carl had been out of Rick's mind for a couple of weeks now as the people in his group were made his priority. He could only hope that they would have the forethought to travel north. D.C would be safe for anyone, if Shane was with them then maybe they would realize that.

The voice yelled out again for help and Rick quickened his pace, not running, but walking quickly through the underbrush and not caring about how many twigs snapped underfoot.

"Rick, maybe we should be a little more cautious about this?" Negan asked, coming in line with Rick.

"That's a kids voice Negan, can't be that old. Do you think it's a trap?" He questioned. Rick genuinely liked getting input from Negan, the man kept him steady and though they always seemed to have opposing view points, they came together in the middle on most topics.

"I don't want to think it's a trap, I have to." Negan said and Rick acquiesced by slowing down a little bit and making more sure of his footing so that he wouldn't barge in on a situation unprepared.

The team behind them wordlessly followed Rick and Negan's pace. As they grew closer though Andy took off like a bullet, running towards where another scream came from.

"Shit, ANDY!" Rick yelled after the dog but he didn't slow down, so Rick broke out into a run behind the dog. This wasn't the first time Andy had taken off like this, but usually he could get a grip on the severity and mood of a situation and act rationally. Andy didn't usually bolt in stressful situations.

The rest of the group was slower in coming and Rick was keeping a good pace on Andy, getting closer to the yelling as he did so.

When Rick finally got to the scene he saw a kid, maybe 16 or 17 on the roof of a car, desperately trying to kick undead hands away from himself and kill them at the same time.

Andy tackled one of the walkers and bit it but spit the flesh out. Rick came up and shot the walker in the head. Andy could take them down but he didn't really understand how to make them stop moving.

He pulled his gun up on about five other walkers and took one out before the rest of his group came in as well. It was easy to dispatch the walkers with so many of them, and then Dwight was helping the kid down from the roof of the car.

"Shit, thank you guys." He said and shook his head a little to get more in the moment. "They got my dad, I thought they were gonna get me too."

Dwight clapped the kid on the back, "sorry kid, we all know losing people is the worst." He said and the kid nodded sadly.

"I'm Noah by the way." He said and looked around at all the faces in Rick's group. "I'm from Richmond."

"You got a group?" Arat asked, holstering her gun and raising an eyebrow at him.

"Yeah, yeah, back home. My uncle lives in Atlanta, real survival type so we thought we go see if he was still around. But it's a lot harder to get anywhere than we thought. We left probably two months ago." He explained.

"This place, does it have walls? Lots of people?" Rick questioned, stepping in.

"It was a gated community so he didn't even have to put the walls up or nothing. And yeah, maybe fifty? Sixty? Mostly the old residents. My mom and brothers are up there too." He explained.

"It's on the way to where we're going." Negan said, trying to make is sound offhanded, but Rick knew that tone of voice. Negan wanted to do this, he wanted to get Noah home. Rick kinda wanted to as well. It wasn't often after six months in the apocalypse, that you could do something wholesome, something good, and they would have to take this opportunity. Plus if Noah really did have a big community then they could set up a base there and take Eugene to D.C with less people so they could get there quicker.

"You guys saying you'll take me home?" Noah asked, sounding a little taken aback.

"Yeah," Rick looked over at Negan who nodded at him. "Yeah we are."

* * *

**2 YEARS, 6 MONTHS OUT**

Rick picked up his walkie as the truck drew closer to Noah's home.

"We're a couple miles out. We'll find a place to stash the car and then head in." He spoke. One of the trucks was going to stay outside and one was going in. Morgan didn't want Duane going in and Abraham didn't want Eugene, so they'd put about half their group into one truck to stay behind.

Noah had said it was unnecessary, but six months into the apocalypse had taught Rick to be cautious.

In his truck were Noah, Negan, Abraham, Arat, Dwight, and Simon. He'd left Andy with everyone else simply because he scared people, and even if this whole community was gone, he wouldn't really be much of a help.

"Got it, we'll drive maybe half a mile further and then stop." Rosita's voice came over the walkie, Rick didn't bother with responding.

He drove the truck a little way into the forest and parked it near a wreck, so the truck might just look like part of it, and then everyone piled out.

They walked their way around to the front entrance and Rick listened, but he couldn't hear any noises coming from within the community. He couldn't really hear anything at all.

Noah walked up behind them, limping slightly from his barely healed wound. He'd pulled a muscle in his calf, and they'd been able to keep him off of it for a while, but he wasn't ever going to walk normal again.

Arat pushed ahead and grappled with climbing up the fence, looking out over it and acting as their scout.

"What do you see?" Rick asked her, coming up to stand next to the gate, ready to push it open. It certainly didn't seem like anyone was riding out to meet them.

"Nothing. I think it's gone." She jumped down as Rick started to push the gate open and he heard her tell Noah that she was sorry, giving him a small hug. They'd all lost people, and Rick felt bad for letting the kid get his hopes up at all.

"Let's see what we can find anyway." Negan said and Rick nodded.

When the gate was open they could see that there were a few bodies in the streets, but for the most part, there was nothing. Most of the bodies were dead dead, and walker or two ambled around mindlessly up the road.

The group entered the community and Dwight pushed the gate most of the way closed behind them. It allowed them exit, but didn't allow anything else to enter easily without warning.

Calmly, they walked down the main street. Arat took point and stealthily killed walkers with a bowie knife. Dwight and Abraham wandered near the back, they made a good and well organized team.

Everything was going well until Noah seemed to remember something and took off in the best run he could manage.

"Noah! Hey!" Rick called after him and took off. "Everyone stay back, it's fine!" He called to everyone else. He was worried Noah was having a panic attack or something and he didn't want everyone crowding around him.

Everyone seemed startled but continued on with what they were doing regardless.

Noah was moving pretty fast but Rick was able to keep just behind them until they got to a house that Noah pushed his way inside of. "Noah hey! Calm down for a minute! Take a breath." Rick tried to say to him, but Noah was already collapsed on the ground next to the body of a woman, most likely who Rick assumed was him mother.

He stood in silence behind Noah for a moment, not wanting to interrupt his moment and grief. He heard a noise from down the hall and silently slipped down it.

Noah didn't seem to hear him. Rick pulled his knife and pushed a door open into a kids bedroom, well, two kids it seemed. There was a boy dead on the floor, really dead. Rick walked over towards him, kneeling. Noah's little brother.

Rick picked up a framed photo next to him, it showed a pair of twin brothers, young and carefree looking. They looked similar to Noah and would have probably looked a lot like him if they'd gotten a chance to grow up.

He suddenly felt the skin prickle on the back of his neck, his hair raising and he turned around.

Not quick enough though as the second brother had wandered out of the room he had been milling in, and grabbed ahold of Rick's arm with one of his small, decayed hands.

Rick pulled his arm away, but the hand didn't come loose and it simply brought the walker closer to him. He wanted to call Noah for help, but didn't want to put the poor boy though having to put down his brother.

His knife was on the ground near the other twin and so, holding one hand against the walker's chest to keep it away, he reached for the knife with his other.

In a flash of a second the walker pushed off from his hand and bit down hard on his forearm. "Fuck!" Rick yelled and finally grabbed the knife, killing the walker.

"Noah we gotta go!" Rick shouted as he barreled out of the house, holding his arm at the elbow to try and stop the blood flow.

"Oh God." Noah said, his face going abnormally pale. He got up from where he was sitting and pushed the door out for Rick, running into the street and shouting for help.

Rick didn't even know what to do. Was he dead? He didn't know.

Abraham and Dwight were the first on the scene but both suddenly looked just as panicked as Noah and Rick were. They didn't know what to do any better than Rick did. No one seemed to be able to keep a level head at the moment.

Negan came running in second, as soon as he saw Rick his eyes fluttered and Rick thought for a moment that he was going to pass out-but he didn't, he pulled out his machete and took a deep breath.

"Rick get on the ground." Negan ordered and Rick immediately began to protest.

"What the fuck are you gonna do?" He asked and Negan took another breath.

"I'm gonna cut it off." He said, a little more calm than Rick could understand.

"That'll just kill him faster!" Arat yelled and Negan shook his head.

"What the fuck else are we supposed to do. Rick,  _get on the ground._ " He ordered, and with impending death looming over his head, Rick found himself getting to his knees, and then laying on his back on the asphalt.

Abraham seemed to come to his senses finally and shook his head harshly. "Arat, see if you can find something we can use to stop the bleeding." He snapped off and came up beside Rick. "I'll hold him down." He said to Negan.

Rick was starting to hyperventilate as he felt Abraham's giant hands on him. One pushed harshly down on his left shoulder and the other was holding the top of his right arm so that it angled out and Negan could get the best, cleanest cut.

Negan made eye contact with Rick and Rick could suddenly see that he wasn't calm, not at all. He was just trying to hold it together for Rick's sake. "Can I do this Rick?" He asked.

Rick hesitated for just a second before nodding. "Do it."

He scrunched his eyes closed as Negan grabbed his wrist and pulled his arm out taught. He could only barely hear the whistle of the blade through the air before his chest was convulsing off the ground in pain and he let out an ungodly loud groan of pain.

Negan didn't get it all in one clean cut, but on the second cut, Rick blacked out.

* * *

He woke up some indeterminable time later, laying on a soft bed and feeling a general throb in his right arm.

His eyes fluttered as he took in the light and bright colors around him. The room was yellow, it was dusty, and an overly bright sun was shining directly in his eyes.

As soon as his eyes were all the way open, someone was at his left side, awkwardly gripping his arm in their hands.

"Finally awake." The voice said softly and Rick placed it as Negan's voice.

"How long have I been out?" He asked and brought his right hand up to rub his eyes but Negan leaned over to push his arm back down. Rick was reminded that he no longer had a right hand, or much of a lower arm at all. It was wrapped in a white bandage but Rick assumed it was nowhere near close to being healed.

"About two days, were getting worried cause we couldn't hook you up to an IV or anything." Negan explained and Rick nodded, realizing that he was incredibly hungry and that his throat was dry.

"So that's it then, you cut off the infected part and you don't die?" Rick mumbled, more musing to himself than to Negan.

"Well I don't think we should run anymore tests, but it seems so." Negan answered.

Rick felt restless and sore so he propped himself up on his left elbow and sat up. Negan didn't seem to be stopping him, so he shifted to get up off the bed. He had trouble balancing and pushing himself up on one hand for a moment, but when he finally stood up he felt immediately better and stretched his arms above his head. He right arm was a shock every time he looked at it, but eventually he would have to get used to it. Would have to learn how to shoot left handed as well.

Andy jumped off the end of the bed as well, Rick hadn't even noticed that he was there, and pressed his nose up against Rick's stomach. Rick ruffled his hand through Andy's fur. "It's okay, good boy Andy." He said and Andy rumbled happily at the sentiment.

Negan came around to the side of the bed that Rick was at and also gave Andy a pat on the head. When Rick looked up from Andy, he was making direct eye contact with Negan.

Andy moved off to the side of the room and Negan took a step forward. Rick wasn't sure what was happening for a moment before Negan took another step forward and pulled Rick into a tight hug.

Rick was stiff for a moment, and then he put his one good arm around Negan.

"I was worried." He whispered and Rick thought about what he could say to that for a moment, but then decided that nothing needed to be said. He was content like this.

* * *

**2 YEARS, 5 MONTHS OUT**

"Why the fuck are we even doing this anymore?" Negan mumbled and Rick looked over at him sharply.

"What do you mean?"

They were at the front of the group in a large flatbed truck. Their stuff was piled into the back of it. Behind them was a small bus with the majority of their people, and another van behind that had the rest. The three car caravan had worked well for them for a while since gas was still plentiful at most stations.

"Eugene fucked us over. What does D.C have for us?" He reiterated and pop one foot up on the dashboard of the car, lighting a cigarette and cracking the window a little.

"Something." Rick shrugged.

They hadn't really talked about where they were going since Eugene had come out with his lie, but they were still headed towards D.C. So as Rick figured, they were still headed towards  _something._

"Didn't you tell me you wanted to make something?" Rick asked, recalling something that Negan had said a few months ago in the forest.

"Fuck I just don't know if I have the drive anymore." He sighed. "Want a smoke?" He offered the cigarette to Rick.

Rick nodded and in a coordinated move that the two had worked out weeks ago, Negan took the steering wheel while Rick had to use his one good hand to hold the cigarette for a moment. He took in a long drag and sighed it all out. Negan took the cigarette back.

"Look at that." Rick lifted his right arm, motioning out Negan's window towards where they could see the Washington Monument out the window in the D.C metropolitan area.

"You ever been here before?" Negan asked and Rick shook his head.

"Nope. I think we're gonna find something here though. Let's keep driving. Twenty, thirty minutes and we'll find someplace. A fence. Look for a fence." Rick suggested.

"Just a chain link?" Negan questioned and Rick was starting to get annoyed with Negan's cynicism.

"Anything. We can always reinforce a fence. It would be way harder to build one ourselves." Rick said.

Negan still seemed generally lackluster about finally being in D.C, but he looked out the window and Rick could tell he was really looking for something.

They drove ten more minutes, and then fifteen, and then Negan perked up in his seat.

"Look," he pointed out his window towards a giant grey building, surrounded by industrial complexes and a chain link fence.

"Shit." Rick mumbled and had to straight the car out from how closely he was looking at the building.

He rolled the car to a stop on the road they were on overlooking the building.

It was a manufacturing center, so there wouldn't be a lot of walkers in this portion of the town, no reason for them to have been holed up here. Plus, Washington as a whole was pretty empty. Most people had been evacuated from the city.

The two other cars stopped and Rick and Negan got out.

"Why the stop?" Abraham bellowed from his and Rosita's last car in the lineup.

"Down the hill! That grey building, with the fence around it, what do you guys think?" Rick asked the whole group as they came to stand against the guard rail next to Rick.

"With the correct fixings, that fence could be made completely impenetrable." Eugene said, and for once no one yelled at him for speaking.

Rick leaned up to whisper to Negan: "With the correct fixings, this could be  _something."_


	3. All Right Now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -The version of the Sanctuary I'm going off of is the one from the comic books. Very minimal differences, it's just easier to find pictures of the one from the comics.  
> -Also the pacing of this chapter is weird??? Sorry I'm not really satisfied with it but I couldn't figure out what I didn't like.  
> -Shane comes in the chapter after next! Almost done with the exposition :')

**2 YEARS, 5 MONTHS OUT**

Rick had his colt in his left hand as Negan was turning the knob to a door. His eyes flashed to Rick's and they both nodded at the same time. Negan pushed the door open and Rick entered the room first, ready with his gun.

He looked left and then right and didn't see any walkers in the room. Negan entered after him and rested a hand on Rick's shoulder.

"It's another apartment." Negan expressed even though that was apparent.

There were three buildings that were connected into the large complex. Two smaller ones on the sides and then the large warehouse floor in the center in the center. Rick wasn't sure what was on the left or the right. He and Negan had just reached the top of the center building, last room. Rosita and Abraham were on the other side of the floor, clearing the rest.

The huge open floor at the bottom seemed like it would be weird to ever turn into anything, but they were both surprised to find that above it was about three floors of both small and large apartments. Rick assumed it was a way to minimize on costs for the factory. Pay their workers less but offer living accommodations. That was all Rick could imagine considering that they had small kitchenettes. Only some of them had beds, it was a very shambled set up. Barely any of the rooms had any sense of personal charm to them.

This one just had a small sitting area with a couch and arm chairs, and on the other side was a kitchenette. There was another door in the corner, but it was open so he assumed it was just a bedroom or something.

"Man isn't this a sight for sore eyes." Negan admonished at the couch at dramatically collapsed onto it. Rick grinned at him and pushed Negan's feet off the end before taking a seat himself.

"I call this one." Rick mumbled and lay his head back against the cushion. Rick could honestly fall asleep on the couch right now, but he knew they had more to do today. They had to go through everything that they'd found.

Negan sat up, now really close to Rick on the small couch. Negan slung an arm over the back of the couch and Rick could just sense the presence of it behind his head and he sighed contentedly.

"I'll take the one next door." Negan finally said. That one was similar, but had nowhere near as good of a couch as this one.

"I'm actually never gonna get up again." Rick said, barely even a whisper and looked up at the ceiling. The power wasn't working, but Rick wondered if they would be able to get it back on with solar power or something. Those were thoughts for the future though.

"What you want me to wait on you then?" Negan asked jokingly and turned his head to look at Rick's subtle and delicate side profile.

"Mmm, that sounds good."

Rick looked over at Negan then, not knowing that the man was already looking at him. They were nose to nose then and it was barely even a thought when they both leaned in for a kiss.

Barely a few seconds of a kiss and then they both pulled away, just looking into each others eyes for a moment.

"You wanna go check back with everyone else?" Negan asked.

Rick let a lazy smile cover his face and nodded, "yeah, sounds good."

* * *

"Left team, what did you guys find?" Negan asked, looking towards Laura and Dwight who led that team.

"It's not much. Three levels, most of it seems to be storage, machinery. There's a lot of employee lockers and a break room. We found some canned food, but not much." Laura explained and Rick nodded.

"This building was mostly living quarters on top of the warehouse floor. They're pretty nice actually and wouldn't be nice if we fixed them up a little." Abraham said with a nod.

Negan looked to Simon lastly, who had led a team through the right side of the building. "machinery, offices. Lots of things could probably be turned into living areas."

"Looks like the only thing we're missing is a place for crops." Eugene interjected.

"Crops? You think we need to grow our own food this soon?" Dwight questioned.

"Everything has a shelf life, and by the time canned goods are going bad, we'll probably have ourselves a respectable intake of vegetables." Eugene explained in his usual deadpan voice.

"So what sounds good? Split into three teams, one stays back here, another goes out scavenging food, and a third finds farm equipment?" Rick suggested, trying to think of how they could do this the quickest.

"Yeah but it's getting late, we should probably settle in for the night. Split up into teams in the morning?" Dwight suggested.

Rick took a moment to marvel at just how great the balance of power was in their group. Everyone spoke up for themselves, advocated for what they wanted. Rick briefly wondered if everyone else in the new world was establishing this good of a communal system.

"I'll take first watch! Probably be easier with two, anyone else wanna join in?" Abraham asked, his booming voice echoing and bouncing around the warehouse.

"I'll stay awake. Anyone wanna take a second shift?" Negan offered and Rick wanted to stay up with Negan, but it was already him and Abraham.

Finally they decided that Noah and Sherry would take second watch because they were going to stay in the building in the morning.

After a little bit more talk and suring up plans, most everyone headed upstairs to both search out the place and find rooms. Rooms that they would be staying in... Maybe forever.

"Hey Negan, you want Andy to stay down here with you guys?" Rick asked, ruffling his dogs hair.

"And risk you getting scared all alone up there?" Negan joked and Rick rolled his eyes but headed up the stairs with Andy anyway. Negan had a feeling about what room he would be choosing. "See you tomorrow sunshine."

* * *

**2 YEARS, 4 MONTHS OUT**

"If everyone could please make it down to the warehouse floor for a community meeting!" Came the booming voice of Eugene through a megaphone.

Rick, Rosita, and Dwight were out front, trying desperately to wrangle two pigs into a small fenced in area.

"Who the  _fuck_ gave him a megaphone!" Rosita exclaimed as she slammed the gate shut behind the pigs.

"I tried to tell Sherry not to give it to him but she's just too fucking nice." Dwight sighed and Rick had to grin at the two of them.

"Alright, let's head in, the pigs'll be fine for a couple minutes." Rick said and they headed for the door under the stairs.

On the warehouse floor, Noah and Eugene were standing next to each other, in front of everyone else. Eugene had the brains and Noah just wanted to be helpful, so he'd been reading books on architecture and trying to get into Eugene's good graces. So far it seemed like Eugene had actually been teaching Noah a few things.

Rick stood next to Morgan and Duane. Morgan had been going on runs recently, and Duane usually hung out with Sherry and Arat who had been getting started on some of the planting and farming.

A hand appeared on Rick's shoulder as Negan came in to stand next to him. "Hey you're back!" Rick greeted and Negan squeezed Rick's shoulder before removing his hand.

They hadn't really talked about the kiss they'd had a month ago. They'd become a little closer, but they'd been pretty close since meeting each other. Always going on runs together, and just being generally affectionate.

But Rick didn't think much of it. Sure they'd kissed but, nothing since that had happened, and Rick still had a wife.  _God,_ yeah he still has a wife. Somewhere.

"Thank you all for coming. Now I know that we have only barely gotten the crops set up outside, however I propose that we, through assembling a motley of different tools and large machinery, completely demolish the left side of the building. Now--"

Noah cut him off: "What Eugene's trying to say is that we want to demolish the left side of the building. We'll use some of the inside structure to reinforce the walls, make them so you can't see through them. We'll tear up the foundation and use that area to grow crops." Noah explained, much more efficiently than Eugene could have.

"So what's gonna happen with all the rubble?" Abraham asked, his arms crossed over his chest, but not looking like he was rejecting the idea.

"I mean, it's not gonna look pretty but we'll probably push it into the alley between us and that other building. It'll stop walkers from building up there at least." Noah finished.

"And how are we going to get all these tools? Destroy the building without attracting a bunch of walkers?" Laura called.

Eugene took over the conversation. "I anticipate it'll take two dynamite blasts to get the building down to an acceptable size wherein we could take the rest out with the other machines. When we get to that point, we'll orchestrate three simultaneous blasts across town to create a larger noise. Rosita can head that up as she has experience with explosives. Our first step is getting supplies. I spotted a CAT rental store on the way into town, we could send a team of four in. We'll need a bulldozer and an excavator for the demolition. Each of those is going to need a semi truck, there should be some at the rental place, or nearby. Does anyone know how to operate heavy equipment?"

"I can drive both of those." Abraham held his hand up, offering himself.

"I've driven a backhoe before. Can't drive one anymore but I could explain it to someone" Rick offered, figuring it would be kind of similar.

"Cool, awesome. So Rick and Abraham, how about you guys go with Negan and Arat, is that good?" Noah asked and Rick nodded his head.

This all seemed kind of wild to him. He supposed he was still just living in the moment though, not really ready to think this far ahead.

"When are we heading out?" Arat asked.

"The sooner the better."

* * *

**2 YEARS, 2 MONTHS OUT**

"You ready to go Negan?" Rick asked, swinging into the mans room and holding himself in the doorframe by his one good hand.

"Yeah, one second, gotta grab the condoms for all the wild kinky fucking we'll get up to."

Rick turned beet red and huffed at the man who slung his duffel bag over his shoulder. Rick didn't know if there were or weren't condoms in there. He and Negan were still in a nebulous around one another, ever since that first kiss, they'd been close, getting closer, but shutting each other off rather soon.

They heard the sounds of a trencher backing up down on the main level. It was hard to get any other kind of work done with the constant loud noises. Walkers weren't really piling up though, surprisingly enough. It felt like there just wasn't a lot of them in this area.

From dynamite blasts to the reinforced fence starting to go up, there was no sizable increase in them.

So Rick and Negan felt like things were in control here, so they were heading out towards the coast. Scavenging and finding supplies. They were taking one of the warehouse trucks with them, it was about half the length of a semi and Rick was hopeful they would be able to fill it all the way up.

Negan slung an arm easily around Rick's shoulder and Rick hoisted his backpack up further on his back as they headed down the stairs to the warehouse floor. It was early in the morning and the communal kitchen area that they'd set up was pretty busy.

There were a motley of desks, conference tables, roller chairs, and plastic chairs filling up about a quarter of the floor and a lot of the seats were full. They'd taken in a few more people-- well actually a lot. Almost twenty people had been attracted by the sound of the dynamite. Then they just had to follow the power tools until they were here... In whatever this place was.

Dwight and some newer guy, Alden? Rick wasn't sure, were making breakfast on a few gas burners. It looked like some kind of egg-less, non dairy milk pancake.

That was another thing he and Negan were looking for, chickens. Maybe a goat if they could figure out how to get it back without it dying. They would be on more of a time limit if they found something living.

The pigs were doing well and they'd really lucked out by finding a sow that seemed to have already been pregnant since before they found her. So they would be able to expand upon what they already had.

"Breakfast Rick? Or do you wanna just get out of here?" Negan asked, motioning towards some of the open seats.

"Let's go, I have some granola bars in my bag." He explained and they stepped out the left side door of the building onto a dirt path that wove in between the large plots that already took up the area that they'd removed the concrete. They weren't growing anything yet, but Eugene was busy digging trenches were they could hopefully artificially irrigate the plots.

He and Noah were standing over a drafting table they'd picked up along the way, both scribbling away at something at the same time.

"Hey guys, out of here already?" Laura asked, carrying a mug of instant coffee in her hands and slowly sipping at it. Arat had put her to work in the farm while she wasn't out doing runs with Morgan or Abraham.

"Yeah, wanna see if we can't get to the coast by this afternoon." Rick explained and she offered him her cup but he declined with a smile.

"Oh, uh, I think Sherry was looking for you guys earlier. She should be at the plots out front." Laura pointed around the building to where their original plots had been. He was pretty sure Noah and Eugene were planning on converting that area into only animals though. He was also pretty sure that Noah and Eugene could take over the world at this point.

"Thanks!" Rick said, but before they could walk away Eugene called them over. "I'll go talk to Sherry, you see what Eugene wants." Rick said to Negan and the man nodded, and they took off in opposite directions.

It was warm outside yet, they'd passed by most of winter with minimal consequences and it was just about early summer now. Thankfully they had a really dry winter, and gas wasn't in low supply yet. However they couldn't use gas forever... But Rick was sure that Eugene was already thinking of a way around that.

Sherry was on her knees, weeding the garden. That's really what this plot was, a garden, compared to the full size farms on the other side of the building. They wanted to get one last harvest from here before turning it into a pen.

"Hey Sherry, Laura said you wanted me?" He asked, pulling his hat down on his head. Andy came running over then, from where he was standing 'guarding' the pigs.

"Yeah, yeah." She said and stood up, taking her gloves off and dusting off her knees. "Since you guys are headed towards the coast I wondered if you could make your way into the city at any point? It's just, I just, I majored in botany a hell of a long time ago, and I know that they keep heirloom seeds in the museum of natural history. Those would be really beneficial. They're not as hardy as hybrids, but they grow more plentiful and lush." She explained.

"Uh yeah, totally. What kind of seeds are we looking for?" Rick inquired.

"All kinds really. But Eugene was thinking about setting up a greenhouse, and I said I could help. So if we're going to have a sheltered area with controlled temperature maybe grab some fruits or berries? Blueberries, strawberries, even a pear tree would be great." She explained and Rick nodded.

"Thanks, we'll keep that in mind. It might be hard to get into the city on this run, just because we're taking the big truck. But that will be a great place to hit later if we can't this time." Rick explained and Sherry nodded at him with a thankful smile.

He wandered on back towards the truck and saw Negan was already putting his bag inside. Rick thought it was crazy how so many people had become so integral to this new society. Sherry sounded like she wasn't even using her botany degree, and here she was in the middle of the apocalypse,  _helping_ everyone.

Rick wondered where exactly he and Negan fit in, really. They were looked to as leaders, they made most of the decisions, but that was about it. He didn't even really know why people looked to them for direction.

"Hey what did Eugene want?" Rick asked, climbing into the cab and putting his back pack on the floor. Negan took over driver, starting the truck up as some people opened the gate for them.

"Wanted me to see if I could snag any books on  _solar_ _power._ Wants to get this whole place running on a grid soon." Negan said, with a bit of a chuckle, and Rick had to grin at that too. A couple months ago they'd all wanted to kill Eugene, and they were fucking lucky that they didn't.

"Oooof course he does." Rick said and propped one of his boots up on the dash, reaching over to press the button for the CD player, letting Johnny Cash blast through the cab and draw walkers away from home.

They drove in relative silence for a while, just taking in the scenery around them. Rick had never been in a state with this kind of plant life, it was pretty. Different. He liked it.

As the sun started to crest high above them, Rick finally turned the CD down, now well into its fourth rotation.

They hadn't made a stop yet, they'd decided to write down places they were thinking of stopping at, make their way to the coast, and then work their way back. That would take the least gas at least.

"Did you have a wife?" Risk asked, pulling a granola bar out of his back pack and opening it with his one hand and his teeth, suddenly hungry.

Negan shrugged and flipped the question back around: "Did you?"

Rick decided not to question why Negan hadn't answered and instead nodded. "Yeah, Lori. That's why Morgan and I were headed North in the first place. We thought that she would have been evacuated this direction. Never did find her though." Rick answered and ate about half the bar before handing the other half to Negan, who refused it.

"What was she like?"

"Sweet, a little bitchy. I met her while I was in the academy. Never really knew another woman. We had a son Carl and she was pregnant when this all happened." Rick rolled his window up so that he could feel the effects of the air conditioning, cooling his ripe skin.

"How old's Carl?" Negan reached his hand over to fiddle with the AC for a second, and then lightly, smoothly, set his right hand on Rick's knee. Neither one of them mentioned it. Rick liked the comfort.

"He was eight. Be around nine or so now. He was sweet, real smart. I think,  _hope_ that Shane kept a watch over both of them. He's my old partner from the department. Kind of a prick, but he knew his way around a gun." Rick nodded and suddenly Andy, who was taking up the right window seat of the bench style seat, decided to turn himself around so that his head was on Rick's lap. But for a dog bigger than most children, that took quite an effort, and quite a lot of stepping on Rick's legs.

"I'm sure he did. Who knows? Maybe there's two little Rick Grimes out there somewhere." Negan squeezed Rick's knee and Rick rested his left hand over Negan's, content.

A few more minutes of silence, Rick almost swore he could see water on the horizon.

Then he really did see something out of the corner of his eye. A person, darting between the trees and out of view of Rick and Negan. "Hey there was someone there!" Rick pointed towards the tree line and Negan rolled the truck to a stop.

"We going to check it out?" He asked, hand on the gear shift and ready to shift it into park.

"What do you think?"

"Fuck yeah." And Negan parked the car and took the keys out, pocketing them. He grabbed his rifle and Rick grabbed his python, both of them exiting the car with Andy in tow.

Rick felt like they were back in the Carolina's, talking about what animals you could and couldn't eat as soon as they entered the tree line. Rick took the middle, right behind Andy's vanguard.

Negan was just a few paces behind.

"Someone out there?" Negan called, as unafraid as always.

They heard another rustling, this one from further up and straight ahead of them, and then muted voices. Whispers floating downwind towards them.

"You got guns?" A voice called through the forest.

"Yep, and I bet you do too." Rick answered, all the while never stopping his advance with Negan. "Doesn't mean I wanna use 'em." He added.

"Will you put them down so we know you won't hurt us?" The disembodied voice called again, closer.

"Nope. I'll give you my word." Rick responded and stopped in his tracks, feeling he was close enough to the people, and not wanting them to run off. "You guys got a community?"

"Maybe." The voice responded.

"Why don't you come out and we can talk. Won't shoot, promise."

After a few long moments two people walked out. One looked to be about fifteen or sixteen, the other, a male, a little younger. They looked similar in appearance though, dark skin and dark hair.

"I'm Rick, this is Negan. And over there is Andy." He motioned to the dog that was now sitting on his haunches and looking very not intimidating.

"I'm Cyndie. This is my brother Clyde." She said, pushing him behind her a little. "Do you guys have a community?"

"We do. We have walls, crops, animals. What about you guys?"

"We don't have walls. We have a system to push them away... And we eat fish. A lot of fish." She explained and rung her hand on the strap of her satchel that she was wearing.

"You wanna maybe take us back to whoever's in charge? We can talk more." Rick suggested and Cyndie looked like she was struggling with what the right answer would be. Rick could tell that she wanted to, but seemed unsure of whether or not that would be the smartest move.

"We'll give up our weapons once we enter." He promised and finally she nodded, just a shallow bob of her head.

Negan looked over at Rick, raising an eyebrow and Rick shrugged. He didn't see any reason not to trust Cyndie, and if this turned out to be legit, they could probably sketch out a good trade deal.

"How'd you lose your arm?" The younger boy, maybe eleven, asked.

"Clyde that's  _rude._ " Cyndie emphasized and smacked his on the shoulder.

"No, no, It's fine. I was bit. We had to take it off." Rick explained and then Cyndie suddenly forgot about it being 'rude' and wanted to know the whole story.

He filled her in as they walked and Negan kept a watchful eye on the forest with Andy, both of them keeping their  _person_ safe.

When they reached the perimeter of the encampment they were met with men who also had guns, and Cyndie having to vouch for the both of them. One man took their guns and Negan rested a hand on Rick's shoulder as they both walked. Rick could tell that Negan was feeling uneasy about this all, but there was no way they would reach out to other communities without taking a few risks.

"It's my grandmother who's in charge. Her name's Natania." Cyndie explained and brought them into a beach style hut.

A woman sat at a dining room chair, raising her eyebrows at the two new men.

"Cyndie, who have you brought?" She asked, looking up at her. Natania certainly didn't look much like Cyndie, but Rick could kind of see a resemblance.

"This is Rick and Negan. They're from another community."

Natania motioned for them to both take seats. "Another community?" She reiterated. "I didn't really think their was such a thing." She mused and Rick nodded.

"We didn't either. This is just as much of a surprise to us. We thought that everywhere else turned out like the refugee camps." Rick explained and crossed one leg over the other, resting his good hand on the leg. Negan was dis-similarly spread out, his knees wide apart and arms on the back of the chair, one of them reaching over to Rick's chair. Andy was standing beside Rick.

"Well welcome to Ocean Side I suppose. I doubt we have anything you'd want."

"You have fish. That's pretty important, a good source of protein at least." Rick remembered from what Cyndie had told him.

"We have to dry it, and the salting process makes it lose most of its nutritional value."

"We're putting in solar panel at the, the  _Sanctuary,_ we'd be able to freeze it. Maybe we could get solar panels here." Rick came up with a name for home on the spot. They'd never discussed it, but Negan had once referred to it as his sanctuary, so it seemed to fit. And he was also wildly extrapolating on the solar panels things, who even knew if Eugene could do that.

"But that would be a while. Until then we could only give you dried or pickled." She bartered. "But we would need more than solar panels in return for fish. We could probably even put those in ourselves."

"Vegetables! By July we'll have our first harvest in. We might be able to make a prosciutto from our hogs, or at least give you another kind of dried meat. Maybe a whole hog if the fishing turns out well." Rick countered and Negan squeezed Rick's shoulder. This is what Rick was good at. Negan was good at bossing people around, and Rick was good at negotiating.

Natania sat back in her seat for a moment in thought, and then rocked forward for a moment. "You promise you aren't pulling a fast one on me?"

"Promise. We could show you guys how to make your own salt too, since you're so close to the ocean. White table salt goes bad, sea salt never will." Rick suggested.

"Why don't you boys stay for dinner, and we'll do some more talking?"

* * *

The next morning, with two crates full of dry fish, Negan and Rick started their long drive back to the Sanctuary. They also had a loose deal written down that they had titled the  _Oceanside - Sanctuary Concord._ It seemed a little fancy, but Natania had pushed it that they needed their agreement in writing. So it had a general set of guidelines detailing what kind of provisions each community would provide, and was signed by both Rick and Natania.

"I'd say we're doing pretty damn good so far." Rick said, looking over at Negan.

"Yeah totally."

"You haven't been very talkative recently." Rick noted as Negan rolled the truck to a stop outside of a lone convenience station in the middle of nowhere.

"You're good at all that negotiating stuff. Really good. I feel like I just get angry with people, so I wanted to let you do all the talking. Plus your voice is sexy."

Rick rolled his eyes as he got out of the car, leaving Andy asleep on the seat. He'd had a long night of playing with some kids from Oceanside. Rick liked the place, he'd even offered for them to just all come back to the Sanctuary at one point, but they felt safe at Oceanside. And Rick respected their sovereignty.

He held his gun in his left hand, heading towards the locked store doors with Negan.

Negan knocked a few times on the door before grabbing a crow bar off the ground and roughly shattering the bottom half of it, making enough room for him and Rick to crawl in, but nothing else.

Light filtered into the store dimly, but it was clean and definitely hadn't been ransacked. Which was good, that was beginning to become a more and more rare sight as the months waged on.

I'll head this way, you go that?" Negan pointed his hands in opposite directions, crossing his arms over his chest and Rick nodded, heading towards the long warm coolers with water in them.

That was one thing that they needed often, water. The Sanctuary had its own well, but Eugene wanted to look closer at the pipes and make sure it was safe for drinking, but the man was so busy he hadn't actually gotten around to it, so they'd been mostly drinking bottled water.

He pulled all five of the large packs out of the cooler and piled them on the ground next to himself. He looked across the store to see Negan standing with an open pringles can, looking at a copy of some porno he'd snatched from behind the counter.

"Taking your lunch break?" Rick joked and Negan dropped the magazine with a shit eating grin, popping a pringle in his mouth.

"Gotta have something to get my rocks off to." He joked and set the chips tube down before heading towards Rick, noticing the palates of water that Rick had somehow drug out with only one hand. "Nice work officer." He congratulated.

Rick leaned himself against the glass door of the cooler and smirked at Negan. "Better than you."

Negan took a step forward, getting closer to Rick.

"You know, maybe I just need your beautiful face to get my rocks off."

Rick groaned in annoyance and disgust. "Wow you almost said something genuinely nice." He rolled his eyes.

Rick was about to move away when Negan rested a hand on the side of his face, locking him into place. "Sorry." He mumbled, but was grinning and Rick could tell he wasn't really sorry.

Rick brought up his hand to rest over Negan's, gently.

And then Negan leaned in and placed his lips over Ricks, and it was so different from that distant first kiss. Rick felt his stomach flutter and he wished that he had another hand to bring up to touch Negan's face with. Negan seemed to sense this, so he used his right hand to hold onto the top of Rick's arm, pushing it back against the glass as he pushed one leg in between Rick's.

Negan cupped Rick's jaw and tilted his head back a bit, moving his lips harder against Rick's and trying to speed things along.

They were cut off by a bark outside where they could see a walker clawing at the closed door to the truck.

Negan pulled back a little and rested his forehead against Rick's. "Good thing I brought those condoms."

Rick playfully smacked Negan and went to check on his dog.


	4. As I Lay Dying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one's a little shorter and more dialogue driven, but you get a fun sneak peak at the end!! :)

**1 YEAR, 8 MONTHS OUT**

Six months since their merger with Oceanside and things at the Sanctuary were going well.

Rick and Negan had just brought back over a hundred pounds of fish, frozen in a power chiller that Eugene was using as a cooler until he figured out how to solar power a transportable one.

The roof of the Sanctuary was now covered in panels that Noah had actually been instrumental in setting up. Eugene was busy making the wall bigger and more secure so he'd basically set Noah loose on the roof for a couple of months with a small team, and they'd actually done it. Noah was actually currently at Oceanside with a couple of newer people to the Sanctuary, figuring out how they were going to set up solar power there.

Cyndie had turned seventeen a couple of months ago and Natania let her be a go between for Sanctuary and Oceanside. She was level headed, cool, Rick liked her.

He was standing near the gate currently, watching Negan approach through the crops with two plates in his hands.

It was nearing late September and they weren't getting many more crops for the rest of the year. Snowfall wouldn't happen until December, but they didn't want to lose any produce in a flash freeze. Plus they had a surplus that they would be able to keep stored in a cellar until the spring.

At least this winter they would have a better source of heat, not just flimsy and sparse space heaters.

"Brought you lunch!" Negan called and handed Rick a plate of what looked to be salad. Mixed greens, tomato, some of their freshly made goat cheese. They'd recently had a person join their group named Eastman, had wandered up from down South and was pretty close to perfecting goat cheese.

Rick took a tentative bite. It was definitely better than his first batch of cheese.

"Thanks." Rick said through a mouthful of food, nodding at Negan.

"How'd you wind up on gate duty? You run this place." Negan joked and Rick rolled his eyes.

"I don't run this place,  _yet._  We'll finish tallying the votes once Abe and Rosita get back." He said and stuffed another bunch of lettuce into his mouth, suddenly starving.

They were doing a completely fair vote now that the Sanctuary had over sixty people at it. It just seemed like the right thing to do since most of the new people didn't even understand why Rick was in charge. Rick didn't really understand why he was put in charge.

So he'd gone up against Simon and a woman named Regina. Rick wasn't really sure if anything was going to change though, because he'd already been co-in charge with Negan so people were used to him, they weren't used to Simon or Regina.

Rick had talked with Dwight and Sherry a little about it over dinner and they'd voiced concerns over how violent Simon had been during that time that they knew him on the road.

"Like you're gonna lose the vote." Negan rolled his eyes and Rick shrugged, surveying over everyone who was outside, still taking in the last few warm months before it would get cold.

Morgan was standing near the front, off to the side of the animal pens with Duane and Eastman. Learning some new kind of fighting style. Rick wasn't interested, but it made Morgan a lot faster in combat with the dead, and better at going on runs.

Sherry was in her greenhouse, he could only see her silhouette, and Dwight was bringing a wheelbarrow of mulch in to her. Laura and Alden were sitting rather close on one of the benches, taking a break from weeding. Eugene was pointing some of the stronger men around by the walls, telling them what to do. Arat, in charge of the crops now, was surveying everyone else as well.

"It's up to them." Rick went back to his salad, finishing it in a few more bites and setting his plate on the guard post table by the gate and leaning back against it. Rosita and Abraham were supposed to get back in the morning, but it was starting to crest on midday now.

As if on cue to Rick's thoughts, the sound of a vehicle rumbling outside of the gates started to become audible and he motioned for Negan to help him with the fence.

They pulled it open together and a vehicle,  _much_ larger than the one that they had set out with rolled into the compound, the gate shut behind them.

The pulled the car into an area that was still mostly for cars, away from the farms and such.

Rick walked over towards them, wondering what they could have brought back that would require them to get a completely new car.

Abraham jumped out of the car with his usual pomp and circumstance. "Rick, you are not going to fucking  _believe_ what we found out there. find of a century, come around back." He announced and Rick grinned at him as Rosita joined them outside of the huge truck, almost a semi, and towards the roll door on the back.

"This," she said, hand on the handle to open it. "Is definitely gonna change things around here." She pulled the door up and revealed three anti-aircraft machine guns. Along with what seemed to be boxes of bullets.

"Is that what I fucking think it is?" Negan asked, pulling himself into the truck.

"If you think it's a mountable anti-aircraft turret-sorry  _three_ mountable anti-aircraft turret machine guns, then yeah." Abraham pulled out the ramp on the semi truck and got in there with Negan.

"So what are we gonna do with these?" Rick asked, marveling as Negan grabbed the gun part of it and Abraham grabbed the tripod that held it. Both of them definitely didn't make carrying them easy.

"Figure Eugene can get them on the wall, or in some of the windows maybe? Just in case a big group of them passes through. And we gotta talk about exactly that, a big group." Rosita explained, jumping back out of the truck.

"Can we talk right here?" Rick asked.

Rosita looked around, perturbed by the large amount of people. "No, let's get Dwight, Laura, Morgan, Eugene, and Noah together. We need to keep this tight." She explained and Rick nodded, rubbing his face.

"Alright, you gather everyone up. Sherry's gonna talk to you guys about the  _election_ at some point. You're the only ones we're waiting for then she's gonna count the ballots. I'll meet you guys in the council room."

Rosita pulled the back of the truck down and nodded.

Rick grabbed Negan's forearm with his good hand and looked up at him. "What do you think they mean by that?" He asked, starting to walk back towards the building. The  _council room_ was just what used to be a board room, with a long table and actually matched chairs at it. It was one of the nicer rooms that hadn't been left in a disarray and was actually pretty nice. They'd been using it to have meeting talking about big problems and such.

Negan thought for a moment as they walked, passing by people who greeted and smiled at them. "Sounds like maybe everything isn't going to keep going peachy for us."

They were silent for another moment longer as Rick surveyed the cafeteria that was now also partly just a community room. The warehouse still felt a little empty, cold.

"You really think I can be a leader? An  _elected_ official?" He questioned, raising an eyebrow at Negan as they started up the stairs.

"You already were our leader."

"No, you  _and_ I were leaders. And fucking everyone else. We all made decisions." Rick countered.

"And we'll all keep giving you shit, and call you out when you make a bad decision." Negan promised and then when they were up the stairs, in a lonely corridor where no one was walking, Negan pushed him back against the wall gently, putting one hand on the side of Rick's face and the other on his hip.

"What if all of my decisions are bad?" Rick asked, tipping his head back a little and leaning it into Negan's palm.

Negan rested his forehead against Rick's. "Sweetheart, all of your decisions are already terrible. We just didn't have the heart to tell you."

Rick laughed, long and hard, and shoved Negan off of him playfully.

Negan just pressed him harder into the wall and gripped him behind the head and by the chin with his thumb, bringing his lips up, a little forcefully, to Negan's.

When he pulled away finally he pressed a kiss against Rick's jaw. "You're doing great. Way better than I would. I think I would just fucking kill anyone that had what I wanted." He said and nipped at Rick's jaw.

"No you wouldn't. You're a good man." Rick protested but their conversation was cut off by Negan kissing him again.

Rick smiled into the kiss, almost breaking it with his big grin, but Negan just reached around to grip his ass and then Rick was kissing him back.

"Aw yuck. S'like seeing your parents kiss." Noah protested as he came up the stairs and into the hallway with Eugene and Laura in tow. Laura gave them a smile, Eugene just looked like he was watching intently.

"Your totally super hot parents." Negan joked and Rick pushed him away for real, looking embarrassed.

"Let's just get to this meeting." He said as his cheeks turned red.

Finally in the council room, almost all the seats full, Rick motioned to Rosita and Abraham to speak first.

Rosita stood up and seemed to be thinking of exactly what to say for a moment. "Abraham and I today, we found these three guns. Big guns, mountable anti aircraft guns. We loaded them up into a truck we'd found and we were gonna go further out. Head North towards McClean, but we couldn't get up on interstate 495 because there were so damn many of the dead. I know we've seen them in groups of thirty, forty. But this was... It was a hundred at least."

"I would say a couple hundred." Abraham interjected. "And they were headed South."

"You say they were on the 495 headed south?" Dwight questioned, leaning forward with both elbows on the table.

Rosita sat back down and simply nodded.

"Well fuck. That's it, we're done." Dwight said, suddenly leaning back, in disbelief.

"How fast were they moving, any idea?" Noah asked.

Rosita shook her head, with a shrug. Abraham spoke up: "they seemed a little slower than usual. It didn't seem like they were headed south for any reason. Just kind of shambling along."

"What have we got then? Three days? Four?" Morgan asked.

Rick raised both of his eyebrows and crossed one leg over the other.

"Can we draw them away?" Negan suggested. "You said they didn't seem to be headed South for a reason, does that me we could create a loud noise and get them to go another direction."

"The amount of manpower and tools we currently have at our disposal, would make that a negatory for trying to draw them away. We don't have any dynamite left."

"We found the dynamite in the first place, are you sure there isn't any left from that place?" Laura asked. Only Rosita and Dwight had gone on the run, because they were the only ones that had explosives experience.

Eugene didn't have a response to that, everyone just looked to Dwight and Rosita. Rosita scrunched her face up a little. "Well..." She began but couldn't seem to figure out what she wanted to say.

"Technically." Dwight added.

"Technically?" Risk questioned.

"We got all of the product Eugene wanted and then some. We couldn't fit all the crates in the car and so we had set eight sticks on the seat in Dwight's lap. About halfway here we both got kinda freaked out by having it sitting in the heat instead of in the shade of the boxes, so we piled the sticks in the seat of a car we passed, thinking we could come back for them eventually, we never did." Rosita finally forced out.

"Great, we'll go back for them." Laura said, nodding.

"We can't." Noah said quickly. "If they weren't kept in a cool place then they're completely useless. It's been over ninety degrees a lot this summer and dynamite sweats-nitroglycerine. They're completely unstable now, if they haven't exploded already."

" _Well,_ we only need one stick. If we wrap it in a wet rag and don't jostle it  _at all_ then it should be fine." Eugene said, but even he looked a little perturbed by his plan.

" _That_ is a suicide mission." Morgan quickly interjected.

"It's suicide to have this herd pass right by us. We only have about 70% of the wall reinforced with the concrete and metal sheets, and the 30% that isn't finished is the south side behind the building." Noah shook his head and took in a deep breath. "I'll do it, I'll carry the dynamite."

"No, no, it should be me. I'm the one who suggested it."

"Eugene you shake just thinking about danger. I'll do it."

"Not letting my lady to that. I can stay steadier than a monkey's left nut."

"I brought dynamite up in the first place. Let me."

"Everyone shut up. I'll decide who carry's the dynamite." Rick said, waving his hand and watching them all shut their mouths. "It's me. I'm doing it."

"Whoever does it is gonna need two hands. Can't grip it, gotta gently apply pressure with your fingers on each side." Eugene interjected.

The room was an uproar again of people trying to volunteer for this death mission.

Abraham slammed his hand down on the table, making everyone quiet. "I'm doing it. Now let's get fucking going. This needs to happen  _soon_ or else it's just gonna draw more walkers to our area. Dwight, can you drive me to where you left the dynamite now? Noah you come with, you seem to know what this stuff is all about."

Rick stood up. "You guys take the honda, get going as soon as possible. Laura, you take Arat and Morgan up to Chesterbrook and look for a battery powered sound system, some of these triple A's have still got juice in them. Set the stereos up in McClean and we'll see if we can't try to get some of them started back. Negan, Rosita, Simon, and I will head up the interstate and block the offramps so they can't splinter off and head towards Oceanside."

* * *

"Jesus  _fuck_! I don't know if I can do this for much longer." Abraham's stomach was clenched uncomfortable as his fingers sat like they were in a chinese finger trap. The joints were starting to ache as he kept the stick of dynamite wrapped in a drying cloth between them.

"Just a little longer Abe please." Noah said from the front seat, leaning back.

"Holy fuck! Abe brace your legs on the back of the seat!" Dwight shouted as he had to slam on the breaks to the car. "Oh this is bad, this is really bad."

"What's going on? What's happening?" Abraham called in a panic from the back seat, finally opening his eyes. There was road work going on up ahead, and usually they would have plowed right through it and been fine, but the ground was all broken up and it would cause a ridiculously bumpy ride.

"We have to walk. Alright, Abraham I'm going to open the door for you. When you get out of the car, step only on the toe of your foot. Toe, heel, toe, heel? Got it?" Noah asked, turning around in his seat to make eye contact with Abraham.

The man gulped but then nodded and Noah got out of the car, opening the door for Abraham, who very gently got out of the car.

"Maybe one of you should take it, I've the gracefulness of a goddamn bull in a china shop."

"No, let's get moving. Look at this, Rick team has already been through here, maybe we'll find them. Until then we have to walk. Abraham you're the biggest, when you take a step the shock distributes better through your body so the dynamite is staying fairly steady." Noah explained.

Abraham took a step and felt mighty stupid with the way he was walking, but he did feel like his steps were lighter.

"Are we almost there?" Abraham asked as soon as he took a step onto the broken ground of the road construction, having to clench the muscles in his thighs to make the least impact.

"The horde is still above us, I don't see an end yet." Dwight answered. They were directly below the interstate now, on a surface street in one of the towns. They would go a while past the herd, set the dynamite down and then throw a molotov cocktail at it, then book it.

About halfway through the construction which was supposed to be 3/4 of a mile, they heard the rumbling of hooves on the ground.

"Abe get on the dirt!" Noah commanded and Abraham immediately stepped off of the road and onto the grass next to the sidewalk. Noah and Dwight drew their weapons.

A horse came into sight, then another. Two horses were barreling towards them with riders.

"STOP!" Dwight shouted at the top of his lungs, waving his arms.

"STOP!" Noah also yelled, jumping up and down on the asphalt. The shockwaves from the horses were making the ground shake, it was miniscule, but they didn't want to take any chances.

The horses stopped about twenty feet from them and the two riders got off their horses. One as a blonde woman and the other was a large dark haired man.

"We saw you driving a mile back. What happened to the car?" The woman asked, pulling her gun but keeping it by her side and walking a few paces towards them.

"Why were you watching us?" Dwight asked, not putting his gun down.

"Put the gun down then we'll talk. I'm Dianne. This is Jerry." She introduced herself.

Dwight lowered his gun slightly, narrowed his eyes, and then lowered it all the way. Noah did too. "I'm Dwight, this is Noah, and Abraham."

"What's Abraham holding?" Jerry questioned.

"Dynamite, rotten dynamite. We have to be incredibly careful with it. We're trying to draw the horde away." Noah explained and Abraham just nodded his head.

"That's what we were trying to do. So what, you're gonna explode it and hope they all turn around?" Diane raised an eyebrow.

"That's the plan."

Diane and Jerry looked at each other for a moment and then nodded. "We have a car up the road, just an emergency car we keep around here. No promises it works but we could drive you. These your people that blocked the offramps?" She asked.

"Yeah, that was us."

"Sounds like you have a lot of manpower. Let's get this job done and then talk more. Jerry and I will head up the road and drive the car down to the edge of the road construction." Diane offered.

"Yeah sounds good." Noah nodded and waited for them to be a ways ahead before telling Abraham to step back onto the pavement and start walking again.

When they finally got out of the road construction, a pick up truck was idling waiting for them.

Jerry got out of the passengers seat and Dwight helped Abraham climb in without use of his hands. Diane opened the large window that separated the back of the truck from the cab.

"You guys have a community then?" Diane asked as she got the car moving, taking care to go slow and avoid any areas that looked like they would be bumpy.

"We do. About sixty people now." Noah said.

"Us too, but I think we just hit 71." Jerry nodded.

They drove in silence past that, not really knowing what to say to each other but being thankful that they'd found each other since they could help each other out.

Every overpass they got to was blocked and they could see an end to the walkers in sight.

"Let's go past the horde a little. The overpasses should all be finished. Our people will hear the dynamite and clear the area."

So they kept driving until they saw a car headed their way on the road. "Slow down a bit Diane. That's one of ours." Dwight knocked on the window to make sure he got her attention.

When they got next to each other, both cars were at a stop. This one had Rick and Negan in it who rolled down their window so they could talk.

"Abraham?" Rick asked from his position in the drivers seat, able to see the man passed Diane.

"Yeah, we had to ditch the car a while back found these guys and they gave us a ride. They got a community around here." Noah answered, leaning forward from the back of the truck.

"I'm Rick." Rick reached up and shook Diane's hand.

"He's in charge." Noah added.

"We should talk after we get the dynamite out of this crazy son of a bitch's hands."

"Yeah, yeah we should."

* * *

"You ready?" Negan asked, hand on the door that they were told would lead into where "King" Ezekiel was apparently waiting for them.

Rick shook his head but then nodded. "Yeah. Can't be harder than rerouting hundreds of walkers."

Negan pulled the door open and they stepped in. Jerry stood at the front, off to the side behind a chair where a man sat.

Rick and Negan both visibly recoiled when they noticed the  _tiger_ that lounged comfortably on the stage. Ezekiel let out a booming laugh. "Please come forward, Shiva means you no harm... Unless you mean her harm."

Negan looked over to Rick and raised an eyebrow, Rick just nodded at him and they headed up towards the stage.

"I'm Rick Grimes. This is Negan. We're from the Sanctuary." He introduced, stopping about three feet away from the steps that led up to the stage.

"Yes, Diane and Jerry told me of your arrival. Most joyous that you were able to divert the herd away from us. I'm King Ezekiel," he stood up, a flourish of extravagant clothing.

"We're still in disbelief that we even pulled that off." Rick said, a friendly smile on his face. He really didn't like having to do stuff like that, it was just going to be the same conversation he'd had with Natania at Oceanside copy and pasted.

But since he'd officially been elected as the 'leader' of the Sanctuary he kind of felt like he had to do this. Whatever 'leader' meant anyway.

They talked for an incredibly long time about barely anything at all and by the time Negan and Rick were shown out and taken to where they would be staying the night, it was dark out.

They would ride back in the morning and tell everyone about how they would be getting some new animals for the farm and a few winter stocks of crops that they hadn't been able to grow.

The woman who showed them to their rooms gave them two different ones, but they quickly decided that they would simply share one of them. It wasn't specifically because of their relationship, even if Rick had been here with Morgan he probably would have suggested that they share just in case something happened. They couldn't be too cautious.

As soon as she was gone, Rick pulled Negan along into his room and shut the door behind them, turning the lock.

"That guy almost made me just fucking die." Negan complained and sprawled himself dramatically back on the bed, hearing it creak aggressively under his weight.

"I think he was nice." Rick laid himself on the bed next to Negan, snuggling up under his arm and against his chest.

"He was  _weird._ " Negan protested and reached his other hand across his chest to softly ministrate his fingers against Rick's chest.

"You're weird." Rick said softly and rolled over, hooking on leg over Negan's and leaning up to press a soft, light kiss against Negan's jaw.

Negan didn't respond, just reached down to where Rick's thigh was on top of his leg and ran his hand up it, squeezing tightly on the firm flesh. Rick shivered a little at the feeling and pressed more airy kisses to Negan's neck.

Negan moved his hand to the belt of Rick's pants and was able to get it undone with just one hand, as his other arm was underneath Rick.

After a few moments Negan pulled Rick's hardening length out of his pants and gripped his hand tightly around it.

"Were you ever married?" Rick asked, suddenly, and non-sequitur.

"Was I ever  _what?_ Not really the time for those kinds of questions." Negan responded, not loosening his grip on Rick as Rick shallowly bucked his hips up into Negan's hand.

Rick didn't asked again just made a  _hmm_ ing sound and scooched up at little on the bed so that he could kiss Negan properly.

When Rick pulled away for a second to nip at Negan's ear lobe, Negan said: "her name was Lucille and she died shortly after everything happened."

Rick didn't respond to that, simply clutched at the fabric of Negan's shirt as he felt his orgasm approaching.

When he finally finished, white liquid all over Negan's hand, but thankfully not on the bedspread, Rick spoke. "Thank you for telling me." He said, softly.

Negan didn't speak about his past often, but Rick yearned to know more about the man that captivated him so.

* * *

**2 YEARS OUT**

**another perspective**

"Is someone gonna get that baby?" Came a disgruntled yell from somewhere in the cell block.

Judith was still crying, it's not like complaints would make her stop.

"Sorry, I'm trying!" Carl called back, bouncing her on his knee and cooing softly to her.

There was a soft rapping knock on the wall outside of his cell, and then Maggie appeared with a tired look on her face. "Want me to take her?" She asked, coming in to sit next to Carl.

"No, I can figure it out myself. I'm gonna have to be able to take care'a her." Carl protested and went right back to trying to quiet her down.

"Let me just hold her for a minute." Maggie offered and finally Carl nodded, handing Judith ever and then dramatically laying back on the bed, glad to be free for a few short minutes. He didn't want Maggie to take her for the night though, he really did have to learn to take care of her, especially since her mom wasn't around anymore.

Everyone was being great in helping him raise Judith. Maggie had even basically offered to just take her own as her own, but Carl had declined. He was the only real family Judith had left, and he would be the one to keep her safe.

Daryl, Maggie, Michonne, and Glenn helped a hell of a lot. And Carol when she wasn't going on runs and getting away from what was quickly turning into a hell hole.

Carl was scared for what would happen to this place. Shane was running it into the ground, people were already leaving even with nowhere else to go. Carl had half a mind to leave himself, but he didn't know if everyone would come with him. Some people still thought that Shane was a good leader.

Finally Judith stopped crying and Maggie stood up, setting her in the crib. "I think she's asleep. You sure you don't want Glenn and I to watch her tonight?" She offered again.

"I'll be fine now that she's asleep. Thanks Maggie."

Before she left, Maggie pulled him into a tight hug and Carl was able to release a breath he'd been holding. "It's all gonna work out little Grimes."


	5. In the Hall of the Mountain King

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)

**1 YEAR, 4 MONTHS OUT**

**rick**

"Hey go around behind! To the left!" Arat called as she closed in on the two large dairy cows that they were desperately trying to get into the pen that Noah had just finished building.

Rick had a slight pep in his step as he switched positions to get on the other side of the cow, but the two were slow moving and most of the trouble was actually getting them to move at all.

"God  _come on_!" Rick shouted at the cows who were now standing about a foot away from the entrance into their pen. The only reason they even needed a pen was so that Noah could finish with tearing up the asphalt around all the animals and trying to grow some kind of grass hay on it so that they could graze instead of having to be fed everyday.

With one final shove on the haunches the cows finally stepped over into the pen and Rick dramatically fanned himself with hat and leaned against the wooden fence.

"Thanks for the help Rick!" Arat said, flashing him a huge smile.

He nodded at her, "yeah, I'm glad that we found these guys."

Arat took off after that and Rick rifled through his pockets, looking for a handkerchief to wipe the sweat off of his brow.

He saw Negan strolling along the fence, holding a mug in his hands. His hair was all messed up and he looked like he'd just woken up-he probably had since it was still pretty early and Rick had left him sleeping.

Rick raised his hand up and Negan took notice of him, cracking a smile and heading over towards him. "Been looking for ya! Jesus just got here a couple of minutes ago." Negan explained as Rick reached expectantly for the cup of coffee and Negan let him take it. Their coffee had been perpetually getting more disgusting and old tasting, but Rick didn't mind, still woke him up all the same.

"Hm, did he bring that good pancake mix?" Rick asked hopefully and put his slightly damp hat back on his head.

"If he didn't I'm gonna go get you some myself so you can stop talking about it all the fucking time." Negan complained, but had an easy smile on his face as he said it. Negan dug his hand deep into his pocket and pulled out something that Rick hadn't seen in a long time.

It was his sheriff's badge, it had been buried deep in one of his drawers, underneath the neatly folded uniform. "Can I have this?" Negan asked, breaking Rick from his thoughts.

"Uh, why?" Rick finally asked after thinking for a moment.

"A surprise!" Negan responded and leaned in to press a gentle good morning kiss against Rick's lips and slipped the badge back into his pocket. He pulled away after a moment and had to immediately lean in for just one more kiss.

"Can't say no to that."

* * *

**carl**

_BOOM!_  Carl jumped backwards and clutched his sister tighter to his chest. "Fuck!" He shouted and hitched his backpack tighter on his shoulders, cradling Judith's head as he ran out of the prison cell block.

"Carl!" He heard a voice yell and saw Michonne standing with a rifle, pointing it blindly in the direction of the Governor and his men and firing while waving him towards her.

Carl turned his back to the Governor as he ran towards Michonne, making sure that if he was shot they wouldn't hit Judith.

They hadn't been prepared for an attack like this, hadn't thought about maybe The Governor would find his own fucking tank. Everyone had thought Shane was crazy when he'd brought back Mitch and Pete Dolgen along with some girl named Alisha. Carl hadn't gotten to know any of them, but the only important fact was that they'd brought a tank with them.

Apparently though, they'd needed the tank. However it was kind of completely destroying the prison along with the one The Governor had brought.

"I thought you were dead!" Carl yelled as he got closer to Michonne. He had seen her down where Hershel had been killed, but didn't see her get away.

"We gotta get out of here!" She called back and put her gun down, pulling Carl by the forearm to a spot where they were at least a little protected from the storm of bullets.

"We should get on the bus!" He responded, basically having to yell to be heard. Judith was awake but for once wasn't crying, he figured that she could sense the tense atmosphere though.

"The bus is gone, I watched it go. I didn't know anyone that was on it. Let's just make a run for it and we'll find everyone eventually." She countered and Carl gave one last fleeting glance towards the prison and everything that he'd known for the past few months before nodding at Michonne.

"Yeah, let's go."

They took off across the prison grounds and towards where part of the fence was down.

Right when they got to the edge, right by the forest Carl thought that he saw Maggie and a couple others, but they were moving too fast and soon the three of them were deep into the forest, jogging and holding Judith as tight as was safe.

When they finally stopped Carl realized that he had a few tears in his eyes, but he wiped them quickly and acted like it hadn't happened.

* * *

**1 YEAR OUT**

**rick**

"Rick! Man come here, you're not gonna believe this!" Abraham called, loudly, a little drunk. He was certainly red in the face, Rick thought that his hair accentuated that.

Rick was standing on one edge of the farm, lit up rather nice with ridiculously twinkly lights and the usual floodlights. Normally they wouldn't keep lights on this late but they were kind of celebrating the end of a great summer and their last harvest of crops. Rick had given the go ahead for a few people to throw a party together and they were roasting an older pig that they didn't need anymore.

It was kind of nice, a little weird honestly. Everyone was dressed up kind of nice and acting like things were normal.

Rick had to draw himself from these thoughts though to focus his attention on Abraham who was walking towards him and stumbling slightly.

"What's up Abraham?" Rick asked, setting his long flat beer down for a moment and letting Abraham clap him on the back, which almost knocked the wind out of him.

"Rosita and I did it! I poured the batter and man are we gonna make some fine pancakes." He announced, loud enough for the entire room to hear probably.

"For real? Man that's amazing!" Rick said excitedly and pulled Abraham into a tight hug. "How long now?"

"Should be having a little one within six months. Now that we've got Hilltop we can even go and get an ultrasound." Rosita sidled up alongside him as he spoke, slipping under his arm and flashing Rick a beaming smile. Rick pulled her into a hug as well.

Negan was by his side in a second, slipping an arm low around Rick's waist. "Come with me for a moment, I gotta talk to you." He whispered into Rick's ear, his breath hot and calming on his skin.

"Hmm, okay." Rick agreed with a smile. Andy followed along behind the two of them closely and Negan drew them around to the other side of the building, away from all the lights and humbug.

Negan pushed Rick down to sit in one of the metal benches that they'd stolen from a nearby park and Andy crawled up onto the other side, resting his head in Rick's lap.

"What's up?" Rick asked, looking up at Negan expectantly. Negan suddenly looked a little flustered and he reached deep into the pocket of his jeans, pulling something out and holding it tight in his hand.

Rick raised an eyebrow at his expectantly. Andy lifted his head a little in curiosity. "Give me your hand." Negan instructed and Rick held it up. Negan pushed something into his palm and then held Rick's fist closed around it. "I know it's kind of soon, but I fucking like you and I figure we're gonna be together for a long time anyway."

Rick pulled his hand away and opened it up, staring down at the small metal ring in his hand. He looked up at Negan both of his eyebrows raised. "You're asking me to marry you?" He asked.

Negan nodded. "I made it out of your sheriff's badge. One for me too." Negan pulled it out of his pocket and showed Rick.

Rick nodded slowly and then a little faster. "Yes, yeah. Absolutely I'll marry you." Rick slid the ring on and then stood up suddenly, chest to chest with Negan. "Absolutely." He repeated and pulled Negan in for a gentle kiss. When he pulled away Negan had also slipped his own on.

* * *

**carl**

They hadn't really been sure that they would all find each other again, and when they did they didn't even really know  _why_ they were still with each other. Shane, Andrea, Mitch, Pete, Alisha, they were like their own separate group. It wasn't like they were hostile, they just seemed to have different interests in mind.

Carl walked next to Maggie on the train tracks. Away from Terminus and away from where they'd almost died.

They were all hungry, very hungry, but they didn't know what they could do about it.

It was getting close to dark as they saw another one of the signs for Terminus. "Let's stay here for the night." Shane suggested and no one put up an argument, dropping their packs on the ground, obviously exhausted. Carl switched Judith to the other hip and then dropped a blanket on the ground, setting Judith on it, though she immediately started fussing and reaching for him.

Shane didn't give a shit about Judith. He'd pretended to for a while when Lori was pregnant, but when she'd died Shane just stopped caring. Rick was glad that Judith wasn't Shane's, that she was actually Rick's.

"I'll take first watch." Tyreese offered and Sasha immediately joined him.

Michonne took a seat on the ground next to Carl with a long and exasperated sigh. Maggie and Glenn walked off a little further away from the rest of them and Carol sat on the other side of Carl.

"How's Judith doing?" Carol asked, reaching forward to pull the little girl into her arms.

"She's fine. Just hungry." Carl responded, digging through his backpack for something to give her. He came up with one single can of green beans, and even Carl had to make a face at the thought of eating those.

"I think I have some apple sauce in my pack." Carol offered and dug with one arm through hers, sure enough, pulling out a small 'motts' carton of it.

"You don't have to give us your food Carol, what are you going to eat?" Carl asked, sure they shared in the group, but he didn't like feeling like he was indebted to anyone else.

"I think I'll just have to share that can of green beans with you and Michonne." She suggested with a smile, opening the apple sauce and taking great joy in feeding Judith. Carl was glad that Judith had so many people that cared about her, and would sacrifice to provide for her.

In the morning when they woke up, Carol was gone.

* * *

**8 MONTHS OUT**

**rick**

"So, what do you think?" Laura asked, guiding Rick by the hand into the Barrington House that had been effectively cleared of people for a few hours. It had taken some string pulling to get Gregory to leave his office for a while, but a determined Laura and Arat had gotten it done.

"I think it's wonderful." Rick said, walking up the steps to the front door of the house. "I really can't believe you guys got Gregory to leave for a while. This is perfect."

Rick was wearing his Sheriff's uniform which had been meticulously washed and ironed by Sherry. Andy was standing at his side as Laura pushed the door open for him to walk in, and immediately fell in line behind him.

Inside, Sherry, Arat, Rosita, Duane, Noah, Eugene, and Simon were standing on either side of an aisle that they had created and looked back at Rick expectantly. Abraham and Dwight stood up at the front with Negan in the middle, and Morgan behind them.

Rick walked, maybe a little too quickly, through the people, not really liking all eyes being on him, even if they were his closest friends. Abraham smiled at him warmly and Rosita had her hand resting on her barely showing bump.

Negan was wearing a suit, something that they'd had to go out and find in an old shop. It fit him well and Rick grinned up at him. When he got up to the front Negan took both of his hands tightly.

This is exactly where Rick wanted to be right now, he couldn't think of anywhere else. They'd made this world so perfect for each other. Not just him and Negan, all of them. They'd all worked so hard to turn this world into a good place.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, to get through this thing called life." Negan let out a small chuckle at Morgan's words and Morgan winked at the both of them.

The rest of the words Rick felt like he could barely hear, he was too lost in looking at Negan and then stumbling through his own vows, and almost crying at Negan's short and perfect vows. It was all too soon when everything was over and Negan was pulling him in for a kiss. He squeezed Rick's ass one time to hoots and cheers from everyone in attendance. When Rick turned to face the crowd he felt like he was twenty years old again. Love drunk and red lipped.

Rosita was the first to give him a hug and Rick hugged her back tightly, feeling her firm baby bump pressing against his stomach. It made Rick swell with happiness. They'd gotten the ultrasound picture yesterday and Rick couldn't imagine a better two days.

Negan slung an arm low around Rick's waist after getting all of their well wishes from friends. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to the top of Rick's head. Rick sunk into Negan's side and couldn't wait for their future.

* * *

**carl**

"I think we should head North tomorrow." Michonne stated, standing at the front of the church next to Shane. They were both apparently leaders of the group, but they never worked together, and usually one would just cave and go with the other. Shane nodded with what she had said but everyone knew that it was Michonne's plan, not one that they had made together.

Their group had never been more split than it was now at St. Sarah's church. It felt like they were two completely separate groups who just happened to be heading in the same direction and cohabiting the same space.

"Why North?" Glenn asked, sitting next to Maggie in one of the pews. They had Judith with them, Carl was sitting off to the side by himself for now. Gabriel was sitting the closest to him. Carl was slowly eating a can of cold corn.

"I figure that major metropolitan areas have the highest chance for survival. Think about D.C, there's got to be places there that were set up for huge disasters like this." Michonne rationalized.

Things had been sad, somber, ever since Carol had taken off. No one knew where she went. She didn't say anything to anybody. She's simply left all of her food and taken off in the middle of the night. Tyreese said that she's told him she was going to pee and then had never come back. They'd looked for about a day, but it obvious that she'd taken off of her own accord and hadn't been captured or killed or anything like that. She was just done with this group. It made Carl's heart hurt that she would leave them like this, and Judith could definitely tell that there was something wrong. But they would have to move on past this, just like they had to move on past everyone that they lose.

"What if D.C is gone? Just like Atlanta?" Maggie asked, thinking back to that destroyed city that they'd driven through on their way to get to Beth. Thankfully they'd gotten her out of Grady Memorial, but the city was falling apart. No of them thought that the hospital would last much longer.

Daryl stood up suddenly and took Judith from Maggie and Glenn, resting her on his hip and pacing back and forth inbetween the pews.

"Then we find somewhere else." Michonne said with a small shrug. "Then we move on, just like we always do."

That didn't sound very promising, didn't sound like they were going to find anything. But they had no other options. They would go North.

* * *

**6 MONTHS OUT**

**rick**

"Hey Rick! Get down here, there's someone at the gate!" Abraham called to Rick who was standing up on the steps to the door into the Sanctuary. It was starting to get warm again and Rick was looking around at all of their budding crops.

Rick jumped up from where he was sitting, Andy following him in interest. He jogged down the steps and to Abraham who was standing watch and looking down at someone standing at the gate. "Open the gate then." Rick told him and Abraham pulled on the rope system that drug the gate open. It could open manually and with the rope, but Rick didn't have the strength in one arm to get it open himself.

A woman stood at the gate. She looked dirty and hungry and tough. Rick faced her for a moment, sizing her up.

"I'm Rick." He said, letting her make the next move. She didn't have a gun on her, just a knife on her hip and an empty looking backpack hanging from her small frame.

"Carol." She said and sounded thirsty.

"Where are you from?" He asked. They took in new people often. Sometimes they were sent off to other communities where they could do more good, but for the most part they stayed at the Sanctuary.

"Atlanta."

"I'm from King County." He said with a small smile and moved aside to let her enter. She waited for a moment, not sure if she was going to walk inside or not. When she finally decided to Andy licked at her dry and cracking fingers.

"I'm from Macon." She responded, pithy and dry. It sounded like she hadn't talked to anyone in a long time.

"You got a group?" Rick walked further into the Sanctuary, expecting her to follow. They'd dealt with a few people coming in with the intent to do harm, like the Wolves. But Rick didn't see any malice in Carol, just a hungry woman.

"No. I left them a few months back." She answered, walking slowly and marveling at the sights around her.

"Why'd you leave them? They close by?"

"Their leader was as asshole. The people weren't... But I couldn't take it anymore. I left them back in Georgia." She explained and Rick nodded.

"You seem hungry. Follow me. Tell me more about your group. Did you have a place that you stayed in?" He inquired, leading her up into the cafeteria. There were so many people in the Sanctuary that none of them even turned to look at Carol. None of them could really tell if she was new or if they just hadn't seen her in a while.

Negan was sitting at one of the tables, eating a quick lunch with Rosita who was now noticeably pregnant. "Hey, this is Carol!" Rick greeted both of them and took a seat next to Negan, motioning for Carol to sit on the other side next to Rosita.

She looked really uncomfortably suddenly being thrown into this situation but Rosita smiled at her. "Let me go fix you a plate."

"So, tell me." Rick urged her on.

"Uh, no we were in a prison for a while but some people took it from us. Then we were on the road and I saw no reason to stay." She explained quickly. "Why are you guys so accepting? You didn't even frisk me when I walked in."

Rick shrugged. "We haven't had much bad happen. We don't really have a reason to be cautious. Plus it's not like you could cause any damage. And I was a sheriff's deputy, could tell as soon as I saw you that you weren't carrying."

Carol stared at Rick for a moment cocking his head and raising an eyebrow. "Well then sheriff, how do I join?"

* * *

**carl**

Something had happened and Carl couldn't quite explain it. They were still moving North, they were still one group, but everyone was suddenly listening to Shane like he was preaching the gospel. Even Michonne had seemed to give up trying to co lead with Shane and had let him run his course.

The man was actually making better decisions now, he hadn't tried to do anything reckless in quite a while, and they weren't starved for food or anything. But as they moved further and further North, Carl felt like things were going well, but there was something odd about relinquishing power to Shane that Carl just didn't like.

"Where do you think Carol is?" Carl asked one day to no one in particular as they walked along down a highway. Shane was at the front. Carl carried Judith and Michonne walked next to him. Glenn, Maggie, and Beth were nearby.

"Somewhere better." Michonne said, her voice loud and unafraid, it wasn't like Shane would be able to hear them.

"Better than this? She's probably dead. What else even is there?" He said, Judith was loosely on his hip and had her head rested against his shoulder, but he didn't think she was actually asleep.

"There's something out there." Michonne said astutely, nodding her head.

"Hey can I take Judith?" Daryl asked, reappearing out of the forest with nothing to show for his hunt. Carl handed her over gently and she stirred a little, settling herself into Daryl's arms.

"What do you think is out there?" Carl jumped back into his conversation with Michonne.

"Someone who made it work, communities who word together and don't fight. Walls, crops, holliday's, school, toys." Michonne looked over to Judith as she spoke and Carl quirked his lips to the side.

He wasn't sure what was waiting out there for them, whether or not it would be good. "I hope you're right Michonne, I really do."

* * *

**NOW**

**rick**

"Rick, Simon's up to something." Jesus said one day as they sat in a car together, driving back to the Sanctuary from a trade at Oceanside.

"So's Gregory." Rick responded with a sigh, his one hand gripping tightly at the wheel of the car.

"I think  _they're_ up to something." Jesus reiterated and Rick sped the car up a little, yearning to get back to the Sanctuary and see if something was going to go wrong. Now that Paul had brought it up, Rick had a sinking feeling in his gut that something was definitely going to happen.

"Gregory has decreased his trade with Oceanside. Which is fine, we can always negotiate new terms, but I don't think you guys are that low on crops, I mean how could you be?" Rick asked, it was kind of rhetorical but Rick also felt like every community had a good handle on things. Oceanside and Hilltop were the closest to each other, Hilltop had by far the most crops, and Ocean side had the fewest, so it only made sense that Hilltop would trade with them.

"We're not." Jesus agreed, pulling his beanie off of his head and noticing that they were fairly close to the sanctuary now, could see the top of the building in the distance. "I don't know what Gregory and Simon have been talking about, they won't tell me anything. But they've been having long meetings recently. And now that I think about it, it started a few months back, right around your and Negan's wedding."

Rick just shook his head, annoyed. Of course it would be Simon that would start dissent. Things have been going so well recently, Rick figured that something  _had_ to go wrong. Law of averages and everything.

Dwight pulled the gate open when they rolled up and Rick pulled the jeep in, driving it to the side where the rest of them were parked. "Let me talk to everyone else about this first. Don't mention Hilltop and Ocean side until we talk about it some more." Rick said and Jesus nodded in agreement.

He slid out of the cab of the truck, pocketing the keys and heading towards the cafeteria. He was pretty sure it was noon, and Negan liked to eat lunch on a schedule, so Rick was sure he would find him in there.

"Rick!" Rosita yelled, jogging over to him with a barely three month old baby strapped on her back. Rosita almost always had him with her, unless Abraham was holding him.

"What's up?" Rick asked, stopping in his tracks. She looked slightly panicked.

"It's Simon, he disappeared." She explained quickly and Rick put his hands on her shoulder.

"Rosita, slow down. So Simon's gone? Could he be on a run?" Rick asked.

"He took off over night, didn't even take one of the cars. And Rick, he took Andy." She finished, a little out of breath from talking so fast.

"He took my fucking dog? Jesus christ. Alright stay here I'm going to find Negan." Rick instructed and she nodded as he took off to the cafeteria, entering a little too loudly and saw Negan talking in hushed tones with Carol across the room. "Negan!" He said as he caught up to them.

"Rick, have you heard what happened?" Negan asked immediately, reaching out to rest a hand on Rick's shoulder.

"Yeah Simon took off. I think he went to Hilltop." Rick explained and leaned slightly into Negan's embrace.

"Hilltop? Has Ezekiel told you guys about Alexandria yet?" Carol asked, raising an eyebrow at the two of them. Carol spent a lot of time in the Kingdom, she was basically a go between for them.

" _Alexandria?_ " Rick repeated, desperately not wanting there to be even more confusing information to add to this.

"It's another group, we haven't actually made contact yet, but they're almost as big as us. Not as self-sustaining though. Diane the other day, she thought that she saw Simon going in, but we weren't entirely sure." Carol quickly summed up and Rick desperately ran his hand through his hair.

"Alright, okay, okay. Uh Carol, Dwight, Arat, Morgan, and Negan you guys go to this Alexandria place. I'll take everyone else and head to Hilltop."

"What do we do if we find him Rick?" Negan asked, already looking ready to go with Carol.

"Bring him to me. I'll deal with him."

* * *

**1 MONTH OUT**

**carl**

"So this place, it's  _really_ safe?" Carl asked again, holding Judith tight on his lap and looking out the windows of the car, maybe a little paranoid as he did so.

"It's safe Carl. I don't know how many times I'm going to have to tell you." Aaron joked. They soon turned onto a long road, and at the end of it Carl could see a huge metal gate. "That's it." Aaron pointed ahead and Carl leaned back in his seat, simply staring ahead.

The gate opened for them as they grew nearer and Carl marveled at it. It was similar to the prison, but yet so much more advanced, it was leagues ahead of what they'd had. Judith babbled happily in her seat and pointed out the window.

Aaron rolled to a stop inside the gate, letting the other car pull in behind them.

Aaron got out first and Carl tentatively followed after, holding Judith on his hip. Michonne and Glenn had been in the back of the car and followed after him. Michonne stuck close by Carl's side.

"Who are these people, Aaron?" A man asked, probably early twenties, but looked like he had a lot of bravado and not actually a lot of talent.

"Relax Spencer, go get Deanna." Aaron explained and Carl raised an eyebrow.

"Deanna?" Michonne questioned.

"She's kind of like the leader around here. She'll probably want to talk to each of you." Aaron explained quickly and Carl quirked his lips to the side. Shane looked on alert and Carl wondered how he was going to adapt to everything, he was the one who was probably most comfortable with being on the road.

This was going to be new for everyone, but Judith was smiling as she looked around, and Carl was, at least a little, hopeful.


	6. And I Said to Myself: Shed No Tears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah i kno i haven't posted in a long time bc this chapter was hard to write!!! Very sorry xoxo  
> NOTES  
> \- :'(  
> -big yikes  
> -if you're squeamish, the end is kinda violent/a little gory   
> -I actually cried a lil while writing this :/

**NOW**

**negan**

Arat and Morgan were in the backseat, Dwight was sitting next to him in the jeep. Carol had given them very detailed directions on how to get to 'Alexandria' and explained to them that the people didn't seem incredibly hostile and most of them never left the walls. That gave Negan a little bit of hope that maybe they weren't violent, or maybe had just been holed up there since the beginning.

Negan desperately hoped that this wasn't going to end in bloodshed. They hadn't lost very many people since the beginning, and no one that he'd been overly close with. Now that Rosita and Abraham had little baby Michael, it felt like there was so much at stake, even with just the addition of one more person A baby made things seem more real, like they were actually building something. It showed that at least Abe and Rosita were comfortable enough with bringing a child into the world.

He idled the car outside of the gates and then turned the car off, they all piled out and stood by it. On half of the fence opened and Negan could see a dark haired girl still separated from them by a chain link fence.

"Who are you guys?" She asked, rather bluntly.

"We're from another community. We come in, uh, well we come in peace." Negan stumbled over his words a bit.

The girl laughed slightly at the sentiment. "Alright, you have weapons on you?"

Negan motioned towards the car, "couple guns in there, knives on us. Just for the dead." He explained quickly.

"We're looking for someone, we think he may have some here." Morgan interjected, trying to get closer to the point.

"Oh, uh, would we know him?" She questioned and suddenly another person showed up behind her. He was Asian with slightly unruly and short black hair.

"Tara what's going on?" The new person asked. Tara seemed to ignore him in favor of listening to what Morgan said next.

"His name's Simon. We heard he may have made contact with you people. He stole something from us." Morgan summed up quickly.

"They said they're from a community and looking for Simon." Tara told Glenn.

"Simon, guy with a mustache? Real cocky?" Glenn questioned.

"That's him." Negan responded.

"He's not here." It seemed like Glenn was about to close the gate, but then yet  _another_ person showed up, this one a much smaller and older woman who put her hand on the gate, keeping it open.

"I heard the commotion. You're not going to let them in?" She asked rhetorically, looking up at Glenn with a raised brow, he seemed to back off immediately and then the woman opened the gate for them. "Come in, come in and explain everything to us. I hate to admit, but Simon isn't here right now. He told us he was with a community called Hilltop, is that where you come from?"

Negan walked in first, everyone else falling into a group behind him. Negan walked next to the woman as she led them somewhere, no one seemed hostile and no one inside the walls was armed.

"No, and it's not where Simon comes from. We're from the Sanctuary and so is Simon. Have you met anyone else from Hilltop?"

"You know, before we get into it, I'd like to get into my house. I like to record everything that's said, for transparencies sake if you can understand."

Negan didn't really understand and he desperately wanted to get back to Rick because if Simon wasn't here it meant he was probably at Hilltop. Negan stopped in his tracks when he caught sight of someone, a kid, maybe 14 or 15, who bore a striking resemblance to Rick. Negan had to compose himself quickly though and fall back into step with the woman.

The four of them piled onto a couch with Arat more leaning against the end cap while the woman set up a video camera.

"So, I'm Deanna Monroe." She introduced herself.

"I'm Negan. This is Morgan, Arat, and Dwight. We're from the Sanctuary, it's North of here, closer to D.C." Negan delegated himself to be the spokesperson, he was basically in charge whenever Rick wasn't around.

"And you say that Simon has double crossed you?"

"It appears that way. There's a trade deal between Sanctuary, Hilltop, Oceanside, and Kingdom, and Simon's been violating all of those deals."

"By trying to cut us in?" Deanna clarified.

"That's not the issue, if we'd known about your community you would have been eagerly added to the deal, but Simon doesn't have the clearance to do something like that, especially without telling anyone other than probably just the leader of Hilltop."

"And how did you find us?"

"The Kingdom knew about you apparently, has been watching the place for a while to see if you're violent or not."

Deanna was silent for a slightly uncomfortable amount of time. "Simon rubs me the wrong way, but you have to understand, he made due on everything he promised us. All the crops and supplies that we traded for."

"That wasn't his to give. Those crops were supposed to go to Oceanside and now they're doing badly because they haven't gotten anything they've been promised."

"If I may," Dwight interrupted momentarily and both Negan and Deanna nodded at him. "It isn't that we don't have enough food and such to go around, it's just that we try and make sure that every community is also self sufficient. We've put in solar panels at all of them, helped cultivate fields, evenly spread doctors, everything. So if Alexandria was part of the trade deal you would actually be growing most of your own foods and the only supplies you would be receiving would be things you couldn't grow or get here. Oceanside has fish, Sanctuary has a green house and exotic fruits, Hilltop has the best doctor of all of us. So what Simon was doing just took from our deal and didn't really add anything to it."

"That makes sense Dwight, thank you. I'd like to say that I believe you four immediately, but I can't blindly put my faith somewhere again if I obviously went so wrong with Simon. I'd like to see this Sanctuary for myself, and maybe talk to the real leader of Hilltop." Deanna finally said after stewing on it for a moment.

* * *

**SEVERAL HOURS IN THE** **FUTURE**

**rick**

Rick was on a motorcycle with Carol while Rosita, Noah, and Laura rode in the car behind him up to the gates of Hilltop.

They immediately opened inward when the residents saw Rick approaching. He was a familiar face, most people trusted Rick. Just like most people trusted Ezekiel and Natania. Not Gregory though, Rick wasn't really sure if he'd ever trusted Gregory in the first place. He'd always just thought of Jesus as the leader of the Hilltop. Gregory very rarely even visited other communities.

Rick rode into the Hilltop and brought his motorcycle to a stop basically just in the middle of the central area.

A lot of people congregated quickly around the area as the convoy of vehicles created such a noise.

Rick dismounted from the bike and kicked out the stand. "Is Simon here?" He called, addressing the entire crowd. Jesus was right behind him in a second, having come up in the car as well.

Kal responded first: "he should be in the house with Gregory." Kal pointed towards the doors and Rick stalked up to them. As he walked up he heard a noise of scuffling and a short dog bark coming from around the back of the comlpex.

He took off running in that direction, around Barrington house, just in time to see Simon dipping out the back and Andy pulling out of the mans grip as the back gate closed behind him.

"Shit!" Rick yelled and took off towards Simon, but he'd somehow barred the door from the other side and Rick was only able to ram against it to no avail.

Andy scratched at the gate, wanting to go after Simon as well, but Rick called him to heel and made his way back around to the front where everyone still was. "Simon slipped out the back." Rick admitted.

"I'll go after him." Carol immediately offered.

"No, he's definitely armed and on alert, let's just let him go for now."

Rick leaned down to ruffle Andy's ears and let out a small sigh, at least he'd gotten his dog back.

Gregory came out after hearing all the commotion and had two women that Rick didn't recognize in tow.

"Now, what's all this commotion about?" Gregory asked and without any prompting Rick surged forward and clocked Gregory across the cheek.

One of the women went on the offensive immediately and tackled Rick to the ground, catching him off guard.

"Michonne!" Rick thought that the other woman yelled, but it was actually Carol. The woman on top of Rick faltered a moment after Carol had called her name and then she slightly eased up on the pressure.

"Carol?" She asked in a voice of disbelief.

Michonne made a move to get off of Rick but Gregory quickly interjected: "what you're just going to let him go? He should be thrown in the cellar for his actions."

"Let him go Michonne, Gregory deserved it." Carol added and then after a few more moments of hesitation, Michonne stood up off of him.

"You two know each other?" Rick questioned, rolling his shoulder from where Michonne had her knee shoved into his back.

"We were from the same group in the beginning, the one that I left." Carol explained quickly and then without further ado the other woman pulled Carol into a tight hug.

"The one with the bad leader?" Rick raised and eyebrow and Carol pulled away from the woman.

"Is Shane still in charge?" Carol asked the two women.

Michonne spoke up: "he wasn't really for a while, especially after you left, but something happened along the way and he just kind of became in charge.

"And how's Judy?"

"She's good, she's real good. We haven't lost anyone."

"Well where is everyone?"

Rick noticed that a lot of people were looking at them and listening into the conversation so Rick motioned them into Barrington house. "Let's talk in here." Rick motioned. The envoy from Sanctuary, Gregory, Jesus, and the two women entered the house. The situated themselves onto the many couches and chairs in Gregory's office. Gregory sat at his usual desk and held his cheek in one hand, and looked generally dour about everything that was going on around him, but he didn't say anything or try and steer the conversation.

"Why don't you two just quickly fill us in on how you got to D.C, and what you've encountered since." Rick began and Michonne looked to the other woman, seeming to be able to speak silently with each other.

"With all due respect, we don't know who you are." The other woman finally spoke for the two of them.

"Maggie this is Rick Grimes, he's the leader of the Sanctuary. And then there's Laura, Noah, and Rosita. All people with key roles in keeping everything running around here." Carol interjected and they seemed to trust her more.

"It's nice to meet you Rick. I'm Maggie Greene and this is Michonne. We arrived in the community of Alexandria about a month ago." Maggie explained, Rick liked her so far, she seemed honest and polite. Michonne seemed just as honest but a little more hostile.

"And you've been trading with the Hilltop?" Rick questioned leaning forward a little in his seat and putting his elbows on his thighs.

"A man named Simon came and told us about the Hilltop, said they wanted to trade with us. This is the first time anyone from Alexandria has ever been. The woman in charge there, Deanna sent us. I guess Alexandria didn't know that there were any other communities in the area."

"See that's what the problem is. Simon isn't from Hilltop, he's from Sanctuary. And those weren't his supplies to trade." Rick explained.

"No, but they were  _mine_ to trade." Gregory interjected, suddenly standing and coming to lean against the front of his desk, crossing his arms over his chest in a weak attempt at looking tough.

"No, they  _weren't._ If I remember correctly Gregory, you signed the trade deal for Hilltop. And then Hilltop elected Bertie to be in charge of all trade." Jesus raised an eyebrow at Gregory. "And if I remember correctly she told me that you'd been telling her to do some  _weird_ things with the supplies but to not tell anyone about it."

"Well it's not my fault she listened to me." Gregory tried to defend himself.

"You're in charge Gregory, you can't expect your people to defy a direct order." Jesus countered and Gregory made an annoyed humming noise.

"Why did you give the supplies to Alexandria? Oceanside has been really struggling." Carol asked of him and Rick could tell that Gregory didn't appreciate all eyes being on him and suddenly interrogating him.

"Simon told me that it was in our best interests to do so. Said that there were people at Alexandria that we wanted to be friends with." Gregory argued.

Michonne spoke up suddenly, "Simon started coming around when our group reached Alexandria. He's been talking a lot with the leader of  _our_ group, not Alexandria a lot."

"And who's the leader of your group?" Rick was trying to get all the names straight in his head. Deanna ran Alexandria, but whoever this person was ran another faction that was inside of Alexandria, it was all rather convoluted.

"A man named Shane, Shane Walsh." Michonne supplied.

Rick furrowed his brow and didn't speak for a moment, then stood up suddenly and walked around behind the couch, bracing his one hand on the back of it and looking intently at Michonne.  _It couldn't be..._ "You guys are from Georgia? Any idea what part Shane was from?"

"I don't know, sorry." Michonne said.

Maggie looked like she was deep in thought for a moment. "I don't quite remember the exact county. Maybe Macon? Somewhere nearby. He was a sheriff's deputy though."

Rick straightened his back a bit and turned away from everyone, taking a brief moment to breath.

"Rick, you okay?" Rosita asked, reaching out to rest a hand on his forearm.

After a long minute Rick turned back around to face everyone. "Shane Walsh is my old partner." He finally said. If Simon and Shane were talking then it only meant one thing... Shane had let himself be consumed by power. The man had always been a bit of an ass, and being a police officer certainly let him be in a position of power over people. Rick had always thought there was a chance that Shane could let it all go to his head.

"Wait so you're Shane's partner, from the same county as him, and you're name is Rick  _Grimes?_ " Maggie double checked, looking searchingly at Michonne for a moment.

"That's me." Rick responded.

Michonne shook her head slightly at Maggie as Maggie nodded. "It has to be." Maggie whispered to her and Michonne wiped her forehead with her hand, nodding finally at Maggie. "Rick... Do you, I don't really know how to ask this, Carl-"

Rick cut her off immediately. " _Carl?_ My  _son?_ " He parroted, his voice slightly frantic as he felt every muscle in his body tense.

"Yes, thank God, your son. He's in Alexandria!" Maggie said, a wide and brilliantly white smile over taking her features.

"What about my wife? What about Lori?" He questioned, leaning against the back of the couch with the full extent of his weight.

Maggie looked down at her lap for a moment. "I'm so sorry Rick she died giving birth."

"She... She was pregnant before all this, was it, could it be, my baby?" Rick asked, his head tingling with nervous excitement. He'd already grieved for Lori's death and moved on, already had accepted that it had probably happened, there was no reason to be sad about it when it was confirmed.

"Judith..." Carol whispered under her breath in what sounded like astonishment.

Rick thought that he could see tears misting in the corners of Maggie's eyes. "Rick, I delivered your daughter." She said, very quiet and soft, almost like she couldn't believe what she was saying.

"We have to go to Alexandria, right now." Rick said suddenly.

Noah stood up, it took him a moment with his leg. "Not all of us Rick.  _You_ definitely need to go. Rosita you should go too. I'll take Laura back with me. Jesus, you mind going to Kingdom to let them know what's going on? Think someone from Hilltop could ride to Oceanside and fill them in?" He asked, looking around the room at everyone.

"I don't want to leave no one here in charge of Hilltop." Rick said, especially now that there might be a threat afoot.

"I'll be here." Gregory tried to say but Rick gave him a tight look.

"I can stay behind. I know you don't really know me but I could try and get to know everyone around here. And I know Shane well enough if he truly is up to something with Simon." Maggie offered, joining the three other standing people.

"I can vouch for Maggie." Carol looked up at Rick and he nodded down to her.

"Alright, let's get moving."

* * *

**SLIGHTLY AFTER RICK**

**negan**

Deanna was in the back seat with her son Spencer and the kid that Negan had seen earlier was in the seat next to him.

"So you're saying that this Shane guy took off a few hours ago with three other members of your group?" Negan asked, trying to run through the story one more time. They were on their way to Sanctuary. Deanna wanted to meet Rick and Negan was sure that the man would probably, hopefully, be headed back there sometime soon.

They'd also felt a slight bit of urgency when Carl had told them what happened the first time around, and now Negan was asking for the story again. "He told me around noon that he was meeting Simon for a pick up. Then he took Pete, Mitch, and Alisha and didn't tell us where they were meeting." Carl ran through and Negan tightened his grip on the steering wheel.

Everyone else from the Sanctuary plus the girl Tara that had met them at the gate was in the car behind them. Neither Negan nor Deanna had wanted a car that only had members from one community in it, in case either of them were planning on tricking them.

"Simon's a god damn fucking prick." Negan muttered and Deanna laughed at his phrasing, Spencer looked ticked off.

"Yeah he is." Carl said, nodding his head.

"He stole my husbands dog and took off. That's why we spread out to all the communities." Negan said, adding a detail to the story that he hadn't mentioned yet.

"You guys drove all the way out here for a  _dog?_ " Carl asked, furrowing his brows and cracking a bit of a smile.

"Alright smart ass, this wasn't just any dog and my husband ain't just any guy. He's the leader of the Sanctuary and he met that dog like three days into the apocalypse, fucking loves that thing. I've seen him let Andy lick his face even when he was all covered in mud-" Negan was cut off by Car laughing.

"Sorry that just sounds like my dad. My mom would  _never_ let us get a dog but my dad really loved them. He'd take me to the humane society some weekends so we could walk them." Carl explained and the shimmering glimmer of happiness in his eyes made Negan crack a smile as well.

"You like dogs kid?" Negan questioned.

"I used to really like them. Haven't really seen one that wasn't feral for a while though." He said and propped up one of his ankles on his knee.

"You'll like Andy, Andy likes anyone who isn't a prick. That's why we knew Simon must have stolen him, dog fucking hates Simon."

They were getting closer to the Sanctuary, all one had to do was follow the biblical symbolism until they hit the complex.

There wasn't much more talking until they got closer and Negan felt like he heard something odd in the distance, a noise that he wasn't used to.

"Roll down your windows." Carl said suddenly, clicking his and rolling it all the way down. Negan rolled the car to a stop and then they all listened very intently until they heard it,  _gun fire._

"Fuck! Hold on I'm gonna step on it." Negan said and then suddenly they were accelerating way past whatever the speed limit must have been.

"We're going  _towards_ the danger?" Spencer questioned from the back.

"My family's there. I can let you guys out here if you want." Negan offered and Deanna shook her head.

"No, let us help you."

Negan was surprised that they didn't get into a wreck with how obnoxiously fast he was driving. When they pulled up to the front gate of the Sanctuary he had to slam on the breaks. The gate was ajar, slightly open, but not enough for the car to get in. There were panicked noises, gun shots, and screams coming from inside.

Everyone piled out of the car and Negan grabbed his rifle, he tossed one to Carl. "You coming in kid?" He asked.

Carl nodded and gripped the rifle tight in his hands. "I'll stick you with."

The second car was there soon too and Negan instructed everyone to keep low and make it into the building so they could have cover and find out where the shooters were. Arat and Morgan offered to get into one of the guard towers and Negan nodded.

"Stay close." Negan ordered to Carl and then told Deanna and Spencer to stay outside the gate, keeping an eye on walkers that may be coming close. Tara tagged along easily with Dwight.

They split up for the most part as soon as they entered the gates. He saw a few dead bodies on the ground but tried not to pay any attention to them. He didn't know any of them personally and for that he gave small thanks.

None of the gun men seemed to be outside anymore so they made their way around the back of the building. Negan didn't want to enter in through the cafeteria because it was such a wide open space. They headed to the largest part of the complex and entered in through a back door. The first light in the hall had been struck dead on with a bullet and was shattered all over the ground, the second one they could see was flickering.

The gun fire had died down a bit by this point. "If this is Simon then I think I know where he'll be." Negan said and motioned for Carl to stick close against the wall.

"Where's that?" Carl whispered back.

"There's a second, smaller building on the far side from the crops and there's a fence over there that several people could slip out of. If he started shooting in the field then it would make sense for him to move to that exit." Negan explained quickly.

They heard voices as they grew further down the hall and Negan held up his hand for Carl to stop.

Negan listened intently and let out a sigh when he realized who it was. Rounding a corner he came upon a door, beyond it was a very soft voice talking quietly, almost too quiet to pick up.

Negan pushed down on the door handle and when he opened it a crack he called, "it's Negan."

Sherry was standing inside with her gun up pointed at him, and baby Michael in her other arm. She dropped the gun immediately when she saw him. "Oh thank god." She was in the room with a few other women that he barely knew, one of them he thought was named Frankie. "Dwight, where's Dwight?"

"He got here with us, he's somewhere around here. Sherry who did this?"

"It was Simon and three other people that I didn't recognize. Abraham and Eugene might be the only ones still after them." She explained quickly and bounced Michael again as he began to get fussy.

"Three other people, that's gotta be Shane." Carl had wide eyes as he said that and shook his head slightly.

"Stay quiet in here Sherry, we're gonna go find Abe and Eugene."

They backed out of the room just as quietly as they had entered and Carl didn't make a peep as they wandered through the ground floor. There was another gun shot and Carl jumped but didn't make a noise.

Negan was confident that he knew the location of the gunmen after that shot. It wasn't likely that Simon would have had them split up in a place as confusing as the Sanctuary could be for new people, so he wasn't worried about being caught off guard.

They moved swiftly and at some point Tara and Dwight melded in with them and Dwight had a good idea of where they were too.

Reaching a door that Negan knew led out to the last courtyard before the fence Negan held up his hand for everyone to stop.

"Dwight, you push open the door for me and I'll go out first. Then Tara, then Carl." He ordered and the three of them nodded.

Dwight stood on the left side ready to push the door open while Negan stood to the right with everyone lined up behind him.

Before they pushed the door open they heard another gun shot and then a loud grunting shout. Dwight pushed the door open at that moment and Negan had barely any time to take in the scene in front of him.

Abraham was collapsing to the ground, four of the five gun men were running for the fence and one woman stood with her gun still up at Eugene. Negan raised his rifle and fired as many rounds as he could into her while Tara and Carl took aim at the men running towards the fence, it seemed like they slipped out of the fence before anyone could get hurt though.

Eugene dived next to Abraham and was able to stop his head from hitting the ground too hard as he fell. He had three gun shot wounds along his right shoulder and Eugene pressed a very harsh pressure again them.

"Negan!" He called and Negan came in next to Abraham as well, trying to push his own hands down on the wound.

"Oh shit, fuck." Negan mumbled. This was bad,  _one_ gunshot was bad, three was a death sentence. They both knew it.

"Let's get him inside!" Dwight shouted, coming up to them as well, eager to get Abraham up.

"We can't." Eugene said, his normal monotonal voice taken over by emotions as tears tracked down his face. "He'll lose too much blood if we move him." His voice quavered and stuttered over the words.

"We have to try. Come on, Rosita isn't even here." Dwight collapsed to his knees and then Abraham had a third hand on his chest, trying in vain to stop the bleeding. Carl and Tara looked on in petrified horror.

"Come on Abe, come on. Open your eyes man. Think of Rosita. Think of Michael." Negan spoke to him but Abraham was quickly loosing color in his face and blood was all over Negan's hands, making it almost too slick to hold pressure down.

Abraham coughed harshly, blood coming out of his mouth and tracking down his chin. His arm moved suddenly and gripped at Eugene's forearm. "... _gene..._ " he mumbled.

"Don't try to talk Abraham, you're aspirating. Blood is filling your lungs." Eugene said and sniffled harshly. Abraham's grip on Eugene's forearm was rock tight.

Dwight stripped his flannel shirt off in record time and tried to mop up some of the blood. "Come on big guy, come on. This is a fucking scratch." Dwight babbled out and pressed down on the flannel but soon it was soaked in blood as well and the three of them realized in horror that they were kneeling as well in a pile of blood.

Tears ran freely from all three of their eyes and Dwight had his mouth set in an angry line. "Abraham." Negan called his name again. "Abraham!" He shouted, trying to see if he could still get the mans attention. "Abraham..." He whispered the last one.

The grip on Eugene's arm went limp all of a sudden and Abraham's hand fell into the pool of blood. Fresh blood stopped pumping out of the wounds. And Eugene sat back on his calves and cried.


	7. Portrait of the Leader as a Man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ack I tried my hand at a rick grimes speech(TM) in this chapter and i think it went well??? I hope i captured his character! Also I'm sorry I made Simon sound too much like show Negan. Whoopsies.   
> please enjoy xoxo

**SHORTLY AFTER LAST CHAPTER**

**negan**

He has the brim of Rick's hat pulled down on his forehead, trying to keep the sun from burning his as they dug a grave in the scorching heat of the summer.

Their cemetery was small, only two other people were buried in it and Abraham was the first death that wasn't of natural causes. They were always so safe...

Negan hadn't wanted to dig the grave before Rosita got back, but Eugene insisted that they didn't know when she was going to be back and they couldn't let Abraham begin to decompose. So Eugene had gotten the shovels out and they were trying to take turns with the grueling work, but Eugene had refused to take a break so far. Carl and Tara had sat on the sidelines, jumping in to help whenever they could.

Deanna and her son where in the cafeteria talking with Sherry, Dwight, and Morgan about the vaguest ideas of a trade deal. Everything was eventually up to Rick, Ezekiel, Natania, and... Jesus? Negan couldn't be sure anymore.

"What was his name?" Carl asked from his spot sitting on the grassy ground. He had a slab of wood that he had found and a knife in his hand.

"Abraham Ford." Negan said and Carl got to work carving at the piece of wood.

"Any idea the year he was born?" Carl called again but no one knew the answer.

When the grave was finally finished they wrapped Abraham in a sheet and lowered him slowly inside. Eugene had done the final job of putting a knife in the base of his skull.

They filled the plot back in with dirt and Sherry showed up at some point with a small wildflower that she'd uprooted and put in the dirt as the filled it in. Carl cross section for the sign to stand on and Negan was impressed with how professional the  _Abraham Ford_ had been carved into it. Next to his name, instead of two dates, was simply and infinity symbol.

Eugene thanked Carl profusely for the sign and he put the last shovel full of dirt into the grave.

They took a long moment of silence around it and Dwight rested his hand on Negan's shoulder.

"Rick and 'Sita should be back soon. Let's finish digging the other graves." Dwight suggested, motioning to the four other people who had died in the gun fight, already wrapped in white cloth.

Halfway through finishing the digging there was the sound of a motorcycle idling outside the gate and Negan jogged to go find out who it was.

Noah and Laura rode in, Noah on the back and Laura parked the bike.

"Where's Rick?" He asked immediately as this was the bike that Rick had left on earlier in the day.

"He went to Alexandria with Carol and Rosita. We found Andy but fuck Negan you aren't gonna believe this. Rick's son is alive! And he has a baby daughter at Alexandria too." Noah explained quickly, dismounting from the bike.

"What?" Negan asked, a look of disbelief crossing his face. That little girl he'd seen at Alexandria.

"Yeah. Apparently they were in Carol's original group so they went there with Rosita to find them. But the lead guy, Shane, they're also trying to find him because I guess he's in cohorts with Simon? Oh  _and,_ Shane is Rick's old partner on the force." Noah tried to sum up everything that had happened while following Negan's quick pace back to the grave sights.

"We know about Shane. They were here, Shane, Simon, and three other people who were from Alexandria. They killed five people. Abraham was one of them."

When Negan finished talking they'd arrived at the grave. Noah and Laura stared on in horror at the freshly displaced dirt. "Oh God." Laura mumbled and Arat leaned against her side, the step-sisters using each other for comfort.

"Who's Rick's son? I must have seen him while I was there." Negan rationalized, speaking to Noah now.

"Shit I don't remember. Hey Laura do you remember the kids name?" Noah called to her and she nodded immediately.

"Yeah he used to talk about him on the road all the time, right at the beginning. It's Carl." She said and that piqued the attention of Carl standing on the other side of the grave by Tara.

"Someone say my name?" He asked and Negan felt his jaw, quite literally, drop.

" _No,"_ Negan mouthed, barely even making any noise.

" _That's Carl?_ " Laura exclaimed and she and Noah shared a look with each other.

"What's going on? Should I know you guys?" Carl furrowed his brows and looked up at the three of them who were basically just staring in abject shock.

"Your dad's alive." Negan said finally, regaining his ability to talk. It was Tara's turn to stare at Carl with wide eyes.

"Excuse me?" Carl asked, looking a little bit upset by the news.

"He's the leader here. Rick. The guy I told you about who lost his dog." Negan tried to explain and Carl walked around the grave to where Negan was standing.

"The one you said was your husband?"

"That's the one."

Carl didn't respond for a moment and looked concernedly down at the ground. "Shane told me my dad died in the hospital before all this shit even began."

Morgan had appeared in the group at some point and was able to fill in some of the story of Rick's early days. "Most people in the King County Hospital had died but Rick woke up from his coma and me 'n my son found him on your families front lawn. Tried to find you guys in the early days but everywhere we went ended up being a bust."

"Where is he?" Carl asked then, his eyes still looking far off, glassy, and nonbelieving.

"He's at Alexandria right now actually. Met Michonne and Maggie at Hilltop and they said that you and your little sister were there." Noah explained.

* * *

**ONE HOUR PRIOR**

**rick**

"Glenn!" Carol greeted and swung her arms around the slender Asian man, catching him off guard after he opened the gate for Rick and company.

Glenn stumbled back a few feet and then caught Carol in an equally as tight hug, a look of disbelief on his face as he did so.

"Carol." He finally stuttered out as everyone else piled into the open gate, leaving the cars parked outside.

"Is Shane here?" She asked when she finally pulled away from him and Glenn shook his head 'no'.

"Shit." Carol mumbled to herself.

"Uh, what's going on? Who are these people?"

"Long story, but they're from another community, system of communities. Simon's a bad guy, he's in league with Shane, oh and this is Carl's  _dad._ " Michonne gave the short and easy of everything that had transpired and then pointed at Rick.

"Like those guys who showed up earlier? Big tall guy in a leather jacket was their leader?" Glenn questioned and another woman appeared who gave Carol a quiet hug as well.

"Yes! Are those people still here?" Rick interjected suddenly. A few more people were gathering around the group, listening into the conversation that they were having just inside of the gate. No one seemed to pay them any mind.

"No, they left a little while ago with Deanna, Spencer, Tara, and Carl." Glenn explained. "Wait, you're Carl's  _dad?_ " It finally dawned on him what Carol had been saying earlier.

Rick nodded his head quickly. "Where did they go?"

"Uh, Deanna told me that they were going to check out this new community and see if you guys were telling the truth about Simon." Glenn explained and Rick shared a quick look with Rosita.

"Shane's not here." Rick said to her and she nodded her head.

"They could already be at Sanctuary." She agreed with what he had nonverbally said.

"Michonne, where's Maggie?" Glenn interrupted suddenly and fiddled with the gold band on his wedding finger.

"She's at Hilltop. Even longer story there really, but she's keeping watch over the place like an interim leader almost." Michonne said but that seemed to make Glenn even more confused so Michonne pulled him to the side to explain everything that had happened to him.

Rick turned to Rosita to talk quickly about what their next move was but Carol grabbed him harshly by the shoulder before they could talk much.

"Rick that's Judith." She pointed a finger towards a large man who was holding an incredibly small girl in his hands.

"Carol!" His voice boomed and he picked up the pace. Rick could only watch in awe as the baby was sandwiched inbetween the two of them in a tight hug.

"Tyreese, you need to meet Rick Grimes. He's the leader of a nearby community and he's Rick and Judith's father." Carol took the girl from Tyreese's arms that seemed to let her go limp into Carol's. Most people were staring at Rick now as he in turn stared at his daughter in Carol's arms.

"Judith?" He questioned softly, unsure of himself and her. She cooed softly. "God she looks just like Lori." He whispered and looked up at Carol for reassurance.

She simply handed the little girl to him and Rick took her very gingerly in his hands. Andy came around and pawed at his jeans, sniffing at Judith. She leaned forward out of Rick's arms to touch the dog on the head and he sat very diligently as Judith pulled at her hair.

Rosita touched his arm suddenly, gently forceful. "Rick." She muttered and he nodded at her. "I don't want to leave either."

"We really need to get to the Sanctuary." He told Carol and she tweaked her lips to the side but nodded.

"We do."

Tyreese took Judith back while the woman that Rick got introduced to, Sasha, volunteered to go with them to the Sanctuary along with Glenn and Michonne.

It was decided that Sasha would stay back just in case Shane came to Alexandria.

The rest of them piled into two cars and took off back down the road to the Sanctuary.

Rick didn't want to have to leave Judith again, but it was the necessary decision as he didn't want to put her in the line of fire by taking her to the Sanctuary at such a tumultuous time. Hopefully Shane wouldn't hurt her. Rick hoped that he still knew the man well enough to say that he wouldn't hurt a child.

It had been a long time though... Shane had always had his anger issues and of course he's always been after Lori as well. Rick could remember a lot of summers where Rick would take Carl out on long camping trips and Shane would just tag along because he "had nothing else to do". It was complete bull shit. Shane had always envied Rick's life. He got the girl that they both wanted. The house in the best neighborhood. The idyllic son. And everyone in town loved Rick Grimes. Shane had never said anything but Rick felt it bubbling under the surface. He wondered often how his life would be if none of this shit had ever happened, and in  _some_ ways it would be worse.

Rick would have never met Negan or made all these life time bonds. He never would have met Andy nor become a real leader that people looked up to. If this hadn't happened though he would still have Carl, and he could have seen Judith grow up. There was still time for all of that though... Rick hoped.

The road was fairly dead as they drove.

"Hey Rick," Rosita got his attention and turned the Merle Haggard CD down a little bit so they could talk. Carol, Glenn, and Michonne were shoved into the backseat tightly.

"What's up?" He quickly glanced away from the road and at her.

"I was thinking since Gregory's out of the picture now, and Jesus has obviously never wanted to be a leader. Maybe Abe and I could move to Hilltop.  _I_ don't want to be in charge, I like my job how it is but Abraham knows how everything works. Ezekiel and Natania like him, I just think he would be a good pick." She explained and Rick nodded in thought for a moment.

"You really gonna go back to scavenging soon?" He asked her, raising an eyebrow and avoiding the question for just a moment. Rosita had been staying in for the past almost four months to watch Michael, but he could tell that she was itching for adventure and thrill.

"I am." She stated with a nod.

"I suppose I could team you up with Jesus. I know I'm not in charge of the guy at all but I'd really rather he go out with someone on runs. Having Abe in charge of Hilltop would also give him the ability to stay there and take care of Michael. He certainly  _does_ know how everything works..." Rick trailed off a bit. "We'll talk about it but  _I_ like it. We haven't really had anything like this come up before but I'll throw Abe's name into the hat for who should take charge of Hilltop. I doubt anyone over there is going to present themselves. Just warning you though Ezekiel might suggest Noah." Rick said to her.

Rosita cracked a smile and almost snorted at the prospect. "Noah would  _hate_ that." She rolled her eyes and leaned back into the seat, feeling confidant in the fact that Abe might just be a shoe-in for the job. The Hilltop was also currently the best place to have a kid because Dr. Harlan was stationed there. The  _other_ Dr. Carson spent most of his time at Oceanside, Kingdom had their own Dr, and a few months ago Sanctuary had run into a kid named Siddiq who had medical training. So no community was without a doctor right now, Dr. Harlan just happened to be the best with children and pregnancies.

They were planning on having more kids, her and Abraham, and they would definitely get around to it once they got settled in at Hilltop.

They came to a four way intersection that had a wooden sign post up at it. One direction pointed to Hilltop and Oceanside, another to Kingdom, and the last to the Sanctuary. Something was different about the intersection though, as they'd come down it on the way to Hilltop.

There was a car parked in the center, the dead center.

Rick rolled his own car to a stop.

"Why are we stopping?" Michonne asked, her eyes were narrowed and she already looked like she was sniffing out danger.

"Car wasn't here when we came by." Rosita answered and slid out, drawing her gun and holding it down by her thigh.

The rest of them got out and approached the stopped car.

"It's a Sanctuary car." Rosita said, recognizing it as one that was usually in their lot. She opened the passenger door and rifled through the glove box. They kept a list in the cars of who had used it last. You signed and printed your name just so it was easier to keep track of who was going out the most. "Simon's name is all over this. Gotta be his." She said, throwing it on the floor of the car and standing up straight.

A bullet whizzed by Rosita's face and hit her cheek, slicing the skin open but not doing anything other than cosmetic damage. Rosita dropped to the ground immediately and scooted behind the car, opposite of where the bullet had come.

Michonne and Carol crouched behind the car they had come in, Glenn did an army roll to where Rosita was, and Rick basically jumped directly into the ditch to their side with Andy scurrying after them.

On one side of the road was a long field, only separated by the road that went to Hilltop/Oceanside. On the other side of the road was a dense forest. The road that cut between these two foliages was the Sanctuary/Alexandria road.

So whoever was in the forest had them pinned with nowhere to run but a wide open field.

"Come out! Hands up!" A voice called from the tree line and Rick recognized it as Simon's.

No one moved.

A barrage of bullets were shot at the still running car that Michonne and Carol were behind. Glenn had a strip of his shirt pressed against Rosita's cheek, trying to keep the bleeding to a minimum.

"Alright! We'll come out!" Rick called and he was the first one to climb out of the ditch, he held his gun above his head.

"Drop the gun Rick!" Simon shouted and Rick laid it on the ground. Carol and Michonne came next.

"Hey Ro-Si-Ta! Why don't you wanna come out and play?" Simon shot another bullet at the parked car and Glenn helped her stand up. She seemed kind of dazed off of the pain in her face and Glenn had to hold a tight pressure on cheek, he had one hand on either side of her head to keep it steady and forceful. "Hands  _up_ asshole's!" Simon reiterated.

"You hit her! She's got a bad cut on her cheek and she's out of it. I can't let up on the pressure." Glenn responded.

Four men advanced out of the tree line and Rick held his breath. He knew who one of them was going to be, it  _had_ to be.

Shane.

"Rick?" The man asked, pulling his hat off of his head and squinting his eyes a little. "Son of a bitch, that is you ain't it?"

"It's me Shane." He said somberly, his hands still up in the air. His posture was aloof as Shane stared at him.

"Simon, I know this guy and he's not bad. He's a good man." Shane turned to Simon to argue. Simon silenced Shane with a harsh shove.

"This is the man I told you about. Cold hearted prick." Simon drawled and Andy sat on his haunches, baring his teeth at the man. "Do me a favor Shane and kill that fucking dog." Simon pointed to the dog.

"Andy git!" Rick shouted at his dog quickly, pointed for him to run back towards the field. Andy was quicker than Shane and by the time Shane had his gun up, he had nothing to shoot at.

"Didn't I tell you to keep your  _fucking_ hands  _up!_ " Simon yelled and shot a warning shot passed Rick's head.

"Simon man, I've got to get her to a doctor. I think the fucking fat is going to pour out of her cheek if I move this." Glenn said looking pointedly at the blood soaked fabric scrap that was pressed up against Rosita's cheek. Rosita's eyes were fluttered and almost all of her weight was leaned up against Glenn.

"Not my fault she's a fucking idiot." Simon shrugged.

" _Abraham_ 's going to take over at Hilltop Simon. Gregory doesn't have power there anymore." Rick explained. "You can't pull anymore shit on these communities."

"See that's where I think you're wrong. I think I can cause a whole lot more shit. I think I can cause  _so much shit_ in fact, that I'm going to be the last one standing to lead these people. There's not a lot of leaders among your people Rick. I just have to take out the people on top and this will all be over with. No one will fight back."

" _No._ We'll always fight back. To the last damn man." Rick countered.

Simon paced a few steps to his left and then back to his right, speaking as he did so. "Oh Rick, you have too much faith in these people. Who does the Kingdom have? Ezekiel? Jerry? Maybe Richard or Dianne? That's all. Hilltop's already crippled, second in command is never  _even around._ Oceanside? Don't get me started on them, they have  _no one._ So I thought to myself," Simon tapped his forehead with his handgun. "What community would be the hardest to take over?

"That's easy Rick. It's the one I know the most about. I have to say though, you did give me  _quite_ the job. 'Oh Rick, please can I be a delegate for the communities?' 'Rick I promise I'll handle the trade agreements!'. I can't believe you fell for that SHIT! I know  _everything._ I know that without Noah, Eugene would be a spineless coward only working for his own good." Simon shot hit gun off into the air. " _BAM!_ He's gone. I know that if Morgan was gone, Laura, Arat, and Duane, would crumple right along with him.  _BAM!_ He's gone. I happen to fucking know that if you and Negan were gone? That would take a hell of a lot of players off the board.  _BAM! BAM!_ Gone. And  _poor_ Rosita! You know, I didn't mean for you to be the first in my plan to dispirit the fighters, and don't quote me on this guys because I only saw part of the gun battle but when we were over there, shooting up the Sanctuary it got down to two people left. Eugene and Abraham, and fuck, I  _think,_ if I'm not mistaken, I saw that gigantic redhead get just a little more red!"

Rosita went slack against Glenn and he was suddenly collapsing to the asphalt with her, trying to hold her head and keep it above her heart without being able to move his hands.

"You  _didn't!_ " Rick shouted at Simon, spit flying from his mouth as he did so. Carol had her hands clamped in front of her mouth. "You don't have enough people for this Simon! You killed Abraham  _for nothing!_ " Rick emphasized and felt the tendons in his neck bulging.

"Oh but we  _do._ See Shane, Mitch, and Pete here? They're only a few. While you guys were building your farms, and watching fucking movies at the Kingdom, I found another community. And that community  _wants_ what you have, and damn if they don't want to share. People Rick, lots of them. And lots of guns too." Simon explained and Rick pushed his lips together into a hard line.

"Why do you want to see everything we've created fail?"

"I don't. I think that you're already creating a failure. There's no drive to work in these communities, everyone has everything that they need. People are allowed to just sit around while other people do all the heavy lifting for them. Maybe you forgot Rick, but I was there that night you killed your first human. The night that Negan approached you and gave his spiel on morality and how he's looking for people who still have it. Well I thought that was a load of bull- _shit._ There's no morals anymore, no code of ethics. So Morgan and Eastman can read their  _stupid_ books and you can kill all the rapists you can find, but there's nothing stopping me from killing you anyway Rick. Because this is the new world and the weak die."

Rick kind of thought that Simon's speech sounded like the ramblings of a mad man on the verge of a breakdown, but he looked so resolute. So full of pride and righteousness, Rick had to believe that  _Simon_ believed every word that came out of his mouth.

"Shane." Rick got the mans attention.

" _Don't_ talk to him! This is between us Rick!" Simon interrupted.

Rick ignored him. "Carl was at The Sanctuary! When you guys were there." He interjected and Shane's face went pale.

"Do you  _want_ to lose another arm?" Simon basically screamed at him. Pete shot a walker that was wandering up the field towards them.

They heard the sound of a motorcycle rumbling along with a heavy car behind it, and then up the road from Hilltop were two vehicles with people Rick didn't recognize.

"Fuck!" Simon muttered and waved everyone back into the woods.

There were more sounds of vehicles then, coming from the direction of Sanctuary was one large jeep.

Rick stayed tensed up even as the cars approached, not sure if Simon was still planning something.

The man on the motorcycle arrived first and the car behind him stopped with him.

"Aaron! Daryl! Grab the first aid kit!" Glenn yelled at them and the first man, Aaron, grabbed a large bag from his car, picking up the pace while Daryl knelt by Rosita.

"What's goin' on here?" Daryl asked, looking up at Michonne and Carol who still kind of half had their arms up and Rick who was staring intently into the forest.

"It's Shane and Simon. They were just here. Shot her." Michonne explained as Aaron pulled a suture and some medical thread out of the bag.

"Daryl, you know how to do this right?" Aaron asked him and Daryl nodded.

"This is gonna hurt like hell." Daryl said to Rosita but she didn't stir, was still out cold.

The three men piled around and got to work on the impromptu surgery as the jeep from Sanctuary pulled up.

Andy came back up from where he'd been hiding in the ditch and jumped up on the car door as Negan got out. Rick immediately forgot about the impending threat in the forest and took Negan into his arms "Abraham?... Is he?" Rick mumbled into Negan's jacket.

Negan didn't respond verbally, just nodded against Rick's head. "Rick, I have someone with me though." He said, pulling out of Rick's embrace.

Rick barely had time to fully register who he was seeing in front of him.

Carl's face broke out into one of the widest grins Rick had ever seen. A shot rang out from beyond the tree line and Carl's eyebrows scrunched up in pain. "Dad...?"

Carl collapsed to the ground and Rick dove to Carl's side and yelled in shock. He didn't know what to do, there was so much blood coming from Carl.

"RICK! YOU'D BETTER GIVE UP SOON IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU!" Simon's voice came one last time before Rick was sure he'd be gone.

* * *

**NOW**

**rick**

In the medical room at Sanctuary, Carl and Rosita lay in beds next to each other. They were both still not reacting to anything and Siddiq explained that he was hopeful about Rosita's recovery, but he couldn't say when Carl would wake up. Rick gave blood, he gave a lot of blood, probably too much to his son and then watched in helplessness as Siddiq did all that he could.

"Rick." Morgan rested a hand on his shoulder. "This is Deanna, she's the leader of Alexandria."

The room suddenly had two more occupants in it, although it was already almost bursting. It seemed like everyone was in the small medical room. Sherry was sitting next to Rosita's bed with Michael on her lap.

"Rick, I understand that now isn't the time for out communities to talk. I'm sorry that Shane's actions had to cause a divide between us." She shook his hand but Rick barely even comprehended what was going on.

It felt like the cogs in his mind turned for a long time as he held her small hand in his, thinking things over. Negan had an arm around Rick's waist and looked at his husband with worry since Rick had been silent for co long.

"I... With all due respect Deanna I don't think it does." Most people stopped their side conversations and looks towards Rick. "Yes, Shane has committed something atrocious, but a man from my community has too. As much as I would like to say my son is from my community, he isn't, so the fact remains that these two have hurt people from both communities. However, our communities have come together like I would have never expected. Maggie has been left basically in charge of Hilltop for a short time, on the recommendation of a woman who used to be a part of Shane's group and has now become a vested member of ours. Not just a member of our community but  _family._

"In Alexandria today, I saw a man I didn't know, taking care of a baby that wasn't his like she was his own. Tyreese, I think his name was, was taking care of my daughter. I'd never asked him to, I'd never met him before. But my son put his trust in that man, and I trust my son. Sasha wanted to come with us, but when I said someone needed to remain back and protect the people of Alexandria, and  _my daughter,_ she immediately volunteered, putting her own life on the line as one of the few fighters remaining back at Alexandria.

"And finally, today on the road. I was with a group of people, two of which I knew very well, and two of which I didn't know at all. When Rosita was struck by that bullet Glenn didn't stop to think about the fact that he didn't know her, he simply dived in and kept pressure on her wound. I watched him  _argue_ with Simon about how he couldn't put his hands up because he had to stop Rosita's bleeding. I  _know_ Simon, and he could have so easily shot at Glenn for those words, I'm surprised he didn't. Glenn sacrificed his life for a woman that he had met an hour ago. And then Daryl and Aaron, without one word of question but to work stitching Rosita's cheek after they'd just seen men with guns retreating into the forest. They didn't stop to think that maybe those men would return and they should have their weapons ready, no, they just saw someone on the ground who needed help and they  _helped her._

"So I don't think that Shane and Simon have caused a divide between our communities, I think that I have seen the true character of the people of Alexandria, and my  _sons_ people today and I am going to make a judgement call. I think that you are good people, and that if there's any way we're going to stop Shane, it's going to be together."


	8. Year of 39

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Constantly confused by the geography of walking dead, have tried to find a map, failed. DC area is very confusing, made my own map, none of this is ~really~ canon.  
> -also Carl's like 16 even though I mention he was canon age when they were at the farm, so just know that I know that that doesn't make any sense.  
> -more was supposed to happen in this chapter and then Carl and Noah decided to have a ridiculously long conversation. idk how that happened

**ONE MONTH FROM END OF PREVIOUS CHAPTER**

**rick**

Rick was leaned up against the cement edge of a freeway overpass, breathing heavily and clutching a pair of binoculars against his chest.

"Gotta get across that bridge." Noah said, breathing heavily and contorting his body so he could look over the edge at the highway below.

"Good plan." Carl joked and Noah shoved against his side.

"Lets hear it then one eye, what's your grand plan?" Noah jeered and Carl rolled his eyes, taking on a tone that made it sound like the solution was very easy.

"Well you see here, limpy, we need one helicopter and one helicopter pilot." Carl explained, very matter-of-factly.

"Oh  _good,_ that's only two things we need to find. Two things isn't that much." Noah said, pushing himself off of the ground and leaning far over the edge of the overpass, trying to see as far as he could. "They should be here by now." He mumbled.

"They  _should._ Might have to make a break for it ourselves if they don't come by soon." Rick agreed, standing up again himself. "Gonna take a nap down there?" He asked Carl, raising an eyebrow.

"Pretty comfy, maybe you should learn what comfort is." Carl said back cheekily but clasped Rick's good arm, letting his dad pull him up on his feet. "Thanks." He said and took the binoculars from Rick's hands, giving them over to Noah. One of the worst parts about only having one eye is that he couldn't see through binoculars. Also he and Siddiq had found a 3-D anatomy book the other day but Carl hadn't been able to use the glasses.

They were trying to cross the Potomac, which usually wasn't a big deal, but they were taking a new bridge and this one just happened to have a  _huge_ gathering of Walkers at the mouth of it. They had a bridge North of this, but it was a huge hassle now that Alexandria was in the picture. Kingdom was equidistance between Sanctuary and Alexandria so they had no opinion on bridge usage, but there was a bridge  _in_ the city of Alexandria that crossed the potomac. It made the most sense for them to use.

There was an ulterior motive though.

Oceanside wasn't going great. They recently had a stray herd of walkers blow through and leave their crops in tatters and killing about twelve people. Of course, even if Oceanside had sent out a distress signal, it would have been an incredibly long time before any of the other communities could have helped. So Eugene had pointed out a prime location that they should be using which was the coast guard headquarters. It had sprawling amounts of buildings that worked around and into each other, forming a mostly natural wall. Eugene said that from his memory, the building had only three or four relatively small areas that would need a fence.

And the building had two huge draws on top of that, first being the numerous courtyards that were protected by the buildings themselves. Second, maybe most important, were the rooftop gardens.  _Green Roofs,_ Eugene had referred to them as. They were fertile, and the building would have irrigation systems already built in. Not to mention, it was directly bordering a body of water so Eugene was fairly certain it could be hydropowered.

The only issue? Other people had probably had the same idea as Eugene. The building was only a couple dozen miles from Hilltop, and yet they'd never driven past it, or at least never paid any mind to it.

So they had a two fold mission this time. They wanted to clear the bridge near Alexandria and then push North towards the Headquarters.

"Ah, no, I see 'em." Noah called and Rick and Carl both turned to lean over the edge.

They could hear them before they could see them. Three cars, all blasting the loudest and most garbage music they could find, driving down the road from the Potomac, about three hundred walkers in tow.

It was risky business pulling a herd this close to Alexandria, but they'd worked it out with Deanna.

There was a quarry near Alexandria that was filled up with Walkers, so they were going to coordinate moving this herd with moving that herd and draw them  _all_ away from Alexandria. Rick just had to hope that Sasha and Tyreese could handle being in charge of their end, he figured they could.

The cars were full of mostly other Alexandrians, a few from the Kingdom. Jerry was in charge down there on their side of herd diversion and they seemed to be doing a pretty good job.

"Alright, I'd say their close enough, let's make a run back for the cars." Rick said and Noah handed him back the binoculars.

"We just ran  _from_ the cars." Carl complained but Rick could tell it was just a joke. They'd stashed the cars and a few other people up a couple blocks at a Freedman's Cemetery. They'd go there, wait for the herd to pass, and then cross the bridge. The three of them had just needed to come up to the overpass silently so they'd know when to move.

It was an elite team that Rick and Negan had chosen to be the first ones to go to the Headquarters and Rick was proud to say that his son had been put on the team without any bias. Even without an eye Carl was damn good at this.

Negan, Michonne, Daryl, Glenn, Dwight, and Jesus were waiting at the cars when they finally got back, keeping a watch on any walkers who had staggered away from the herd. They couldn't hear the blasting music from here but they were close to the highway at any rate, just shrouded by a cropping of trees.

They hadn't heard from Simon or Shane in the past few weeks and Rick had been starting to feel suspicious, a little too antsy, when Eugene had sprung this idea on them. It was a good way for them to get out, and they'd left just enough fighters at each of the communities that they weren't worried about the little band of four men running through any of them again.

Rick was slightly worried though. Simon had mentioned something about having more people... But that would be seemingly impossible. Even if Simon had thought he was the only one who knew about Alexandria, Kingdom had also known. So Simon couldn't possible know about a community that they didn't also know about. Unless the community was small, and if so, they stood no chance.

"Oi! They moving the herd?" Daryl called when he saw them draw near and Rick nodded.

"Yeah, say we'd got about a thirty to forty minute wait though. Forgot how slow those things move." Rick said with a nod of his head, pulling his hat off his head and pushing his hair back out of his face.

Andy was sitting in the bed of one of the trucks, seemingly sunbathing. Cars wouldn't work for much longer and that was all for the best anyway. There was no way to reinforce the main bridges that covered the widest parts of the river, and driving cars across them would just run them down in no time. They would probably last longer than Rick's life though if they only had to withstand a few horses now and again.

"You've moved a herd before?" Carl asked, suddenly entranced and wanting to know the story.

"We have. It involved some terrifying dynamite and a lot of pushing cars around in neutral. Not all that exciting." Rick explained.

" _Dynamite?_ It sounds pretty exciting." Carl drawled out, raising both of his eyebrows.

Rick chuckled a bit. "Noah can tell you about the dynamite. I wasn't even there for that part."

And so Carl and Noah went off, Rick only heard a few parts of the story Noah was telling about Abraham's extreme heroisms and the extreme uplay of all the danger involved.

"Been a long time since we've done a sweep." Negan said as Rick came up to them. He was standing in a loose circle with everyone else, looked like they'd been having a kind of stilted conversation.

"Don't worry, we aren't retired yet." Michonne interjected. "Gotta do a lot of building clearing when you're on the road." She said.

"Yeah, don't miss that." Rick sighed thinking back to the restaurant he, Laura, Arat, Morgan, Duane, and  _Nick_ had stopped at. That had been all kinds of a mess.

"You would have never met me!" Negan said, sounding mock put out.

"And for the better that would have been." Rick said with a smug grin. There was something about this group of people that put him at ease. Maybe it was because he had his son and daughter back, maybe it was because Andy and Negan just  _put_ him in a good mood, but something about the people who had traveled with his son just felt right. He felt like he'd known Michonne forever already, like he and Daryl could basically speak without speaking, and Glenn he respected a hell of a lot more than anyone else he'd only known two months.

"Hey, how's Maggie doing at Hilltop?" Michonne asked, shifting conversation gears.

"She's great! Honestly though, I forget Kal's name half the time and she knows  _everyone._ Could probably tell you all the names of the chickens. She fits right in, I know it's gotta be the Hershel in her. I swear she's turning more and more into her dad everyday." Glenn said, sounding totally besotted with his wife. Maggie was barely six weeks pregnant now and was quite content to stay at Hilltop after the council had unanimously agreed that she would be in charge.

So, Shane and Simon hadn't  _completely_ disappeared after that day at the crossroads. They'd set up a trap at Hilltop involving a spiked out car that was rolled into the front gates at night. Kal and Eduardo swear that they didn't see who did it. But Maggie had gotten right to work and backed up a tractor over the damn thing. Needless to say, Ezekiel, Deanna, Natania, and Rick had all thought she was a shoe-in for the job. Didn't hurt that just about every citizen in Hilltop idolized her.

But since that day which had been shortly after the crossroads, it had been radio silent. No community had even caught wind of them.

"She's a good fit there. Gets along well with everyone else, but she's not afraid when her opinions differ, which is good." Rick nodded. They'd had a few meetings as the community leaders recently and Maggie was certainly holding her own.

"We should drive towards the tree line and see if they've moved past." Dwight suggested and Rick nodded, motioning for everyone to load up.

They'd brought two cars, and everyone piled into them. The sounds of the engine running attracted a few walkers, but by the time they drove down around towards the bridge, they could just see the last walkers in the herd staggering over the horizon.

So they drove the cars across, having to stop every once in a while to push a car out of the way. There were a few tents set up along the way and some hidden walkers that Daryl got with his crossbow from the back of the truck.

The road past the bridge was pretty desolate. There weren't many cars along it and Rick figured it had been evacuated early on. Basically the whole area around Hilltop was completely devoid of any life and somewhere so close to a Military Headquarters would have to be as well. All of DC really was fairly empty. Rick always wondered where all those people ended up, but then seeing herds like the one today, he understood where they went. It wasn't like any kind of evacuation had actually worked, it just displaced people into new and unknown territory that they would be less apt to survive in. If Rick could go back and do it all again without the coma, he was pretty sure he would do just what Morgan did and ignore the evacuation notice. Just sit tight in King County until everything blew over.

When they finally got to the Coast Guard Headquarters they left one car a mile or so back and then all piled into the back of the truck. It was just in case anything went  _really_ wrong.

They could see exactly what Eugene had been talking about as soon as they pulled up. The building seemed  _perfect._ Even if a lot of the exterior was glass, they could easily reinforce it. Even closing off the bottom floors for a while wouldn't be too big of a problem as it went up several stories. They could see green at the tops of each building, and they pulled the truck up just a few feet from the main entrance.

"Alright, remember, there could be survivors in here or it could be completely overrun with walkers. We'll split into four teams. Glenn and Michonne you're team Alpha on the radio. Dwight and Daryl you're bravo. Jesus and Noah, Charlie. Carl you're with Negan and I, Delta." Rick explained quickly, exiting the truck and strapping up with everyone else.

"Dad, can I go with Noah and Jesus?" Carl asked, a little quietly a kind of off to the side. Most everyone could still hear him but Carl obviously didn't want to be seen pulling favors with Rick.

"I suppose. Why?"

"Well you know, Noah's got his bad leg, if anyone should have a team of three it's them." He reasoned. Rick had already accounted for that though by placing Noah with the most adept fighter out of all of them.

Rick raised an eyebrow at him but nodded anyway.

Negan took over directions from there. "Team Alpha, you go in first, find a stairwell. Get all the way to the top and then work your way day level by level. Bravo follow suit but work your way up, hopefully you can meet in the middle. Charlie, if you head to the left there should be a door that leads to the second building. It's only two stories, move through it methodically. Give Noah time to survey anything because this is the building that would need the most reinforcing. Rick and I will head into the court yard in between all the buildings and make sure walkers aren't streaming into it. If any of you see anything that seems suspicious or overly risky just don't even try it. We'd rather pull out and try to find a different place than have anyone die for nothing in here."

After Michonne, Maggie, Dwight, and Daryl were in the building, Rick offered for Carl to take Andy.

"He'll keep quiet and alert you if there's something fishy. Just remember that he can take 'em down but doesn't know how to kill them." Rick forewarned as Carl called Andy over to his side.

"What if he gets bit?"

"He knows to avoid the teeth."

* * *

**SAME TIME**

**carl**

Jesus took up the back while Carl and Noah walked basically in line with one another in front of him. They could hear Jesus branching off and checking in on things that he deemed interesting, obviously he thought that Carl and Noah were basically fine on their own.

When they'd first walked in they heard Dwight and Daryl on the far opposite end of the hallway and then after that they were on their own.

The building wasn't overrun by any means, in fact they barely saw any walkers in the first few rooms. Noah checked out the windows in most of the rooms and noted that they were bulletproof. Some of them had long spidery crack marks in between them from being shot previously.

"The glass is a good start but we'll have to do something else on this lower level." Noah reached his hand out to touch softly at where a bullet seemed to have actually gone through a compromised section of the glass.

"Isn't it like super strong though?" Carl questioned. He looked around the room behind him. It looked like a classroom with black granite tables littering the room and two stools at each. There was a whiteboard at the top with a half erased header on it now just reading  _Biol ... 02_ on it.

"Well as far as super strong things go, bulletproof glass definitely isn't very far up there. I doubt a walker could take it out but that's not really who we're up against right now. This hole here is from a fifty caliber at  _most,_ could even be something less than that at close range. Sure the bullet isn't going to really do damage if it goes through the slow, but even then Shane's team can see where we are and this glass isn't incredibly thick. Maybe two layers of polycarbonate--I'm kind of nerding out aren't I?" Noah stopped himself and offered Carl a sheepish look.

"I mean... A little, but it was all very informative. What you're saying is that the glass would be fine for walkers, but since we're up against people who understand how it might work and know how to aim, it's not sufficient?" Carl summed it all up and rifled through some drawers in the desk. The number one rule Glenn had always instilled in him is that people hide guns  _everywhere._

"Yeah, but we don't have to do much to reinforce it. Just like a layer of sheet metal mostly to block sight. Sanctuary had windows but on the ground floor they're off the ground above our heads. We'd only potentially be worried about snipers on the higher levels. Just because this place doesn't have a fence around it I just don't want Shane and Simon to rush up shooting holes in the windows."

Carl nodded at that and then Jesus whistled, calling them back out into the hall.

"Anything in there?" He asked.

"No, nothing." Noah responded and they made their way further down, giving cursory glances into the rooms. Most of them seemed to be class rooms on the lower level. Once they got onto the second and final story though, there was a lot more activity. A few walkers milled in the hallway and looked over with interest when they heard footsteps.

"I'll take the ones in the hall, you guys check out this first room." Jesus motioned.

Andy followed them into the room and Noah pushed the door to the room so that it was almost shut. They would be able to hear if Jesus called out, but they would also be able to hear if a walker came into the room.

They were met with the sight of a walker hanging from the ceiling, obviously a suicide victim. Carl climbed up on a chair and cut him down before stabbing him. In the corner was a pile of blankets and packs that they eagerly went through. It seemed whoever had the backpacks had died early on though as most of the food was spoiled and something had spilled over the only gun that they found, causing a thin layer of fuzzy mold to grow over the handle. They both decided they didn't care that much about the gun.

"I can't believe someone would kill themselves after finding a place like this. Look around, it obviously wasn't overrun with walkers and they had food. If they made it this far..." Noah trailed off slightly and dropped the backpack to the ground, deeming it as a lost cause. There wasn't much to scavenge nowadays other than clothing. Canned food was starting to taste off, and most other shit in the world just wasn't necessary. Most of them had learned the hard way that Twinkies don't actually last forever.

"It's easy to give up when you feel like life is meaningless. I had a fried, shortly after all of this started. She was Maggie's sister, Beth Greene. I can't even remember how old I was when we met them, nine? Ten? Her family thought that the walkers weren't really dead and it was Shane who decided to open this barn that they had full of family members and friends... And Beth saw us have to put down her mom. She tried to kill herself even though we were safe from everything and had anything we could ever want. It was kept real hush hush around me but I knew what was going on. Beth lived through that, she's not alive today but still... I agree with you, I think that the world going to shit should kind of reinvigorate life, give people a purpose. But some people can't handle that new purpose." Carl shrugged as the finish to his sentiment. Noah was leaned against a wall, listening to him intently.

"It's awesome that she made it through that, I really hope that we don't have to lose anyone else that way. I know it happened a lot right at the beginning.  _A lot._ I was still living in my gated community in Virginia and it seemed like everyday we would find a new person in their house who had just decided to take every pill they had or shoot themselves. But it died down eventually when people realized that they just had to accept living like this." Noah pushed off from the wall and called Carl to venture behind him back into the hallway and into the room across the way, they did the same thing with the door. Jesus was nowhere to be seen but he hadn't made any noise to signal that he needed help.

"I feel like this new world opens up more possibilities for people to resign themselves to death, yaknow? Like they're not suicidal perse, but they don't care about what happens to themselves. It happened to a lot of people when we were on the road here. Maggie when she found out her sister Beth had died, she just kept getting into near death situations even though she was a generally safe person before that. Sasha lost someone close to her on the way here too and I still don't think she's really over it. I think that's why she volunteered to by one of the drivers to redirect the herd, it's a risky job. If her car breaks down while she has hundreds of walkers on her tail then she's dead." Carl kind of died off without a point to what he was saying but they saw that there was nothing in the room so the moved on to the next one. Up ahead in the hall they saw Jesus flitting in between rooms.

"I totally understand what you mean by that and I think I've seen it happen a little bit in everyone. Oddly enough, not Rick or Negan though, especially at the very beginning they seemed to be the two most positive people about everything. Not in an obnoxious way but they just always had a new thing to be doing, a new goal, a new place to go. It kept the rest of us going even as each one of us had our doubts about whether or not we wanted to keep going." Noah looked excited when he opened a drawer and held up a king size Snickers bar. "You want half?"

"Actually I want all of it." Carl smirked and Noah broke open the wrapping. He broke it in two but one side was obviously bigger than the other. Noah handed him the bigger piece. "I was joking you know." Carl said, accepting it all the while.

"I'm a nice person. Not a greedy candy hog."

Carl rolled his eyes and made a joking sneer at Noah. "It's super weird to hear stories about my dad like this. I haven't seen him in three years, which is a lot of time for someone to get up to something, but I have yet to hear one bad story about him. It's like you guys are all obsessed with ' _Rick Grimes_ '." Carl made air quotes around his dads name and then licked chocolate off of his fingers.

"Everyone's looking for someone to lead them except for a select few who are cut out to be the actual leaders. I've literally never heard Rick make a bad call. Maybe it was because in the beginning Rick, Abraham, and Negan all functioned in some capacity as a leader so they conferred with each other, and then we had a council at the Sanctuary. But even when I asked him simple questions like 'should I move to Oceanside and help their community or should I stay and learn more from Eugene,' he just knows the answer. Before Rosita ever got pregnant I heard her talking to him in private about whether or not she should have a baby, people just trust your dad, with everything. It's gotta be something to do with the fact that he was a Sheriff, obviously, but he always keeps us on our toes. Within his first ten minutes of meeting me he decided to take his entire group 150 miles North to try and get me home. Rick's a stand up guy and  _sure_ I've seen him do some weird, stupid, childish stuff--probably because he married a weird, stupid, childish guy--but when it comes to our safety as a group and our lives he doesn't mess around."

"He was always such a good dad too. I mean I probably remember him with rose tinted glasses because I was so little and all I had were stories my mom would tell me, but he seemed like a good guy. Shane used to tell me stories too, before he kind of stopped talking to all of us. I'm just glad that at least Judith can have a childhood with him." Carl explained and Noah nodded with a grin.

There was a quick knock at the door and then Jesus poked his head in. "Hey, you guys almost done with sharing your feelings?" He asked, raising one eyebrow, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Yeah shit sorry, we kind of forgot about clearing rooms." Noah admitted.

"It's fine, there wasn't much up here. Just got the radio from everyone else though and it seems like we're done."

Carl wondered if he would get another chance to talk with Noah like this. Their conversation seemed to flow really well and Carl hadn't had a chance to talk to anyone near his age since Beth died, and even then she was quite a bit older than him. Noah flashed him a smile before they had to head out.

* * *

**SAME TIME**

**rick**

"So, what are we going to do with it exactly?"

"I'm gonna take you out to a  _real_ nice restaurant, then we're gonna book the best hotel room I can find, and finally, we'll relax poist-coitally on a bed of rose petals and watch die hard."

Rick snorted softly at Negan who was holding a small battery powered DVD player in his hand triumphantly. "So basically we'll eat in the cafeteria with everyone else, then go to our room and watch..." Rick rifled around in one of the drawers near him, " _Hmm,_ Oh a classic of course,  _Safety Tips for the Open Sea, Coast Guard Edition._ " Rick raised and eyebrow at Negan who simply grinned and stuffed the small player into his pack.

"Sounds fucking awesome."

They were making their way slowly out of the building. There had only been one mishap and that was on Michonne and Maggie's side, but they'd radiod it in and another team had taken care of it.

About ten minutes prior basically everyone had radiod that their area was clear.

"So, you think we have a new pleace for Oceanside?" Rick asked Negan as they made their way back through the courtyard. It hadn't been crazy full of walkers, but it's definitely where a lot of them ended up, Rick hoped that they'd had the most and that everyone else didn't have any trouble with them.

"I think it's going to take some work, and we're going to have to listen to Noah talk for the hour long drive about everything he and Eugene should do, but yeah I think it might work." He said rather confidently and slung an arm around Rick's waist.

They were in a hallway and knew that the main entrance was just around the corner, but Negan stopped for a moment and cradled Rick's jaw in his hand, pulling him in for a quick kiss, nothing more than a peck really.

"What was that for?" Rick asked, letting Negan continue to stroke his thumb softly along Rick's jaw.

"I don't kiss you anywhere near enough." Was all Negan offered up as explanation. Rick leaned up and gave him one more chaste kiss.

"Are you worried about something?" Rick questioned. Negan starting to get overly affectionate and sentimental was a tell tale sign that something was nagging at him.

"I'm worried about a lot of stuff. You especially." He admitted and Rick raised both of his eyebrows.

"Worried about  _me?_ " He repeated, echoing Negan.

Negan dropped his hand down to Rick's shoulder and found himself staring into his husband's deep eyes for maybe a little too long before he responded. "You seem different since everything happened that day at the Crossroads. You've been more hands on, going out on runs like today. Just generally putting yourself out there."

Rick knew that Negan had never really had a way with words for expressing sentiments like that but Rick thought that he understood what Negan was trying to convey. "I feel responsible for some of this. Everything happening with Carl... And  _god,_ Shane. I took a lot of risks that day and maybe if I hadn't gone to Alexandria before Sanctuary I could have been there..."

"That's nonsense. Noah and Laura left the same time as you did and they got to Sanctuary long after everything had happened." Negan ran his hand down Rick's arm.

"I just... We're not in the right place to talk about this." Rick looked down, not wanting to open up about all of his fears in a hallway where everyone might even be able to hear them. "I think I made a bad call that day. I don't want to, well,  _fuck_ up again."

" _Rick,_ " Negan half crooned, half scolded. "You didn't fuck up. You have never  _fucked up._ " It sounded like Negan was going to say more but Rick shook his head and held up a hand to Negan.

"Let's get going." He said and turned to walk down the hall, leaving Negan jogging to catch up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not spoilers for 9x16 but I have to get my thoughts out (opt. reading):  
> -Negan??? h  
> -Angela Kang really knows how to surprise you without making it over the top and annoying like other season finales. This one was really a breath of fresh air especially in comparison to the season 8 finale (which should have ended one the beautiful note of Rick sitting under the tree and saying the bible quote)  
> -Winter exists? Wow, never would have guessed. For real I think the last winter really mentioned was the 'lost winter' between seasons 2 + 3  
> -Doggie! (I had the idea first!!!!)  
> -they could have explained the thing with the whisperers better because I hope I wasn't the only one kinda confused at the end and had to think for a hot min


	9. Across the Universe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the very long wait for this one! This was not the planned chapter! Originally I was just going to have a continuation of last chapter but that's not fun and weird and hard to follow! :)  
> -sorry it wasn't carl/noah  
> -also sorry for the ending. i actually didn't mean for that to happen it just kind of did....  
> -also sorry it's a leeeeetle short. awhoops

**2 YEARS, 8 MONTHS AGO**

**noah**

"Hey kid, watch your step." Noah's dad, Christopher said, as they came up on some serious road blockage. Even though they were both on foot it would have been pretty impossible to try and weave through the broken cars and smooshed walkers.

"There was a side road maybe a football field back, could take that and see if it loops around back to the highway." Noah suggested and Chris nodded, turning them both around and heading back from where they had come.

Noah followed basically anything that his dad told him to do, it wasn't like he had any better ideas than his dad did. They were headed to Atlanta because of his dad, so Noah didn't speak up all that often. Just small things, like pointing out a road they could double back to.

And this was all in the hopes of finding an uncle that Noah had never even met before. Apparently some kind of survival nut that Chris swore was still alive in his home made doomsday bunker. Noah was pretty sure that they didn't want anyone with a home made doomsday bunker on their side, that just invited some weird kind of crazy along with them.

"It's getting dark, keep track of your steps." Chris warned as they turned down the side road. His dad was kind of a survivalist too if he was being fair, but nowhere near whatever this uncle was like. His mom certainly would not have allowed any kind of bunker installed in the backyard. He could already hear her voice shrieking ' _what would the neighbors think?'_

"On it." Noah answered.

They wandered down the road for a while, not really going by anything of note. It seemed like a forest management trail, maybe for the local game warden of forest service people.

Eventually a motion censor light came on as they were walking, causing both of them to jump. Must be one hell of a battery to come on during the apocalypse, that or someone had run a generator around here recently.

It seemed to be the latter as they could both hear the tell tale noises of walkers shuffling.

"Noah get on top of the car, high ground." Chris offered and Noah dutifully climbed on top of a parked truck aiming his .22 towards the direction of the noises.

"I've got you covered."

Chris held up a hand to signal no more talking as he walked towards the noises and then disappeared into the shadow. He felt uncomfortable when he couldn't see his dad anymore, and held the gun tense in his hand, finger already on the trigger even though he wasn't ready to shoot anything.

There was shout from the darkness and then his dad emerged followed by four walkers hot on his tail. His dad was bleeding from a wound on his neck and Noah froze for a second, realizing what had happened.

"Shoot kid!" His dad shouted but the sudden noise made his stutter and the gun slipped out of his hands and onto the forest floor. Chris collapsed to the ground and the walkers surrounded him. They were too close for Noah to be able to jump down and grab the gun.

So his only mode of survival was to cup his hands around his mouth and scream " _HELP"_ hoping that beyond all odds, someone would hear him.

**2 YEARS, 6 MONTHS AGO**

If the world hadn't gone to shit, then Noah would probably be in his college dorm by now. He didn't have a clear sense of how long it had been since the start of the apocalypse, or really what season it was, but he was pretty sure that freshman orientation had come and passed.

In a way, he was a little glad. It wasn't like he wanted to go to school for four more years just to do.. What? A county job?

In another way, a much larger way, he was incalculably sad. He would definitely take a desk job for one more day with his family.

The the first couple weeks after they left his old community, it felt like he didn't even really want to go on. There wasn't a point. He also felt like it was his fault.

He'd already had a couple of long talks with Rick about everything that had happened and Noah really appreciated it. He didn't expect the man who'd had his arm taken off because of his stupidity to be so open. But Rick had explained to him very simply that whether or not Noah and his father had been at the community when it was attacked, two people probably weren't going to do the trick, and at least he was still there to carry on their memory.

It sometimes didn't really seem like it, but after Arat, Duane was closest in age to him, so Noah spent a lot of time reading the kid books and had actually been pretty successful in teaching him multiplication. Morgan seemed glad to have someone like Noah around, someone who was willing to help all the time. But Noah still felt like a burden.

He'd promised this group,  _salvation,_ basically. And instead, their leader was now down an arm. Even as they continued their useless march to Washington D.C, Noah often wondered what exactly he had to offer this group. Arat and Laura were strong, Duane had an excuse because he was so young, and even without an arm, Rick was a fucking badass.

So Eugene found him one day while he was sitting up against a tree a little ways away from where everyone else was. He wasn't crying, but he definitely wasn't acting in any way  _manly._ He was just thinking about what his life meant now and who he was going to be.

Eugene seemed like he was trying to wander away somewhere, and Noah kind of understood it. Everyone was pretty pissed at him after everything had come out about his lie and the atmosphere when he was around was super tense.

Noah ate by himself pretty often too as everyone else had already seemed to pair off into their own little groups. There was Dwight, Simon, and Sherry who ate together. Rosita and Abraham. Laura, Arat, Morgan, and Duane themselves, honestly they would probably be fine with him if he sat there too, but he just felt so  _alienated._ Then of course Rick and Negan usually ate in one of the cars with their legs kicked up on the dash and Andy smooshed in between them.

"Hello." Eugene said, stopping for a moment to offer Noah a nod.

"Hey man." Noah said back, raising a lazy hand up to him.

Eugene seemed like he was going to walk away, even took a few steps carrying on his way, but then he stopped in his tracks and clenched a book tight in his hand, fingers fanning over the cover of it.

"Sometimes, when I feel like no one else wants to talk to me, which is quite recent of late seeing as how my world-class lie has come to an end and no one wants to be in cohorts with me any longer, I get to reading." Eugene explained and the book in his hand shook just a little.

"Don't got no books." Noah shrugged his shoulders, but appreciated Eugene's sentiment. He hadn't really talked to the man before and it was nice of him to kind of step up and offer him help.

Eugene flipped the book in his hand for a moment and then took a step towards Noah, holding it out towards him. "Here, I have plenty."

Noah looked at the cover for a moment and raised his eyebrows. "The uh,  _Advanced Irrigation Techniques of the Aztecs volume II_?" Noah questioned, trying to hold in a short laugh, Eugene probably didn't think it was funny.

"It may sound dense, but I can assure you that once you get to chapter two and really start to understand the central circle equation that was used it gets quite interesting."

"Thanks man, I'll give it a read."

And Noah did read it, and once he finished that, he asked for volume I.

* * *

**TWO YEARS, FIVE MONTHS AGO**

"Ay Eugene! Picked up this book round the way and thought it could come in handy!" Noah swooped himself into the pseudo office that Eugene had set up for himself. There was one gigantic work desk where Eugene had all of his books and ideas spread around, a bulletin board stood behind him, and about twenty packets of instant coffee on the floor next to him.

Noah had drawn in one single arm chair where he would sit and read and occasionally offer advice to Eugene, but the man still seemed like he didn't want to entirely open up to Noah. But Noah had finally found something that he was good at, that he got  _super_ easily and never would have known about if it was still the old world. There was not one single scenario in the old world that would call for him reading  _The Structural Fundamentals of Post-War Factories._

"Care to elaborate?" Eugene asked, setting down a pen he had been using to sketch out a new animal pen.

"It's a book about the structure of buildings basically just like this, it was stashed away in the boiler room. Anyway, the building has raft foundation with rubble as the primary source. But get this, that's only for the smaller left building that was put up after the rest of the construction. The  _rest_ of the building has a deep strap trench fill with concrete." He summed up quickly.

"Which means that we don't have to build the fences out, we just have to get rid of that building." Eugene concluded.

"Yeah! It should be like super easy, well not  _super_ easy but the metal sheets of the walls could come in handy, and the rubble is just directly on top of soil, albeit, shitty soil, but that could be fixed.

"Hold on, let me find my megaphone and then we'll go downstairs."

"I also drew up some plans for crops." Noah shuffled around in some loose drafting paper that was shoved in the cover of the book as Eugene slung the megaphone around his neck from a lanyard.

Eugene held out his hand for them and Noah passed them over. It was a few tense minutes as Eugene stared at them and Noah was sure that he'd probably done everything wrong and they were complete garbage.

"What's this bit right here, in the red?" Eugene pointed to a section as they walked down the hall.

"Oh the thick line is the main walkway, thinner ones are just paths." He explained.

"Why?"

Noah wasn't really expecting that question and he furrowed his brows for a moment. "Just, so people can walk through? This path will lead directly to the front gate and I didn't want the crops getting tramples. Plus, curb appeal yaknow? Little paths, spices it up a little." Noah realized a little too late that he should have stopped at the practical function and not the other reasons.

To his surprise though, Eugene almost, kind of smiled. "I see. And this building to the side? That's not there now is it?"

"Well that's actually two buildings. One of them is a shed for all of our supplies and the other is a greenhouse. Sherry said she was a botanist so I figured we could grow some cool stuff with it. I have plans for those buildings on the other papers."

"This is, uh, really good Noah. You should pull another desk into my office instead of that chair."

Noah cracked a wide smile. "That mean I'm getting a promotion boss?"

"I suppose it does, welcome aboard partner. Pay isn't any better  _but_ the ladies will love you." Eugene said, without even cracking a smile.

"Eugene  _Porter,_ 'sthat a joke man?" Noah laughed heartily but Eugene didn't say anything else.

* * *

**ONE YEAR, TEN MONTHS AGO**

"Hey, are you the guy Rick and Negan sent over?" A girl asked, probably just a year or two younger than Noah. And  _damn_ was she pretty.

Noah had driven a jeep up to Oceanside with a few rolls of drafting paper and his general tools for drawing up a plan. They were going to put in solar in Oceanside and Eugene had delegated him to be in charge of that.

"Oh, uh yeah, for the panels."

"Man this is so weird, like calling someone to come fix your TV." She joked and Noah was pretty sure her smile was the prettiest part of her... But her eyes were nice too... Everything about her was really nice.

He cracked a bit of a laugh and played along for a moment. "Now ma'am, did you try turning it on and off again?" He asked, trying to pretend to be serious.

She offered a laugh in return and Noah was highfiving himself in his mind. "I'm Cyndie by the way, Natania's grand daughter." She held out her hand for him to shake and he took it very gently in his own.

"Noah, solar panel extraordinaire." He said with a very overly confident wink at the end of it. "Is there someplace I could set up my tools and everything?" He asked her and she nodded immediately.

"Totally, I hope you don't mind but we don't have a ton of extra space so it's just the living room in mine and my grandmas house, you can have the couch and we'll try to stay out of your business." She explained and walked around to the back of his jeep. "Anything I can grab for you?"

"Oh no, I wouldn't want to make you carry my stuff." He interjected but she'd already grabbed one of the heavier tool boxes and a roll of drafting table. "Nevermind then, I'll just have you take everything." He said with a smirk and grabbed the ladder from the back along with his drafting utensils. He followed her lead to the simple fishing lodge that he would apparently be staying in for the duration of his time there. He wasn't entirely sure how long he would be at Oceanside. He'd told Eugene to expect him back no later than a week.

Honestly he  _couldn't_ take any longer since the panels were being put up back home. He didn't really need to be there for the installation, but getting them on some semblance of a grid he would be necessary for. So he would be here for anywhere up to a week.

"So, did you go to school for this kind of stuff?" Cyndie asked, pushing open the door to her house and beckoning him inside. She gently set everything down on the floor of the living room. Noah left the ladder outside before following her in and saw that the couch was already decked out with blankets and pillows and anything he would need, even a fresh towel sat on the coffee table.

"No, I hadn't even graduated highschool before this all. I was going to go to college for computer software but I didn't really have a passion for it. Wasn't even all that smart in school, I just started reading books after there was nothing else to do and now here I am. Second guy in a two of a kind job." He explained.

"That's so cool." Cyndie said, sounding really honest about it and taking a seat on the couch where his blanket was spread out, patting the seat next to her. Noah sat at the other end, not confident in whether or not he smelled good enough to be sitting right next to her. "Some of the guys around here are handy you know, but none of them could put up solar panels on a barely high school degree."

"Oh, I also helped put together the irrigation system back home too, that was pretty interesting." He explained, but then realized just how uninteresting irrigation sounded after it came out.

"Aren't you guys like really far inland though? How did you get that to work?" She asked, sounding actually, genuinely interested in what he was walking about, she was even sitting forward with her elbows on her knees.

"Well it's all about rudimentary circle math, you see, the Aztecs actually figured a lot of that out."

" _Really?_ You know I was always a sucker for geometry, maybe you could explain it to me?"

* * *

**ONE YEAR, NINE MONTHS AGO**

"This is it?" Abraham asked, peering into the car window.

"Unfortunately, yes." Dwight responded as he very gently pulled the door of the car open.

"Well, there's no crystallization on it so that's kind of good." Noah rationalized as they all stared at the dynamite for a moment. All three of them sweating tensely.

"Looks like a god damn Cuban." Abraham said and reached his hand out towards one of the sticks. Noah slapped his hand away.

"You  _want_ to die? Precision dude." Noah reminded and Abraham nodded, suring himself and holding out both of his index fingers, locking them securely on either side of a stick of the dynamite.

Once Abraham had the dynamite pinched tightly between his fingers, and they were all kind of sure that they weren't going to die, they helped Abraham pile into the back of the truck and then Dwight took off at a snail's pace towards the herd.

"So Noah, how are things with you and Cyndie going?" Dwight asked after a few moments, trying to calm the feeling of impending death that they all had in their minds.

Noah let out a long and drawn out sigh. "She broke up with me."

"What? You've only been dating for like a month." Dwight brought up, which caused another long sigh from Noah.

"Whirlwind romances are often fated to end in tragedy." He lamenting, in a very fake waxing voice.

"Stop, man, don't make me laugh." Abraham said from the back seat, his stomach very tense as he tried not to laugh out loud.

"Whirlwind romance my ass, didn't you even get her in bed?" Dwight cracked a grin at Noah's obvious suffering, but also acutely aware that if Abraham did start laughing that could all die horribly.

"We got to second base."

"You gotta touch her tits? Over or under the bra?" Dwight watched Noah squirm in his seat a little and then turn as red as someone with his complexion could.

"Well no... We just kissed a couple of times." He admitted.

"You  _kissed._ Noah, what do you think first base is?" Dwight sounded like he wheezed on the word 'kissed'.

"Guys you have to stop, I'm shaking." Abraham called from the back and Noah rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, laugh all you want at my pain. At my love lost." He laughed at his own words but they didn't bring it up again on the drive.

* * *

**ONE MONTH AGO**

"Shit is crazy." Noah mentioned, having to basically yell the words over the sound of the motorcycle and the wind whipping around them at fast speeds.

"Yeah! We haven't had like  _any_ drama for what, years?" She called back. They were making their way back to the Sanctuary to let everyone back there know what all had transpired. "Only drama for us is yours and Cyndie's tumultuous love life!" She called back.

"Not tumultuous right now! We're broken up again." He reminded her and she let out a long laugh. He and Cyndie were good friends, just sometimes they decided that they should start dating again, and it never really ended well. Maybe because they lived like four hours apart and rarely saw each other. Actually, that was mostly it. Almost entirely.

"Ay! You see that movement over there?"

They were almost back to the Sanctuary and just to the far edges of the forest they saw several figured moving among the trees a couple miles into the fields around them.

"Yeah! Should we stop?" He called and was ready to grab his gun, unsure of who they were.

"No don't wanna ruin a plan if Rick or Negan is up to something!" She responded but Noah eyed the figured very suspiciously as they went by. Something about them seemed off, but there were quite a few of them and they only had one gun between the two of them. There wasn't anything they would be able to do, but still Noah kind of had a gut feeling that they should have at least tried to figure out who they were.

And when they got back to the Sanctuary, neither of them mentioned that they had definitely seen the people that killed Abraham, and that would certainly come back to bite them in the ass.

* * *

**NOW**

"Hey Carl! Meet Cyndie." Noah introduced. They were about halfway to the new Oceanside, moving literally everyone all at once and Noah had just joined the caravan from doing some work at Hilltop.

Oceanside was the smallest community, so it only took a couple trucks and a lot of people on foot to transport them all, and so far everything seemed to be going well.

"Hey, nice to meet you." Carl reached over Noah to shake her hand and smiled at her.

"Yeah! I heard about you, Rick's son, that's pretty awesome." She gushed. That had been the sentiment of most people that Carl had met recently, but he didn't really mind. At least being Rick Grimes' son was a good thing and most people decided that they liked him immediately after hearing that.

"So, you here to set up solar panels on the new place?" Cyndie asked Noah and he shook his head.

"Naw, one of the reasons we chose it, it actually already runs mostly on solar. Can't put the whole place online yet but for the most part you guys shouldn't have any reason to be spread out. Later on when we have more people I'll probably put some up." He explained.

"Oh yeah, wasn't Negan saying something about putting new people here instead of at Sanctuary?" Carl interjected and Noah nodded.

"Yeah, since we've been taking every new person recently. Vetting them, then figuring out what community they would be best at, we're just kind of running out of room and this new place more than doubles how many people we can have." That was what the leaders had come up with at least, plus he had been involved a bit in that decision.

"Oh, who's in charge of that at Sanctuary?" Cyndie inquired.

"I mean, I could give a brief history lesson of the Sanctuary, but basically it used to be new people went up to a panel at Sanctuary, then they went before all the leaders, and  _then_ they were put in a community. We kind of expedited that process by putting ten people on a council, but only three need to be sitting to vet someone when they're new. Then Maggie, Natania, Ezekiel, and I guess Deanna now, just kind of agrees with their decision. So we'll set something up at the new place like that."

"Speaking of history lessons, have you shown Carl  _The Book_ yet?" She asked in a very teasing voice and Noah very lightly shoulder checked her.

"I didn't want to bore him, like I so terribly bored you." He explained, shrugging his shoulders a bit.

"Okay you didn't  _bore_ me, you just forced me to read your exceptionally long, very dry book in front of you while I edited spelling. The whole situation was just boring by default."

"Okay, now I  _gotta_ know, what The Book?" Carl interjected, stopping their friendly banter.

"I decided to just chronicle the history of Sanctuary, Kingdom, Hilltop, and Oceanside. Haven't gotten around to Alexandria yet. And it may or may not be like six hundred pages long. Typed it all out on a type writer." Noah bashfully admitted.

"Dude, that's actually kind of cool. I couldn't mind reading that myself." Carl said almost immediately. He wanted to know more about the Sanctuary especially since that part would talk about his dad. But the whole thing sounded like something good to know.

"It's really not that interesting just-"  _ **BOOM.**_ A rifle shot off from off in the surrounding city and blood from Noah's exploded head showered Carl.


	10. Beast of Burden

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can i get an uh,,,, Idea  
> -why did noah die? bc i said so  
> -chapter is short but dense

**FOUR DAYS LATER**

**rick**

"When I first met Noah, the group up to that point was tired, our pilgrimage to Washington D.C was tedious at best, and we just needed something else to think about it. So when we stumbled upon him, kicking walkers away from him from the roof of a car, I saw him as a means to and end. A kid who had lost everything and wanted our help on a mission that seemed  _noble._ When Negan first met me, he had witnessed me kill an attempted rapist, the first human I had killed, and he told me that he trusted me because there weren't enough people nowaday that would sacrifice their own lives to stop something like that. But just like how my seemingly altruistic deed for Noah had ulterior motives, perhaps that reason I killed that man on that night was because I just didn't like him, he was a complete asshole, and I had finally found my window to get rid of him. Every decision that we make today is squarely meant to ensure our own survival. Charity, humanitarianism, selflessness- all traits that I can't say I always possessed, nor do I think any of you could say you've always shown.

"Noah lived and breathed these things. The most humble, kind, and self-sacrificing person I have  _ever_ met, before and after. A lot of people standing here didn't know Noah as personally, maybe you knew him as Eugene's side-kick or just the kid who installs your solar panels. That's not all that Noah was, in fact, sorry Eugene, but Noah was the smartest person I ever knew. We're standing in this garden today because Noah decided to read a book on how the fucking foundation of the factory was built and then plan out how to demolish a wing of it.  _Noah_ came up with that. And Noah didn't just install the solar panels. It was one of our earliest council meeting, back when we had maybe thirty people, and someone had brought up the idea of solar energy. Everyone in the room, of course, looked at Eugene, he's that one that had proved himself to us so far. I'll never forget, Eugene turned to Noah and just told him to figure out solar power. I never thought it was gonna get done! But the very next meeting, Noah had already figured it out and he was ready to implement it.  _Nothing_ Noah did was for his own personal gain, he loved helping people.

"And so we stand today, well past dark, but with the lights still shining down on us, because of Noah. Many of you know that Noah was writing a history of all the communities, and it was almost done with he died. I took the time to read it between then and now, and there were only four mentions of himself in all six hundred plus pages. I'm pretty sure my damn dog was mentioned more. He didn't mind that he didn't get the credit, he'd probably be mad at me for making this speech, but he deserves it. He deserved so much more, and I only wish he could have been around to realize it."

When Rick brought his head up from the subtle prayer that he had done with everyone in attendance, he walked away from the small wooden podium mechanically, as Eugene, the closer, brought up behind him. And Rick didn't stop walking.

He made his way around the edge of the crowd and no one stopped him, he realized a some point that Negan was trailing behind him, but he was used to that. Andy was laying in the dirt across the lawn, looking very tired. He'd been a different dog since Abraham had died, and now that Noah was gone he was even worse. Everything was worse.

As soon as Rick entered the cafeteria, completely empty, he turned and punched the wall beside him as hard as possibly, feeling shoots of pain arc through his shoulder. And then he squared his shoulders and punched the wall again, and again. The wall was bloodied and so was his hand, but he wasn't going to stop, didn't know how long he would do this for.

Finally, Negan grabbed his forearm and squeezed so forcibly that Rick's fist was forced to drop open.

"Stop." Negan said plainly and then let go of Rick's arm.

He punched the wall one more time in defiance, this time more cognizant and able to feel the ridiculous pain that shot through his fingers, making his stomach contract uncomfortable. Then he turned away from the wall and paced towards one of the cafeteria tables. He took a seat momentarily, and then stood back up, incapable of sitting still.

"This what you want to do then? Just walk around and hit things?" Negan asked sarcastically and Rick fixed him with a glare.

"Fuck off." He said and pushed the door back open, walking out into the night air. He could hear Eugene talking about something Noah had done, some funny story that made people laugh while they cried. Rick didn't give a shit.

" _Rick! Get back here!"_ Negan whisper-shouted, not wanting Rick to cause a disturbance for everyone trying to mourn Noah.

Rick kept walking off towards the gates to The Sanctuary, and soon after Andy picked up on his heels. Rosita turned from where she was in the back of the crowd and looked at the two of them in concern, but Negan waved her away.

Leaning up against the wall of the Sanctuary, Negan found Rick sitting on the ground with his head in his hands.

For a long while Negan just stood silently, leaned up against the wall next to Rick. Then he sat down, and then he slung an arm over Rick's shoulders.

"Tell me." Rick muttered finally, his voice sounding wet, and he followed up with a long sniffle.

"Tell you what?"

"What happened. Again."

"You've heard it enough times."

"Again."

Negan sucked in a long breath and looked away from Rick towards the lights still on in the courtyard. Negan had been in the caravan helping transport Oceanside, he'd seen everything go down. Oceanside was basically bled dry, and the new space was all but abandoned.

"I was taking up the back. Dianne and Clyde were in the front where the bulk of the civilians were. We had situated Oceanside's best fighters throughout the crowd, maybe every five people someone was armed. Cyndie, Carl, and,  _Noah,_ were in almost the direct center, in between the wagons and the crowd. Noah wasn't supposed to be there, he was on his way form Hilltop to Sanctuary and decided to join the group. That's what Carl and Cyndie said at least. Glenn, Aidan, and I were all at the very back on horses. There were maybe only twelve civilians at most situated in the back of the caravan as wagon drivers and guards. Which left fifty people at the front. It was just after midday and-Rick, I can't tell you this again." Negan paused. Rick had already heard this exact same story not two days ago.

"You can." After Negan seemed as if he was going to make due on his threat and actually quit talking, Rick added: "please. I need to hear it again."

Negan grit his teeth but continued. "The first shot came from the South and from the screams within the group we knew immediately that someone had been hit. I dismounted from my horse and Glenn yelled for me to make it to the treeline that we had just come out of while he and Aiden rode ahead. We'd just entered a clearing, it was maybe only a mile long and surrounded by forest on every side, but there were long fields so we knew that they either had a scoped rifle or were just firing blindly with semi-automatics. All the people that I saw had regular rifles without scopes, but Noah's death had been so clean, they'd meant to kill him. I would-would assume that they did. You told me that day after the crossroads, the list of people that Simon gave you: Morgan, Noah, me, and Abraham. Those were the people he wanted to kill. Well he's got half of them. Anyway, after Noah was killed, more gunfire started to come from the trees. Glenn and Aiden successfully got everyone to disperse North, abandon the wagons and just run for it. We didn't know that we were in their trap. North of us was an apple orchard, we didn't see them hiding behind the trees until they were already shooting. I was in the treeline by that time and when I worked my way back to the South where the original gunfire and found just about eight people clearing out. I killed two, the others didn't try to return fire, just kept running. I didn't recognize any of them.

"Glenn was to the North, he said that trying to control the chaos was like trying to redirect a fucking herd in the middle of a circus. People ran every direction, Glenn tried to pull them East towards the Coast Guard so we could try and get them to Kingdom maybe. He got about twenty people to follow and told Aiden and Dianne to keep them on the road and moving. The was successful. Glenn stayed behind with the others fighters and tried to take down some of the attackers, but they simply repeated what had happened to me. Suddenly, all of the enemies just turned tail and ran back into the forest. Cyndie helped us take a body count afterwards and altogether we killed maybe eighteen of them, but there seemed like impossibly more. They looked like one solid line retreating into the trees. We don't have an accurate body count for Oceanside, twenty, maybe thirty are left, but new survivors are still being found. I don't know if you heard that Clyde just showed up in Kingdom this morning, he'd gotten shot in the leg but he's going to be fine.

"After the majority of the killing Glenn, Dianne, Carl, and I followed the attackers into the treeline. We walked for miles, fearing with every step that we were just falling further into the trap. But it wasn't a trap, they had truly just  _dispersed._ They were like smoke. We decided not to continue pursuing them once we reached the next field, it seemed like we would be able to track them but none of us were confident in our tracking abilities. We stayed at the edge of that field for more than five hours as Glenn jumped on his horse and went to get Daryl from the Hilltop so we could find out where they had all gone. In the waiting period however, we were suddenly overtaken by a herd of walkers borne from the earlier gunfight. We had no choice but to run through the field and trample most of the trail, there were too many walkers for us to take on. The three of us circled back around to the road to find Glenn and Daryl just about to enter the forest. We called them off and told them it was a lost cause.

"We walked back to the road to make a quick sweep through for anything that may have been left behind, and we found that one of the few bodies that hadn't reanimated was Noah's. I could only recognize that it was his because I'd seen his coat earlier. His head was... Gone. Somebody had come out of the forest and left a note on his body that read:-"

Rick cut him off, clutching the very same note in his hand. "I know what it said."

He stood up suddenly and shoved the note back in his pocket. It was almost unreadable now from how much his sweat drenched hands had clutched at it, folded and unfolded it. Only he, and the people that had found it had read the note, Rick hadn't let anyone else see it. "You said that you, Carl, and Dianne circled back to the road. Did you run into trouble when you did that?"

"No, in fact we found an old farm road that led us right back." Negan explained.

Rick drew his lips to the sighed and nodded, he would need some time to think.

* * *

" _Morgan, Morgan, wake up."_ Rick whispered, shaking the mans shoulder slightly and trying to rouse him.

It was nearing one in the morning, everyone had gone to bed hours ago when the funeral had ended, and Rick had made sure that Negan was asleep before slipping out.

Morgan immediately looked panicked when he sat up in bed. "What is it?" He asked and reached over to flip his bedside lamp on.

"I'm going after Simon. I want you to come with me." Rick said plainly. He had an idea of where they might be, and there was no one he trusted more right now to help him than Morgan. That wasn't to say that he didn't trust Negan, the man sometimes just tried to dissuade him from acting irrationally. Not that this was entirely irrational. Rick just needed to get them a win. They couldn't keep taking losses, morale was already plummeting.

He rubbed at his eyes for a moment, getting used to the new lighting, but nodded as he did so. "We taking anyone else?"

"No, just us."

"Good," Morgan said as he got out of bed. "More people would just slow us down."

Rick gave them man a moment to get dressed and grab his gear. Morgan was a good pick because he was a runner, always had a backpack ready and had dibs on one of the last reliable cars that they had. They hadn't worked together in a long time, months, but rick knew that they did work well together from the earliest days. Morgan was a follower, but he was one with common sense and he would speak up if Rick was making a bad call.

"You drive, I'll explain the plan on the way."

The first part of the drive was silent, Rick was simply staring at a map with a tiny key chain flashlight as he gave Morgan confusing and muddled directions. He had two spots circled on the map that seemed like possible places Simon and Shane could be at. Rick had gotten a little bit more information from Negan on exactly what the terrain had looked like, and he was fairly certain that the attackers had similarly circled back. Negan said that when they'd come upon the field, it was crop for miles, there was not really anymore tree cover for a while, but that some of the grass had been trampled.

The map he'd found was an old forest service one that showed the field going on for a lot longer than Negan had thought. In fact, Rick reckoned it would have been almost impossible for a group as large as what Negan claims they were to have all run through the field and to the next treeline without being seen, not unless  _all_ of them were sprinters. But there were  _two_ roads on either side of the forest that would lead back North from where they'd come from, so the bulk of them could have circled around, while only a choice group of the fastest runners had gone straight through the field to create a false track.

"There's a junkyard here." Rick tapped on the map and Morgan leaned over to see a big red circle around the spot. "And a movie theater here. Those two spots seem the most likely to have been majorly deserted and locked down at the time of the outbreak, while still being big enough to hold a substantial amount of people. Thoughts?"

"I'd say movie theater, can't imagine Simon living in no dump." Morgan said with a quick nod and then Rick put the flashlight away. They would be able to get near enough the theater and then they'd have to go on foot so the car lights wouldn't ruin their surprise.

"Why do you think Simon's doing this?" Rick asked after they were quiet for another long moment. He had come up with plenty of his own answers, but none of them really made sense. None of this really made sense, Simon had never once voiced any actual qualms with the community. He barely even helped get everything set up. He'd been offered a seat on the council and had actually declined.

"You know that election we had months ago where you were basically unanimously voted to be in charge? Well, I don't know why, but Simon got it in his head that he and the girls, Laura and Arat, had some kind of rapport. Like they were friends or confidants or something, so he talked to them a lot. They ended up telling me about most of the conversations that they had with him and... They were pretty fucked up. I don't really remember why we never told you guys any of this, it just all seemed to trivial, nothing we needed to worry about. Obviously you were going to be in charge, so who cared about Simon's weird ideas right? Well anyway, he told them that if it were up to him, he wouldn't let anyone in the community that was sick, elderly, disabled, or under twelve. He basically wanted to create an entire community based off of the principle 'survival of the fittest'. The girls brought up to him that would mean 'well Rick and Duane wouldn't have been allowed in the community' and Simon spewed some shit about having standards, and sure  _some_ people are exceptions but the vast majority of them aren't." Morgan took a sip from a water bottle before continuing. "Anyway, as I said, the girls and I didn't really think anything of it. Eventually you won and we thought that was the end of it, but then he pulled Laura aside a few months ago so he could talk to her privately. I saw him flag her down so I stayed in the area, he gave me the creeps and those girls are like my daughters, I didn't want him talking to them. They talked for a long time, and when she finally came out she seemed kind of unbothered by what he had said and relayed the conversation to me. He said that it didn't matter he had lost the election, there would always be another one and when he was in charge there would be a lot of changes. He then asked if he still had her support and she admitted that she'd voted for Rick, and would also vote for Rick in the next election. She said that he got really quiet and she was scared, but then he just told her that he was sorry to hear that but 'that's how democracy works I guess' and then he said he'd see her around. But I think he was trying to recruit her into his damn militia."

Rick sat back in his seat, stewing over everything that Morgan had said, it was a lot to process. Of course he wished that this had all come out a long time ago so that they couldn't kept better tabs on Simon instead of just letting him run around to all the communities and make, apparently a lot of, friends. He wondered how many other people Simon had trusted with this information. "Did Simon ever mention anything about what he would do with these people that were already in communities?"

Morgan shook his head quickly. "Not explicitly, but I've been on runs with that man and seen him shoot before asking questions a few too many times. I wouldn't put it past him to at least kick people out. I don't know where he got all of these ideas, a community like that doesn't even make sense. If everyone's a fighter, who does the other jobs?"

"There are no other jobs if they just maraud all the other communities. There's a leader and followers, that's it, end of structure." Rick said and ran a hand over his face. "Damnit, that  _is_ fucked up."

* * *

There was a light on in the theater, their first sign that they had made the right decision. The car had been abandoned several blocks back and though the sun was just starting to crest over the horizon, they were still mostly obscured.

"Do we go in fast or smart?" Morgan asked. They were crouched in an alley across from the place. It was a pretty big cinema, probably had at least five screening rooms around the main concessions and tickets. Most of the glass windows and doors had roll bars pulled down over them, but the front door had a window towards the top, and light streamed out of that.

"There's probably roof access somewhere. We should try to find that." Rick suggested.

They moved along the shadows, slipping around the sides of the theater. There was a back door with on guard posted at it. The guard looked bored and tired and wasn't wearing any type of armor. Thirty feet away from the guard was the ladder, partially obscured by a dumpster. The guard was leaned against the wall and not looking any direction other than straight ahead, so Rick and Morgan were able to run from an alleyway to the dumpster, both crowding behind it for cover.

Rick peeked his head out from behind it and saw that the guard had glanced in their direction, but then quickly looked away, not thinking anything of the slight noise they had made. He urged Morgan up the ladder first, it would be a harder climb for Rick with only one hand, but he could do it.

Morgan made quick work of the ladder and Rick was slower behind him, but they didn't make any noise and their black clothing blended in with the night, the guard didn't notice them.

Once they got on the roof they noticed four hatches spread out across the top. Rick couldn't begin to guess what each one of them led into, they would just have to hope the it would be the one that they needed.

They tried to find a central hatch so that they wouldn't just be directly above a theater. The hatch wasn't hard to get open, and it surprisingly didn't creak at all as they pulled it up just a tiny bit. A cleaver of light cut through the night like a signal and Rick quickly leaned over the opening so that he could block some of the light and see inside.

His heart stuttered in his chest slightly. It was a projection room, very small and with three candles providing the only light. A figure slept on the floor surrounded by blankets, on the floor next to him was a sheriff's deputy badge. It was Shane's room.

Rick closed the hatch and looked at Morgan.

"It Shane, Simon's second in command. We could take him prisoner." Rick suggested immediately. He didn't know how they would get Shane to go down the ladder with them quietly, maybe they could convince him that they had more people waiting to attack... Rick just didn't know, there were a lot of what ifs.

"Are you saying that because you think it's the best option or because he used to be your friend?"

Rick thought about that for a moment. They were on a bit of a deadline if they were going to take him hostage, they would need to do it before the sun rose all the way or else sneaking would become a lot harder. Killing Shane in his sleep would immediately eliminate a major player on the board... But he could know something about Simon's plans, who all those damn people were who attacked them, maybe Rick could finally learn why Shane would do something like this. Why Shane would put Carl's life in danger.

So perhaps it was only fueled by personal gain when Rick said: "we're taking him prisoner."


	11. Presumed Loved

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, did ya miss me? it's been like three months!! crazy stuff.  
> I had terrible writers block for this story, but I've recently been re-watching season 9 and it's just such a shit-show that I was inspired to write more on this bad boy.  
> -tbh this is maybe my favorite thing I've ever written, and I really care about quality, so that's why chapters for this one just can't come as often yaknow? But I kind of have an idea for how things are going to go. Still no end in sight, and I'm thinking there might be another arc (the whisperers) after this current one. So 10+ more chapters.  
> (sorry this is a long AN, but if you guys like this fic I encourage you to check out my other fics, namely: 'daryl and rick against the world' and 'in my past life,' they both have similar pacing and style to this fic! xoxo)

**TWO WEEKS LATER**

**rick**

"Morgan, are you with me?" Rick asked, coming up on the man from behind and putting a hand on his shoulder. They were in an empty corridor in The Sanctuary, and Rick spoke in a hushed tone.

Morgan froze in his steps and seemed to tense up for a moment before finally turning to face Rick. He took in a deep breath before speaking next. "I don't think I can Rick. There's a run going out to the museum of natural history today to try and get a plow for Earl Sutton back at Hilltop. It uh, it seems important so I'm headed out right now for that." Rick took note of the fact that Morgan was dressed in Kingdom armor, so he obviously wasn't lying.

"Next time then." Rick said with a nod, but as he turned away Morgan grabbed his forearm and forced him to stay put.

"Rick could we maybe talk for a minute? I promise it won't take long."

"Yeah of course Morgan, what's on your mind?"

Morgan looked anxious for what he was about to say and quickly peered down both sides of the hallway before finally speaking. "Rick, you've always had a level head, and I don't think I've ever disagreed with a major decision of yours, but there's just something about you recently that seems... Impulsive."

"We've been waging a war here, of course I'm making different decisions." Rick interjected and Morgan shook his head.

"No, Negan's been waging a war. You've been... Hiding or talking to Shane. I mean, Rick, Negan hasn't even been home for the past few weeks, and neither has almost any other fighter from The Sanctuary. I just came back to see Duane and grab some extra stuff. You're neurotic about this place Rick, and you don't need to be. If anyone should be worried about their lives, it's me and Negan. And we think we're winning Rick. Sanctuary is the last place that could fall, but still you're here, what? Protecting it? While Kingdom and Alexandria are actually at risk."

Rick stared at Morgan for a long moment, a violent eyebrow raised against him.

"I think next time you should keep your opinions to yourself." Rick stated and Morgan didn't back off, just flared an equally as tense look at Rick.

"Maggie's been asking me where Glenn is, and Eugene's absence is starting to get noticed too Rick. You can't keep this shit a secret for much longer."

"I  _won't_ be a secret for much longer. Shane's going to tell me where they moved their base and then we'll finish this." Rick retorted and Morgan let out an exasperated sigh.

"He doesn't know! You've asked him again and again Rick. Simon obviously moved their base after you took Shane. You should come with us on the run. Please Rick, you need to get away from the Sanctuary." Morgan pleaded and Rick looked down the barrel of his nose at the man, eyes narrowed.

"Maybe next time." Rick finally said. It was lie.

Morgan gave Rick a terse looked, then walked down the hall, Rick continued on his way. He just needed to stop by his room and then he would go out to see Shane again. Shane was slow in giving them information, but they had gotten a few good things from him, nothing that he'd felt like he should share with everyone else yet.

He pushed the door to his apartment open and made his way immediately to his fridge to grab some cold water. He set his bag on the kitchen counter and let out a long sigh. A noise from the room brought him out of his thoughts and put him on alert immediately.

The sound was Negan, who had let out a soft snore from the couch. He lay there with Andy on top of him, both of them seemingly fast asleep.

Rick hadn't seen Negan in over a week.

A smile broke across his face as he stared at the two of them for a moment and he twisted the wedding band on his finger. He missed Negan. Since the man had been gone he let Andy sleep on the bed with him, but it didn't fill the hole in his heart.

Negan gave one long snore that shook him awake. His eyes fluttered for a moment and he seemed like he was going back to bed, but then he noticed Rick and his eyes opened all the way. "You're home." Negan said with a lazy smile on his face.

"I think that's my line." Rick retorted.

"Come lay with us." Negan padded the tiny sliver of room on the couch that Rick would definitely not fit on.

"I don't know, you look pretty comfy there with Andy." Saying the dogs name woke him up and struggled to get off of Negan, shoving the man in the stomach and groin several times as the giant dog struggled to get off the couch and come to Ricks' side. Rick ruffled the wiry hair on Andy's head and the dog looked up at him with all the love in the world, Rick smiled back at him.

"There's plenty of room now."

Rick shucked his boots off and smooshed himself up against Negan, the man laughing as he had to wrap his arms around Rick to keep him from rolling off the couch. "I missed you." Negan said and pressed a kiss against Rick's forehead, Rick breathed in Negan's sent, pretty fucking rancid since he'd been out scouting for weeks, but Rick cherished it anyway.

"What made you come back?" Rick mumbled against the mans shirt.

"It's your birthday!" Negan stated in a very matter-of-fact voice.

"My birthday's in the winter." Rick responded. He'd actually never even told Negan that before, and Rick didn't know when Negan's birthday is.

"Damn, I guess you don't want the present I got you then?"

"I assume you're going to give it to me anyway?"

Negan laughed, and Rick could feel it vibrating against him, it felt like protection and love. Negan reached over Rick to grab something off of the coffee table. "I have to come clean though, technically Carl found the present, but he told me to give it to you. So it's from both of us."

Rick had to turn his body awkwardly so he could grab the gift from Negan's hand. It was a framed photo. He had to turn it over so he could see what the photo was of and then Rick took in a deep breath.

Him, Lori, and Carl. It was a picture from a restaurant in King's County. Maybe the only one left of them.

"She was very pretty." Negan said as he looked up at the picture with Rick.

"She was." He agreed as he stared up into the face of his long dead wife. He missed her a lot. Sure they didn't get along all the time, but he'd spent so much of his life with her, courting her, dating her, marrying her, raising a son with her. He brushed a thumb over her face and felt his lip quiver slightly, but he kept himself from crying. "She was funny too. When she wanted to be. I told Carl that a couple weeks ago and he didn't believe me." Rick let out a breath, almost a chuckle, but not quite audible. "She was always nagging him, but she was a sweet lady."

Negan pressed another kiss to Rick's temple and Rick reached over to set the photo gently back on the coffee table, he would cherish that.

"I love you." Negan said and Rick burrowed back into him, letting the man envelope him once again.

"I love you too."

* * *

**TWO WEEKS LATER**

**rick**

"We've narrowed them down to this area." Negan said, using an expo market to circle and area on the crude map he'd drawn. "Now to the east is a large forest, they  _could_ also be there, but as far as we know there isn't any sort of structure in the forest so it would be a bad position for them to take."

"What about the shipping yard in the north? It's outside the marked area but we really haven't checked it yet." Rosita said, pointing vaguely to a spot. Negan nodded and amended the circle to include that as well.

"Great! We've got them down to a what? Two hundred mile radius? Easy peasy." Dwight remarked sarcastically and Siddiq elbowed him in this ribs.

"That's down from the entire fucking state, so I'd say we're actually doing pretty well." Laura said, leaned back in her chair, her body-language conveying defeat.

"How many more scouting missions do we have planned?" Rick asked, his arms crossed over his chest. He shared a look with Eugene for a moment and then they broke eye contact.

Negan grabbed a folder from the table and pawed through it for a second. "Carol, Michonne, and Carl are leading squads right now, should be back within the week. Tomorrow we have me and Jesus going out. We haven't planned through next week. There's a summit Saturday night at Kingdom to talk about that."

"Who's gonna be going? Same crew as last time?" Laura asked and Negan slid the folder over to her. "Sherry's going this time? She's so busy with the crops though." Laura studied the list of names, looking concerned over several more of them.

"We need more people at the meeting. It's only for two days maximum."

"No one is going to the meeting." Rick suddenly interjected and all the white-noise chatter in the room stopped immediately.

"What?" Siddiq asked, raising both of his eyebrows.

"Well, Dwight you'll go. Tell Natania, Ezekiel, Deanna, and Maggie that Sanctuary is withdrawing its forces from the war. No more scouting missions involving our people for the time being. Tell them that I also encourage them to withdraw their troops. Sanctuary will cease all but the most necessary trade." Rick explained to a room full of confused and upset faces.

"So, what? We're just going to stop fighting?" Rosita, predictably, was the first to object, leaning over the table at him.

"It's our best course of action."

"Our  _best course of action?_ What are you stupid? You haven't been out there Rick! We can't just stop now."

"We have to." Rick said, not raising his voice at her. "Don't you get it? Simon's playing with us. We've been trying to find him for over a month now and we haven't seen any of their soldiers  _once._ But they've seen us. We've already lost people. They ambushed Kingdom without ever being seen. We can't possible wage a war when the enemy knows all of our movements and we don't know any of theirs."

"But we'll never  _learn_ their movements if we aren't out there." Laura argued.

"There's no point. That circle on the whiteboard? It doesn't mean  _anything._ Sure they could be somewhere in there, or they could be completely South of us and they're just trying to throw us off. We  _can't_ find them, we're going to have to wait until they come to us."

"We would lose so many more people that way." Negan spoke up and the two of them made tense eye contact for a moment.

"Would we? We're already losing people left and right, none of them even had a chance to fight back."

"Rick, with all due respect, I just don't think you understand enough about the current situation--" Siddiq said but Rick cut him off.

"I know all I need to know. I was voted to be in charge of this place, and I get the final say. Dwight, will you do as I asked?" Rick turned his attention to the man who looked very uncomfortable under Rick's gaze.

He nodded slowly. "Of course. Can you put it in writing for me? So I can show them proof of your word?" He asked and Rick agreed.

The atmosphere in the room was uncomfortable at best. Almost no one in the room agreed with Rick's decision.

* * *

**THREE DAYS LATER**

**dwight**

The theater at the Kingdom was packed.

Maggie, Natania, Deanna, and Ezekiel sat on the stage. There was an open chair between Maggie and Ezekiel, and uneasy looked on their faces at the fact. Dwight felt the most uneasy of all of them.

He was sitting in the front, next to some people from Oceanside that he'd never met before. Oceanside was still their own faction, but for now they were living within the borders of Alexandria, just until there was time for them to be moved into a new place. Everything had just been so busy recently.

Dwight wholeheartedly disagreed with Rick's decision to withdraw troops, and the thunderous anxiety in his mind was clouding everything around him. He barely even noticed the clearing of a voice that led to the room falling silent as Natania first spoke.

"Should we wait for Rick? Or is he not coming?"

Dwight felt frozen in his seat as he focused his eyes on his ratty jeans.

"Maybe we should wait a few more minutes?" Maggie suggested.

"No!" Dwight stood, forcing himself to in the sea of eyes on him.

Ezekiel raised an eyebrow at him. "Dwight! Of The Sanctuary, do you have news for us?" He asked in his usual booming voice, making Dwight feel even more unsteady on his feet.

He sured himself and pulled the handwritten note out of his bag. "I have a letter from Rick. He will not be attending the summit." Dwight admitted and made his way to the stage. He handed the letter to Maggie who skimmed through it quickly, a sour look overtaking her face.

"That's an interesting choice he's made." She muttered and passed over the open chair to Ezekiel. The man had a very similar reaction to reading it.

"What does it say!" A voice yelled from the crowd, Michonne, Dwight was pretty sure.

"It seems as if Sanctuary is withdrawing all support. They are decreasing trade as well." Deanna answered as she was finally given the letter. "And he encourages our communities to do the same.

Dwight was making his way off of the stage, glad to be done with that. He was embarrassed for the decision Rick had made. So many people were putting their lives on the line to see this war finished, and Rick was making a foolish decision that could prolong the war and increase the casualties.

"Dwight, is this The Sanctuary's final decision?" Deanna asked him and Dwight turned around, stopping as he was almost down the stairs.

He wondered for a moment if he should be honest or not. He could just lie and say that the council had come to the decision, that would probably make people even more mad than they were already. But to say that  _Rick Grimes_ had made this decision by himself... Dwight didn't know what to do.

"Please Dwight, tell us the truth." Jesus said softly from where he was sitting in the front row, right behind him. Dwight nodded.

"No. This was Rick's decision. The council disagreed. He said he wants Simon to come to us. He thinks it will decrease attrition. He thinks that Simon is out-strategizing us currently and that we need to be more careful. The rest of Sanctuary wants to continue in our efforts, but we can't go against Rick's word."

"That sounds like something Gregory would do!" A voice yelled from the theater, Dwight couldn't place it.

"We could still try to go on scouting missions. Just not as many of us." Dwight tried to make things better, but it seemed the theater had already made up their mind.

"We would appreciate all the help Sanctuary could still offer us. I think I speak for everyone here when I say we will not be taking the same steps as Rick." Natania said and a chorus of agreement came from the crowd.

"Then we'll continue to help in any way we can."

Dwight took his seat again and the meeting continued.

After proceedings were over, Dwight made his way with the rest of the crowd towards the exit, but he was stopped by Jerry on his way.

"The king wants to talk to you."

Dwight followed behind him, still feeling like he was out of place. He was just a follower. He wasn't a Rick or a Negan or an Ezekiel.

In a small room behind the stage sat each of the community leaders plus Jesus and Michonne, Rick's letter haphazardly laying on the table in the middle of all of them.

"Take a seat Dwight." Jesus offered, motioning to the seat next to him. Dwight acquiesced.

"Do you really think that no one at Sanctuary agrees with Rick?" Maggie asked him, not beating around the bush.

Dwight nodded. "Only a few people, like Eugene and maybe Morgan still agree with him, but the rest of us are still fully committed to finding Simon and killing him."

"I've had a bad feeling about Rick for a while now." Ezekiel said, slipping out of his kingly voice and into his normal voice, showing just how distressed he was by his own admonition.

Natania nodded. "I have too. He came to the last summit meeting at least, but he hadn't been on one scouting mission. Negan has been spearheading the war effort. Do you think Negan would go against Rick?"

"I think if it was for the right cause then yes. He's not afraid to tell Rick when he's making a bad decision."

"Good, because we think we've found a possible place that Simon could have set up an outpost. We found something of Simon's that he left behind at Alexandria, using Rick's dog we could probably sniff out the place and find out if Simon has been there." Michonne explained and passed a folder over to Dwight who opened it and perused the information for a second.

It was details of an elite group: Negan, Michonne, Jesus, Aaron, Laura, and most importantly: Andy. "I can give this to Negan, but I can't promise anything."

"That's all we need Dwight, thank you."

* * *

**ONE WEEK LATER**

**rick**

"Finally back Rick, gonna put me out of my misery this time?" Shane goaded as Rick unlocked the door of the house they were keeping Shane in.

Glenn had been standing watch at the door. He'd run into them on a scavenging run and made it clear that he sympathized with Rick's ideas. Him, Eugene, and Morgan were the only ones who knew that Shane was here and Rick would keep it that way until Shane gave them some actual information.

Rick ignored Shane's words. "I brought some bourbon." Rick pulled it out of his bag. "Your favorite kind right?"

Shane looked impassive.

"No strings attached, you can have it." Rick set it down in front of the man who had one hand handcuffed to a radiator. He was also locked in the living room, and there was usually a guard at the door. Shane didn't touch the liquor.

"Just remind me the names of the man that Simon's working with." Rick asked. He'd gotten the name plenty of times before. He just liked to be reminded.

"I told you already. It's a man that tried to kill my group once. Gareth. We killed the rest of his group back at Terminus, but he found new people I guess. I don't like him, for obvious reasons." Shane explained and Rick nodded.

"That's it. Thanks." Rick said and walked towards the door.

"Wait, what? You're not going to ask me anything else?"

Rick just shook his head and left.

There was nothing more effective for getting Shane to crack than leaving him alone with his own thoughts.

Back at The Sanctuary crops were being harvested. They'd had a good year for food and Alden was currently working on curing meat from a cow they'd slaughtered. The winter was barely going to affect them.

They still hadn't heard from Simon, and Rick wasn't currently bothering himself with the other communities so he didn't know if they were having run ins with him or not. He figured Sanctuary would be told if anyone happened to find out where Simon was, but Rick doubted they would ever find him. Shane had mentioned that they moved around a lot, it would be almost impossible to pin them down.

"Hey Rick!" Sherry greeted, carrying two precariously stacked baskets of carrots.

"Need some help Sherry?" He asked, going to grab one of the baskets, but she shook her head.

"I've got it! Thanks. Siddiq mentioned a little while ago that he needs a hand in the infirmary though." She said and then Dwight was behind her with two more baskets of carrots, looking like he was having a harder time carrying them than Sherry was.

"Alright, thanks Sherry." He said and she nodded at him with a smile before she and Dwight made their way indoors. Carrots weren't really great for saving over the winter, so they would be eating a lot of carrot based soups and stews for a few months.

"Rick! You gotta see what Enid made!" Alden called him over. The man was drinking from a mug and he seemed to be very happy about whatever was in the cup.

"Enid?"

"Oh yeah, she just got here today, Alexandria sent her to learn under Siddiq. She's great." Alden gushed and handed Rick the cup.

The smell coming from it was nostalgic, but he couldn't quite place it. When he took a sip though he knew immediately, pumpkin spice.

"Damn, she is great." Rick nodded and took another sip before handing it back to Alden.

"Yeah! I guess Alexandria has a  _bunch_ of pumpkins, so she brought over like a whole barrel of this syrup shit, it's also great with rum."

"I'll keep that in mind, speaking of Siddiq, is he up in the clinic?"

"Yep, he's up there."

Rick shared a nod with Alden and then headed towards the door.

He was cut off by the sound of the gate opening. A lone car pulled into the Sanctuary parking lot that Rick didn't recognize, he also only vaguely recognized the driver.

The man was in a panic though as he got out of the car, it seemed as if no one really knew who he was. "Is Rick here! I need to talk to Rick!" He called and Rosita was the first to approach him, asking him who he was as Rick approached the scene.

"I'm Aaron, you know me, I administered first aid when you got shot. I'm from Alexandria." He explained quickly.

"I'm Rick, Aaron, what's going on?"

"There was a scouting party that went out yesterday. Negan, Michonne, Jesus, Laura and I."

Rick furrowed his brows. "Negan and Laura went out scouting?" He flashed his eyes up to Rosita who didn't make eye contact with him. "They took Andy with them! They told me they were making a delivery!" He yelled, taking his anger out on Rosita.

"What were we supposed to do Rick?! Just let the other communities do the heavy lifting for us?" She asked, finally looking up at him. Rick frowned and looked back to Aaron.

"Where is everyone?"

"I--I don't know. That's what I came to tell you. Andy caught a sent and then we were ambushed. I got out, I thought everyone else had too. When I finally went back to see where everyone had ended up, no one was there anymore, just a lot of blood and no bodies... But we know that doesn't mean anything."

Rick felt the veins in his neck twitching. "They're dead? Everyone?" He clenched his jaw and shivered as his hair brushed the nape of his neck. "Andy? Negan? Laura?"

"They're presumed dead Rick, I'm sorry. I found two things, it's, I don't know if you want to see them." Aaron sounded reluctant.

"What is it?" His voice came out far more venomous than he meant it too as Aaron fumbled with his satchel as he pulled out an object wrapped in cloth, some of the cloth had bloodstains on it. Rick took it from Aaron and clumsily unwrapped it with his one hand.

Laying on the cloth was a large paw with grey wiry fur, and next to the paw was a simple gold wedding band.

Any & Negan.


	12. It's Pulp Fiction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all! I have a slightly important note for you:  
> I went back and reread every comment I've ever gotten on this fic so that I could once again get a feel of what people loved about it, and it seemed to boil down to one thing: It's more hopeful than the show. So much was going right for them at the beginning, and unfortunately I can't keep that same vibe while they're in the middle of a war. Just keep in mind that things ~will~ look up! I'm not going to just indiscriminately kill all your favorite characters (just a few of them). xoxo -Cessa

**FOUR DAYS LATER**

**rick**

"Fuck! I didn't know he was going to kill this many people! I'm just as trapped as you guys are." Shane shouted as soon as he had the handcuffs off. He rubbed at the indents they left on his wrists.

"You thought that he could make due on all of his promises to you without hurting anyone? Power comes at a price, Shane. Even children know that." Eugene retorted robotically as he pushed Shane outside of the shack and locked the door behind them.

"He played us man, he said everything he had to say to make it seem like he was the good guy." Shane argued.

"I always thought you had a better bullshit detector than me Shane. A man walks up to you and gives you supplies from a community you've never been too, for  _free_? Then he promises you that you can be in charge of  _everything_  if you just help him kill these five people. Just five, no more people have to die, how fucking easy would that have been?" Rick asked him rhetorically and Shane just shook his head, frowning at the ground. "He did it, in case you were worried that it wouldn't work out for you guys. Abraham's dead, Noah's dead, Negan's dead, Morgan took off, and I'm sure I'm not long for this world."

"He killed Negan? Fuck, Rick, I could have  _stopped_ him if I wasn't here!" Shane bellowed and Rick almost could have believed him. But he wouldn't do that to himself.

"STOPPED HIM? You were committed to kill every one of those people. Why is Negan more important that Abraham? Than fucking Noah. He was barely out of his teens Shane, he was a child. I don't want you to have saved Negan because you knew he meant something to me, I want you to have not taken part in killing any of them because you're a decent fucking human being. And Simon was wrong, by the way. Killing them didn't  _break_ anyone, it furthered their resolve to kill him. Now get in the fucking car."

Glenn gave Shane a shove and he stumbled into the backseat of the car, Glenn sliding in next to him. Rick and Eugene got in the front.

"Where are you taking me?"

"We're going to drive 18 miles out. And then what happens to you depends on how you answer one more question." Eugene said, his voice cool and calm.

"I've told you  _everything._ "

"The shot that killed Noah. It was from an incredibly far range and it was a clean shot. It didn't just nick him, far as I can tell it went square through the forehead. I don't know of many people who could make a shot like that, but you used to be a Sheriff's deputy. I'm sure you have experience."

Shane was silent for a long moment.

"I didn't know he was that young." He finally commented and Eugene pressed his lips together, gripping the door of the car so harshly that his knuckles were white.

The rest of the drive was silent. Rick made eye contact with Glenn a few times in the rear-view mirror. He'd been an interesting addition to their team, one that Rick hadn't been expecting. He agreed with Rick that they should wait until Simon came to them, he'd also been their the day that Noah died and he'd helped Rosita when she'd been shot. He was in the fold. Rick figured that Glenn wanted a power position like his wife, and this was a way for him to feel like that.

18 mile markers later and Rick pulled off the road into a scenic turn out. They were on a cliff side in the middle of a forest. Rick didn't really know where they were in relation to the other communities.

"Get out." Rick told Shane and the man fumbled for a moment before exiting the car.

"Rick, man, don't kill me. That makes you no better than him. Please brother." Shane pleaded and Rick spared him one last glance before driving away, leaving Shane standing in the road.

* * *

**SAME TIME**

**rosita**

They'd been silent on the drive over. Maybe a few getting-to-know-you questions that were painfully awkward and neither of them really cared. Michael was in a car seat in the back. Rosita didn't feel safe leaving him alone with anybody at this point.

"Are you sad?" Dwight finally asked even as they could see the gates to Hilltop just in the distance. They both watched as Kal turned from his guard post to yell about the arrival of a car.

"About what? My best friend dying three months ago and then everyone I thought I was close to abandoning me? Because yeah, that kind of sucks."

"Sorry."

"It was a stupid question." Rosita quipped.

Another moment of silence.

"Are you?" She finally asked.

"I miss them. I miss all of them. I wish we knew where Rick was... He's been reckless recently. I hope he isn't throwing everything away. I wish there was some way to tell him that we still believe in him, we just don't agree with him."

Rosita pursed her lips, unsure if she agreed.  _Do I believe in Rick Grimes?_ She wiped her eyes. She wanted too, so bad. She always had, but now?

"I believe in myself." She finally said, her voice wetter than she expected. To Dwight's credit, he ignored that fact.

They pulled the car in and parked it right outside the Barrington House. They were all at a picnic table eating some weird looking pancakes--all the leaders. It was early. Maybe seven in the morning? She didn't know, they'd started driving before sun up.

Rosita grabbed Michael's car seat from the back. He was still sleeping, thankfully, and she set it gently on the ground next to where she'd be sitting.

"Dwight, Rosita, good to have you. I assume Rick won't be coming?" Deanna asked. She looked tired. They all looked tired.

"Rick's gone." Dwight answered bluntly. "We thought he was taking the news of Negan's death surprisingly well. He seemed completely nonplussed and got right back to work, but he just left yesterday morning. Eugene went with him. And Morgan and Duane disappeared the day before that."

The exhaustion of the group was almost palpable after that.

"Could it be possible that they were taken?"

"I don't think so. Morgan and Duane had all their stuff packed up. When Rick left he told me to take care of myself and then just walked out of the gates. I didn't really think anything of it at the time. Eugene was gone shortly after that."

"I should probably tell you guys now that Glenn is gone." Maggie finally spoke up and everyone turned to look at her. Rosita could see that her eyes were ringed with red. She could sympathize. "I didn't realize this until just now, but he told me he was going to deliver some things to Eugene, he also left yesterday morning."

"What the fuck are they doing?" Ezekiel questioned, slipping once again out of his dramatic voice.

"What the fuck indeed." Deanna echoed.

"Rick has always been the most level headed of us. It may not seem like it recently but I've known him for a long time, longer than anyone here. But he's completely unwavering when he thinks he's made the right decision. I'm starting to think that maybe it was wrong of us to dismiss his ideas so fast."

* * *

**3 YEARS, 5 MONTHS AGO**

**(barely a month after the groups meet)**

**dwight**

"It's  _simple,_ in and out. I'll send Andy in ahead to flush them out." Rick directed and Dwight nodded. He stood at the door to a  _Target_ that looked like it had only been barely looted. Or at least just looted in the beginning when people were just stealing valuables.

Rick gave him a nod and then Dwight pulled the door open. Andy shot inside, barking up a storm. They'd surrounded the store in a ring of cars so that they wouldn't be attacked from behind. Morgan, Duane, Sherry, and Arat stood watch in the parking lot.

Dwight was waved in by Rick, the first.

It was dark inside, he had his flashlight in one hand and knife in the other. Andy had stopped barking and circled around back towards them. Dwight couldn't hear anything so he assumed that they were alone. This was a good find. They were all running out of clothes and some of the newer  _Targets_ had a lot of dry foods in them. They could also use some new bags too. All in all, they needed  _stuff._

Negan was in after him and jogged to catch up with him while Rick, Simon, and Laura went the opposite direction of them.

"So, Dwighty boy," Dwight shot Negan a look for the name, Negan just grinned. "Lay it on me, what are your thoughts on sheriff friendly?"

Dwight shrugged. He didn't know. He and Sherry had been mostly keeping to themselves. He stopped walking when they reached the sporting goods section and Dwight picked up a duffel bag to fill with shit. Negan did the same.

"Oh come on, you gotta have some kind of opinion."

"He seems fine. I doubt I would have liked him before all of this, but he's a good guy." Dwight finally answered as he swiftly moved through the aisles, shoving anything that looks usable into his bag. Disgusting looking Gatorade Energy Chews? Check. The largest box he'd ever seen of tampons? Check. A Scrabble board? Check. The multi-pack of condoms that he'd always been too embarrassed to buy? Check.

"I don't like him." Negan admitted and Dwight looked at him with furrowed brows.

"Really? You seem kind of buddy-buddy with him." He remarked. Negan's bag was nowhere near as full as his. The man seemed more interested in talking than scavenging.

"Well, yeah. I want him to trust me. Listen, I think things worked a lot smoother when I was the only one in charge. Don't you?"

Dwight felt like Negan was goading him into a corner, pressuring him for an answer. Honestly, Dwight wasn't the biggest fan of Negan. He liked to push people around and manipulate them. He didn't seem dangerous, just power hungry. He needed someone to knock some sense into him.

"I suppose things worked well. I'm not really complaining right now though."

"Just wait, he's going to make some major call that screws things up for everybody. He's one of those high and mighty types who wants to act like he doesn't really want to be in charge, but I know the truth. He's just as fucked up as the rest of us and is relishing in the fact that he finally has real power in his life." Negan grabbed a bottle of some shitty looking  _Target_ wine and shoved it into his bag.

"Yeah, I can see that. It's probably because he was a cop." Dwight suggested. Rick had a take charge personality and Dwight could respect that. But Negan had a similar leadership style and they hadn't suffered under him.

"I'm planning on leaving soon. I want you and Sherry to come with me."

Dwight gave him a side eye and shrugged. "Sure, I'm not attached to these people or anything."

"I also want to steal that dog on our way out. He's useful."

Dwight thought for a second and then nodded. "Shouldn't be too hard. When are we leaving?"

"Tonight. The sooner the better."

They both were about to say more when they heard the snarl of a walker, the familiar sound of a knife squelching into its head. "We gotta get out of here!" Rick shouted, his voice echoing through the store.

"What's going on!?" Negan responded, jogging towards the noise.

"There's a lot of them in there, we gotta get going." Rick ushered. Laura was already rushing to gather her stuff up, taking Rick's word as gospel.

Negan spotted the door that Rick was talking about, there were walkers pressed up against the other side. "It'll hold." He countered and Rick shook his head.

"Look, see that door over there," Rick pointed to another wall and Negan could just barely make it out in the dark. "Laura told me she worked at a store with a layout like this, there's a hallway that connects the two doors and there's also walkers completely pressed up against that door. If they get out then we're surrounded."

"They won't get out. Look Rick, we need this stuff. We can't go now." Negan countered.

"We're leaving."

Negan looked impossibly angry. Dwight thought for sure that this is where Rick's reign ended, where Negan finally shot him dead.

"Come on, let's just go." Laura urged.

It seemed that everyone sided with Rick, so Dwight watched as Negan forced himself to walk towards the exit. Negan's body language was tight though, and Dwight knew this wasn't over.

When they got to the exit they heard both door break from pressure within seconds of one another. Enough walkers pressing against shoddy doors was sure to break them. They booked it out the doors. The front doors were easy to get out of, they'd have to get out of the parking lot in record time.

Before they rushed into action Dwight noticed a peculiar look on Negan's face as he studied Rick. Dwight didn't know what to make of it, but hopefully it would calm things down between them.

It would at least be easier for them to leave if they didn't kill Rick.

They never did leave.

* * *

**NOW**

**rick**

They looped the car around to a predetermined location, then they walked to where they'd left Shane. As expected, he was gone.

"Glenn, you got this?" Rick asked and Glenn nodded.

"Yeah, Daryl's shown me a thing or two about tracking." He responded and then they got to work.

Shane had obviously left quickly after they dropped him off, and the trail was easy to pick up. They worked through the forest in a way that made it seem like Shane had known where he was going. They were moving fast, hopefully faster than Shane would have been.

Eugene had taken another car and was circling it around the other side of the forest. He would walkie in if he found Shane.

It was a few miles at least of walking. They found a few walkers who looked like they'd had their heads bashed in with rocks. Rick knew that Shane would be able to make do.

Finally, they heard noises and slowed their roll, coming to an outcropping of bushes, beyond which they could see Shane talking to some people in a lifted jeep. They looked dangerous, but not hostile towards Shane.

"Get in. Simon's not going to be happy with you." One woman said.

"What the fuck was I supposed to do? They abducted me." Shane complained as he got into the back of the car. Glenn radio'd in where they were to Eugene. This would be the day they got Simon. Rick would die for it if he had to.

They followed shortly behind the car to the junkyard that had been the other possible hideout Rick had in mind for them. Shane had adamantly denied that they had any ties to this place. Rick should have known he'd been lying.

"What's the plan?" Glenn asked as the car rolled to a stop.

"We each go in from different sides. Glenn, I want to remind you, you  _don't_ have to do this. I know that Simon will kill us if he finds us."

Glenn looked conflicted for a moment and then shook his head. "We're not going to get caught."

Rick envied his optimism, but pitied his bravado.

They split up, each one of them circling the junkyard and looking for another back way in. It would make noise crawling over all of the garbage, but there was a lot of talking and moving around coming from within, so hopefully they wouldn't be noticed too quickly. If at all.

* * *

**ONE HOUR LATER**

**rick**

"I knew you were stupid Rick, but  _this_ stupid?" Simon questioned.

Rick was on the ground in a shipping container in the junkyard. Simon, Shane, and another man stood in front of him. Eugene and Glenn weren't with him.

"Fuck you." Rick grit out.

"Who else came with you?" Simon asked.

"No one."

Shane looked like he was going to speak up for a moment, but then something changed on his face and he remained, thankfully, silent on the matter.

"You know, you're not the only person we have captured in the junkyard. Picked up two others just this morning. They were outside the fences of Hilltop, crying or some shit. I don't know. Rosita and Maggie. They're in the same damn situation you've gotten yourself into."

Rick paled. Rosita  _and_ Maggie. Fuck. He knew that Glenn shouldn't have come. Fuck.  _Fuck._

"I can tell by the look on you face that this must be very unexpected. Thanks for returning my man to me though. It's good to have my second in command once again. And you haven't met  _Gareth._ He's my favorite, really. You know he eats people? Isn't that fucked up?" Simon pointed to the black haired man who remained silent.

"Let Rosita and Maggie go."

"No, I don't think I will."

"I'm going to kill you."

Simon snorted.

"Not now. But I will. I swear to God. I'll die to protect these communities." He'd die to protect Carl and Judy and everyone else who didn't need to die in this useless war.

There was a knock at the train car and Simon gave Shane a hand gesture making him open it.

It was Glenn, on his knees with a gun at the back of his head. He had a gag in his mouth.

"Found this one too." A nameless soldier told Simon.

Glenn was thrown in the car next to Rick.

"Looks like we've got a full boat." Simon turned to speak to Gareth and Shane after this, but it was obvious he wanted them to overhear. "Kill the Asian in the morning, save Rick, we can make an execution out of him. One of you two stand guard."

"I'll do it." Shane offered immediately and Gareth gave him a look but didn't question it. The two men left.

Rick took the gag out of Glenn's mouth as soon as they left. Shane didn't comment. "Glenn they have Maggie and Rosita." Glenn paled immediately and looked frantically towards Shane and the door.

"Don't even think about it." Shane warned. "I don't think he'll hurt Maggie, just please don't try anything." Shane pleaded with them and they both gave him a nasty look. "How did you even get into this mess?"

"You really think we were just going to let you go? We followed you." Glenn said, his voice more vicious than Rick had ever heard. Shane pursed his lips.

"Listen, I don't want you guys to die. I really don't. Rick, I know that you don't care, but you're still my best friend. I don't think you should be fucking executed."

"You hold all the power here Shane. You don't want us to die? Make it so we don't." Rick suggested and Shane gripped at his gun. "Get us guns, make a distraction, get us out of here. Maggie and Rosita too."

Shane's jaw clenched and Rick sighed. Shane was a spineless son of a bitch, he would never risk his own life to help them.

"Wait here." Shane finally said.

As soon as Shane was gone Glenn spoke up.

"We're getting Maggie out of here. I don't care what happens to you or me."

Rick gave him a nod.

When Shane got back he had two small pistols in his possession and turned them over.

"I can't do anything until tomorrow, you guys will just have to wait it out."

Rick shared a long moment with Shane when he handed him the gun, both of them still holding onto it. They shared a nod and then fell back into silence. Rick didn't really know what to think. Did Shane's turn coat actions free him of all crimes? No... Everyone would want Shane dead no matter what he did to try and get back in good graces. Rick could work something out. He could let him go, say that he ran away... But he killed Noah.

He gripped the gun in his hand and beseeched Shane's turned head.  _What do you expect from me?_

It was probably hours later when they heard the first gun shots. Rick and Glenn were both on their feet immediately, ready to go. They shared a look with each other, both confused.

"Shit." Shane muttered and cracked the shipping container a little bit. to see what was going on. "Both of you sit back down. This is a volatile group we're with, sometimes there's infighting. Simon will come check on the prisoners after everything has calmed down."

There were no screams or anything so Rick figured Shane was right about it just being a small fight.

Moments later there was a rattling outside the shipping container, someone trying to open it.

"It's Simon. I--I'm going to shoot him." Shane said, sounding terrified even as he said it.

"What? No, Shane this is reckless. We just need to get out." Rick argued.

"This will confuse everyone. It will give us an escape." Shane countered and brought his gun up, steadying it where the door would open.

" _Shane,_ come on!" Glenn shout-whispered.

There was no changing his mind.

* * *

**ONE HOUR PRIOR**

**eugene**

He'd seen Glenn get taken in, but Eugene wasn't against diving into a pile of garbage to escape capture.

There was nothing he could have done in that moment. Trying to get Glenn from imprisonment would have been stupid and foolhardy, especially since he knew that Rick was also currently in confines. He'd need to get the both of them.

He circled the compound several times. There was minimal security on the outside, he figured it was because they looked unimposing, they weren't usually trying to keep people out. Inside though, from what he'd seen, they were well armed. There was no way he was simply going to be able to take them all out.

A distraction was in order.

Climbing back up the mountain of trash, he found where the armory was. It was in a shipping container off away from everyone else, there was a guard at the front of it and it was buried under a mountain of trash.

What they didn't realize when they put the armory in the container though, was that it was so long, the rear entrance barely had any trash on it. It took a few good swipes of garbage, moving a few chairs, and finally he was around the back.

He climbed up the heap one more time to see if the guard had heard any noises, but he had headphones plugged into a battery powered cd player.

The container had exactly what he needed. An AR with an extended magazine. Eugene grabbed it and slung it over his shoulder. All he needed now was a skein of yarn or some other strong string, a heavy clamp, and an especially high mountain of trash.

The string was easy to find, and he amalgamated one long piece out of several that he found. The clamp brought him around the complex a few more times.

He stopped for a moment when he heard a familiar voice. "You fucking cunt! Let me out of here. Don't touch me!" Eugene strained his hearing. Where did he know that.

"Now, now Rosita, no need to use such hostile language."  _That_ was Simon.

Eugene climbed again and had to duck to narrowly avoid a sentry. Rosita was being shoved into a shipping container and the door was shut heavy behind her. There was no lock on the door but a man stood guard.

He felt white hot rush through his veins. They'd taken Abraham and Noah from him. They  _weren't_ taking Rosita. He abandoned the AR for a moment and made his plan of attack.

He could probably sneak up on the guard with a knife. There was always a chance the guard would be able to beat him in a fight, but if he stabbed him before he got the chance... He had no other options.

Eugene crept behind the man, didn't bother muffling his voice before stabbing him in the back. Thankfully, he didn't have the chance to shout before he collapsed to the ground. He opened the container and Rosita immediately had him shoved up against the wall, her forearm in his neck. It took her a moment to realize who he was.

" _Eugene?_ Fuck, sorry." She let him go and he sucked in a few deep breaths. Maggie was in the container as well, looking royally pissed off. "What are you doing here."

"There's no time. Rick and Glenn are in a container up that way, your first right. They should have a guard on them too. I'm going to create a distraction, sit tight here until you hear it, and you'll hear it." Eugene gave Rosita his knife and Maggie took the gun from the guard he'd killed.

"Oh my God, I could almost hug you right now." Rosita sighed and Eugene tried to hide his smile.

"Like I said, we don't have time. Stay low, listen in." And then he clambered back over the wall of garbage. This plan was going a lot better than expected. He still hadn't worked out how he was going to cause a distraction  _and_ stage a rescue.

There was one main garbage pile that shadowed the main area of the junkyard, where most of the people were situated, and at the base of that pile? A giant, industrial sized clamp that Eugene could barely lift.

Somehow, probably out of pure adrenaline, he hefted the clamp to the top of the garbage pile. He twisted the pincers as tight as he could around the stock of the gun and gave it a few good tugs. It wasn't going anywhere. The clamp would hold it in place for as long as he needed it to be. Eugene tied the string through the small hole in the trigger, a tight knot. He gave a  _tiny_ experimental pull and found that it wouldn't pull the gun out of the clamp.

Then he took hold of the string and walked it back down the side of the heap. Right as he was nearing the end of the length he tight it around a telephone pole. With one final tug the gun started going off. Rapid fire with no aim. He tied a knot quickly and then ran off to the most likely spot Rick and them would be coming from.

It wouldn't be a long distraction, but it would give them some time.

* * *

**SAME TIME**

**rick**

The door swung the rest of the way open and Shane fired.

Glenn shouted, and Maggie screamed.

Rick's vision went slow motion for a moment as he assessed what had just happened.

Maggie. On the ground. Shot in the stomach. Bleeding. Shane.

Rick brought his own gun up, zero hesitation, and shot Shane in the head. His hand was shaking so badly that he was surprised he even made the shot.

Glenn was on the ground by Maggie, pressing against her abdomen. He stripped his shirt off immediately and tied it tightly around her.

"We--We have to go!" Rosita yelled, her voice unsteady, she couldn't take her eyes off of Maggie. Glenn picked her up and she screamed again in pain.

There were trash people all around them. Rick and Rosita shot indiscriminately as they ran. Following Glenn. They didn't even know where they were going.

The smallest trash pile seemed to be their final destination and Glenn furiously clambered over it.

Eugene was waiting on the other side with their running car.

They drove away.

"Glenn I love you. You know that?"

"Yeah Mags. I know that. I know, you don't need to talk, don't strain yourself."

"Remember the--the pharmacy?"

"I remember."

"My daddy didn't like you back then."

"Yeah, I gathered that."

"He really loved you later," Maggie coughed, blood running out of her mouth. "He loved you like his own son."

Glenn couldn't respond, he was too choked up.

"Maggie, please open your eyes."

Her eyes fluttered open again.

"Please stay with me. What am I going to tell Carol and Carl? Sasha? Daryl?"

"You tell them I'm with my daddy and Bethy. Patricia, Otis. Sophia. Bob and Andrea. Michonne, Negan..."

"No, no I can't tell them that. I won't. I won't have to. You're fine."

"Thank you for making me happy in the most impossible of circumstances. Thank you, for just a little bit of joy in this world."

"Maggie, no, no. Thank  _you_ for making all my dreams come true. I'm glad the world ended."

Maggie passed away in Glenn's arms on the ride to Hilltop.

Rick was pretty sure Glenn died too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -omfg i'm literally ugly crying this is disgusting  
> -I REALLY LIKED THIS CHAPTER I HOPE U DO TOO <3  
> -me: heehee i'm just going to pepper in a little bit of angst  
> me (20 minutes later): I'm a despot, unworthy of this life. for me the only salvation will be when i stop writing.


End file.
